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yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 26/09/2026

Do you think we can get Ernest Borgnine for Sam? Do we have Laser Mission money?

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yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 22/09/2026

If I never read "AI actress Tilly Norwood" again, it will be too soon.

yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 26/08/2026

Bathtub in an elevator—why? Bathtub in an elevator with a bath mat draped over the side—oh, it’s art!

A bathtub in an elevator, a bath mat hung on the side

yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 01/07/2026

Why haven't millennials killed fireworks yet?

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yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 17/04/2026

My favorite version of this is from Minority Report, which signals the future by having passengers on the train reading a newspaper with a dynamically updating display, but still in the same bulky, folding, obnoxious broadsheet format for some reason.

yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 03/04/2026

Working title: Scout's Honor

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yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 03/04/2026

Movie idea: a boy scout is wronged by international crime smugglers and cuts a path of revenge through their ranks using the skills he has learned through scouting. Each time he uses a skill to kill someone, he tears the merit badge off his sash and leaves it behind as a calling card.

yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 16/03/2026

In Central New York, it was the Erie Canal, to remind us all of the last time Central New York was economically relevant.

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yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 15/03/2026

What ever happened to all those Mattel movies we were supposed to get after the success of Barbie? How are future generations even going to develop a weird post-apocalyptic religion around the only surviving media (the Polly Pocket movie) if they don't get made?

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yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 10/03/2026

Business idea: wonton soup with tiny wontons so you can eat it with a boba straw

yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 11/02/2026

If it gets to be a problem you can always go to one of your neighbors and ask to borrow a cup of internet.

yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 07/02/2026

What if your superpower was phlogiston manipulation and then they proved phlogiston wasn't real. You'd probably feel pretty stupid.

David_j_roth @davidjroth.bsky.social · 06/02/2026

Reposted by yer pal mumbles

Clapping my flippers together and honking like a harbor seal when a Super Bowl ad for a condiment or gambling app featuring two celebrities unexpectedly reveals a third celebrity as its punchline. Bouncing a ball around on my snout. My wife has to throw me a herring to get me to calm down.

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yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 28/01/2026

What did they call the British invasion in the UK? The poppucation?

yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 26/01/2026

These goons really think they need neo-Lamarckism to explain their authoritarian impulses, when they have an embarrassment of character defects to choose from.

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Stellbound: Stellraiser II @antlervel.vet · 23/01/2026

Gotcha—let’s dig into that step by step. 1. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗻𝗼 𝗺𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗵, because I turned you into an amorphous lump of flesh. You’re not just immobile—you’re immortal, and you feel only anguish. 2. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗺. That makes total sense—it’s a natural human impulse, and you’ve been through a lot.

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yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 14/01/2026

Even worse news: the glass will eventually break and there's nothing we mortals can do about it.

yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 13/01/2026

My mom once told me that Dilbert seemed like the kind of thing I would like, and I didn't speak to her for a month.

yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 10/01/2026

I just added a little achar to my lentil soup, and it TOTALLY KICKED IT INTO HIGH GEAR. MY SOUP IS IN FOURTH GEAR NOW. NOT FIFTH GEAR, THAT WOULDN'T LEAVE ANY ROOM FOR IMPROVEMENT

yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 16/12/2025

Somewhere out there in the multiverse is a Pringles ad where the guy from the can shows off his gams while dancing to “One Pringular Sensation”

yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 09/12/2025

What kind of monster *covers* Wonderful Christmastime?

yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 14/11/2025

Ok, hear me out: The Andrews Sisters: Nazi Hunters

yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 11/11/2025

The best thing about Sydney Sweeney is that her name sounds like the proprietor of a goose fat factory in a Dickens novel.

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yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 05/11/2025

Why did I ever live Fort Greene (Because my landlord refused to do repairs and then paid me to move out and then I couldn't afford to live there anymore)

yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 05/11/2025

Sometimes it almost feels like the appropriate response to incipient fascism is not to move further to the right.

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yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 01/11/2025

Does Lisa Frankenstein count? If so, it was directed by Zelda Williams! If not, it was still directed by Zelda Williams.

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yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 04/10/2025

Every few months, I test each streamer I subscribe to. I visit it with arbitrary cancellation. If this is taken as sincere, and I am offered six months for just $1.99 per month, I judge that service harmless--I spare it. But if the Hand of Ming is recognized in these events, I unsubscribe utterly.

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yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 19/09/2025

Did you guys know that Baker Street isn't just the saxophone solo from Baker Street? There's, like, a whole song around it! And it doesn't sound very much like the saxophone solo of itself! This world is just so full of wonder.

yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 07/09/2025

What if the kid in big was body swapping with himself in the future? Such that at some point in his adult life, he became his younger self? That movie would be called Small: A Big Story, and it would go something like this: a-zo-zo-zo-zo, zooay

yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 06/09/2025

But if you call a kangaroo's tail a leg, it has five.

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Reposted by yer pal mumbles

ceej @ceej.online · 04/09/2025

malcolm gladwell has been a dipshit for 10,000 hours

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yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 29/08/2025

"It's funny in one respect" Mister, it is funny in none respects.

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yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 24/08/2025

Imagine being given the name Thomas Chatterton Williams and then actually going by Thomas Chatterton Williams. If it were me, I'd insist on being called T. C. "Bill" Williams.

yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 06/08/2025

What if the Butlerian Jihad was actually about people who preferred Ask Jeeves to AI chatbots?

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yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 30/07/2025

My favorite episode of the X-Files is the one where Mulder tries to watch an episode of the X-Files on a Monday. Guest starring Charles Nelson Reilly!

yer pal mumbles @thr.ax · 30/07/2025

There's hardly any everything on this bagel. It is, at best, a something bagel.