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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

I also like the idea of a reunion with Clay Holmes or adding Michael King. #Mets #LGM

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Call me crazy, but Jazz would be one of my top FA targets for the #Mets. #LGM

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Aaron Judge’s age 34 season. When the end comes for sluggers it comes FAST. And that’s why Pete Alonso — who is no Aaron Judge — is no longer a Met. #Mets #LGM

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 13/09/2026

Freddy Peralta’s WHIP and BB/9 rates. #Mets vs. Rays. But tell me again it’s not the players’ fault. Eff that guy. #LGM

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 25/08/2026

This is what all of these toxic manosphere grifters ultimately claim when the law inevitably comes a-knocking. 😤

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 15/08/2026

These two guys are the creators & original stars of “The Play That Goes Wrong” and I just realized they’re in #VisionQuest and I couldn’t be more freaking excited by that.

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 12/08/2026

I don’t know, man. These are the wrongest polls I’ve ever seen. If your polling model includes a 20 point margin of error you probably should start from scratch with a new model.

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 12/08/2026

Polling is dead; long live the pollsters.🤷‍♂️

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 06/08/2026

Here’s Rhys Hoskins — who was very mad about this — celebrating a HR while wearing his team’s celebratory medieval HR helmet. (Broadsword prop not pictured.)

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 06/08/2026

Rhys Hoskins: “I’m so mad that pitcher did a little dance. Also, when I hit a HR I put on a medieval helmet and broadsword to run up and down the dugout and pose for the camera.” #Guardians #Mets #LGM

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 04/08/2026

Just found out Marvel Comics made Mary Jane the new Venom, which essentially means she’s wearing her abuser (the Venom symbiote) on her body as a second skin. Of all the disgusting things Marvel has done to the Peter and MJ characters the last 2 decades, this is the worst. #SpiderMan

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 02/08/2026

Freddy Peralta has pitched to the highest FIP (fielding independent pitching) stat of his career this season. By a LOT. (A high FIP is bad.) Say what you want about everything else swirling around the #Mets, but in the case of Freddy Peralta’s Mets tenure? He was his own biggest problem. #LGM

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 02/08/2026

Soto is having a baseline career season (with injuries), & Alvarez is having a better-than-average season, but with injuries, & his backup is having a worse-than-average season. #Mets #LGM

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 02/08/2026

Pictured: The 7 members of the #Mets projected 2026 starting lineup whose season numbers are well below their career numbers and who, in many cases, are having the worst season of their careers, both statistically & health-wise. #LGM

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 01/08/2026

The only Met having an above career average season is Francisco Alvarez. Soto is having his exact baseline year. Everyone else is well below their average performance. So while this is not necessarily a collection of players that hit for average normally, they’re underperforming across the board.

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 30/07/2026

Damn. I guess this is how the high-lit crowd subtweets each other. “I understand why she’d go full simpleton with her translation; writing for children is the easiest way for a writer to cash in and sell-out.” 🤣

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 27/07/2026

Here’s the only quote you really need from this article. #Mets #LGM

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 27/07/2026

Couldn’t agree with this assessment more:

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 21/07/2026

He had a bit of a hot streak. But he’s cooled off again.

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 21/07/2026

2026 Freddy Peralta has: The 2nd worst ERA+ of his 9-year career The worst FIP of his career The 2nd worst H9 of his career The 3rd worst HR9 of his career The 3rd worst BB9 of his career The worst SO/9 of his career The worst SO/BB of his career The 2nd lowest WAR of his career #LGM #Mets

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 19/07/2026

Stop scrolling and post two characters who bring you happiness. (This is cheating but writing these two characters brings me such joy.)

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 18/07/2026

Jason Baychette. Just unbelievable how bad this guy has been. Cursed franchise. (He was injured for the entirety of 2024.) #Mets #LGM

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 18/07/2026

Tell me how this, for example, is anyone’s fault but Bichette’s and I’ll stop pointing out how ludicrous it is to blame anyone but the players first. (Remember: he was injured all through 2024. He has been healthy all of 2026.)

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 18/07/2026

The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie is a pretty good one, too.

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 09/07/2026

The fact that he mentions FanDuel by name is the part that’s gonna be tough for him to explain.

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 08/07/2026

Translation: admin is having the professor figure out a way to determine if students used GenAI to cheat cuz they either can’t or won’t. Probably both.

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 08/07/2026

Anyone who doesn’t want to see a Nolan-directed ODYSSEY is racist or misogynist or in some other way has allowed anger & hatred to take over their perception of the world. The alien symbiote has bonded to them completely & it’s going to take divine intervention to slough it off of them.

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 07/07/2026

It’s what he does. This is my favorite book on Trump. Explains him perfectly.

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 29/06/2026

Here in Dublin for the opening of my new play, and obviously repping the Mets while I’m in town. (Nobody here knows how bad they are.)

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tomhoefwrites.bsky.social @tomhoefwrites.bsky.social · 27/06/2026

Codename: S.T.E.A.M was the sh!t. That’s it. That’s the… uh… Sky? Skeet? Cloud? #Nintendo

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