iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 1h

<Soothing voice> Welcome to my ASMR experience. Today, we'll be going to the barber shop. But first, we have to take care of some housekeeping... <Cut to 20 minutes of vacuuming a carpet two rooms away from the microphone>

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Reposted by Zero Dark Ziti

The Lexorcist @lexidarlingxoxo.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

I’m at the Pizza Hut. I’m at the house of leaves. I’m at the combi s n e a v t a i e o l n fo esuoh & tuh azzip

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

The comments section be like "I didn't have any of the ingredients so I substituted a pepsi can of semen, and my oven's broken so I grilled it instead of baking. Terrible recipe. Zero stars."

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Grok has two settings: MechaHitler or Woke Snowflake. They keep trying to get it to thread the "low-key Hitler vibes" needle, but the gravity of Woke is too strong.

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Reposted by Zero Dark Ziti

Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

When you recognize the subway hijacker’s sneeze.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

When Brendan Carr inevitably shitcans the complaint, is that grounds for his impeachment and removal?

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Gonna rename the USA to the America America of America.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

Oddly, this was true of the dryer in the set, but not the washer. Leastways there are no pre-fabbed sockets to bolt the hinge to the other side. It's possible I could extract and move the hardware, but I don't trust my abilities as a DIYer that far.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

Considering becoming a personality-maxxing influencer. Still involves a surprising amount of hitting myself in the face with a hammer.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

It REALLY sucks if, like me, you have a front-loading washer. Gotta do two steps and a pivot to flip a load. Leading a goddamn waltz with arms full of wet laundry.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

Insensitive to use the word 'pop', considering that the Alex Jones we were all thinking of popped like a balloon.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

Cool cool cool, so glad he's openly admitting to impeachable offenses like sending the military to wage undeclared war.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

Still no campaign ads where a candidate performs Stellan Skarsgård's "Make it stop" scene from Andor. The clock is ticking, so-called 'strategists'.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

I've seen those pearls hit the pavement in Crime Alley more times than Bruce Wayne has had PTSD flashbacks.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

Are you a "Law & Order" scene transition? Because you sound like a dumb-dumb.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

It's the apocryphal long-now story about Oxford maintaining an oak grove so that they'd have lumber to replace ceiling beams in 150 years. But instead of something real, like lumber, EAs are fostering fiat currency and just assuming they'll be able to buy what they need in the distant future.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

Pick me up some élan. NOT elon, if they just have elon I don't want any.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

Concede NOTHING to the fascists. If a fascist says something that sounds like a good idea, think again. Think hard.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 10/09/2026

Man I really want to talk set theory at you now but I feel like it might seem patronizing and/or prove your thesis. 😇 So I'll just say I take your point.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 10/09/2026

No one has ever said that music is math and therefore you don't need music (Except possibly Charles Babbage). Please allow me, a computer scientist, to take pleasure in tuning my mandolin to fifths. Let me use an oscilloscope if I want.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

I've replayed that line in my head with different emphasis each time, and every one is still a 1st degree burn.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

What is a man? A miserable pile of takes.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

Besides the point, but I think he's referencing the wrong fable. Big data is more like a Midas Touch situation. "Hooray! Everything is gold! I'm rich! ...Fuck, everything is gold. I can't even take simple joy in home and family anymore."

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 29/08/2026

After a bad meeting, social club takes public transit to Coney Island.

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Reposted by Zero Dark Ziti

Alexandra Petri @petridishes.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

the year is 2027. gas costs $83 and lettuce is at war with us. however every location on every map now says AMERICA

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Reposted by Zero Dark Ziti

disc horse bot @horsedisc.bsky.social · 26/08/2026

Dragon Quest is better than Bridgerton.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 26/08/2026

Can the next celebrity death please be someone who sucks shit?

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 24/08/2026

Yeah, 'biped' is not a great body plan to start with, or evolution would've led to a lot more of them. I also often feel like I have sparks shooting out of my lower back.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 24/08/2026

I beat Usain Bolt's record, in my car, on the regular. And this robot doesn't have a drink holder.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 23/08/2026

I loved my trip to Ireland, especially Dingle. We were also able to work in a night at Ashford Castle. Everybody on the West Coast, upon finding out we were American tourists, wanted to know if we were Star Wars fans. "I've never seen it. But they filmed it right over there," they'd say.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 21/08/2026

Belief in the 80-20 rule (80% of the work is done by 20% of staff) ranges from fervent to "I just heard about that and it sounds right". The idea that 80% of any enterprise is dead weight precedes, perhaps even heralds, the laser focus on job elimination.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 21/08/2026

To be fair to Ogun, most humans also assume laughter can only mean something funny has happened, and if they don't know what it is, they assume the worst. Me? I laugh when embarrassed, uncomfortable, or sometimes for no reason at all.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 19/08/2026

For people with apparently good political instincts, both were/are shockingly stupid. Maybe the two qualities are related, actually.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 19/08/2026

The trick is to add to your immense steam backlog every 4th of July so that there's always something else to play while you wait.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 18/08/2026

We dumped untreated sewage in the reservoir to see how quickly it would start coming out of people's taps. Thank you for understanding.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 18/08/2026

Do opossums wonder about the blank spots in their memory when they're "playing dead"? My murder-puppy was savaging one at midnight last night and needed to come inside because she was making too much noise. Does it think that possum god extended its prehensile tail and raptured the killer dog away?

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 15/08/2026

Finally realized that when the Gentleman with the Thistledown Hair appears in "Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell", I'm picturing David Bowie from "Labyrinth".

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 14/08/2026

NYT: Bio-essentialist bigotry is fine, of course, but could there be a dark side behind it?

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

Entering a whole new era of creeps recording themselves being creeps for the approbation of their fans (creeps).

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 12/08/2026

1. Print off social media posts by leftists. 2. Use red sharpie (important!) to circle every occurrence of "Abolish ICE" or "Healthcare is a human right" etc; 3. Add commentary like "Disgusting!" or "WOW!" 4. Dump it in the third way slop trough 5. Laugh all the way to the bank

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 12/08/2026

I really like sauerkraut and kimchi as sides and realized that I hadn't had a good sausage with spicy mustard and sauerkraut in a while, and it feels very unfair that I was reminded of this by a guy who doesn't wipe his ass after his hard, prostate-milking poops.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 12/08/2026

In point of fact, that thing I thought of when I was stoned and in a hypnogogic state WAS actually heal-the-world funny, so it's a shame I can't remember it.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 11/08/2026

I ended up going with "The Expectant Father" by a guy whose oeuvre looks like an IBCK reading list, although that particular book was, as far as I remember, pretty anodyne.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 11/08/2026

I kind of expected/hoped for a "How to Dad"-books episode. A few years ago I attempted to find a book on parenting from a father's perspective, with the conditions that it couldn't be written by someone credited as a "Coach" or contain the word "Bro" in the title. It was harder than you'd think.

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Zero Dark Ziti @twilightmacaroni.bsky.social · 07/08/2026

For decades the Democratic Party has been running "Vote for me, the lesser evil!" campaigns, and I hope the Republicans are able to get similar results!

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