iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

Still, it felt like another acknowledgement of how our life has changed and what our limitations are, even though technically the only thing that changed is selling a car that had become a fancy lawn ornament.

020

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

This weekend we sold the car we've had since 2010. Took us through grad school, internship, residency, and moves up and down the east coast. But it didn't make sense to keep - most days we're not up for driving and we haven't been up for driving on a regular basis in a long, long while.

140

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Today is hard because we're realizing that our life is never going to be what it used to be and we can't imagine a future right now. 😮‍💨

030

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Trying to get any financial support when on disability is an uphill battle and it is exhausting. 🫠

120

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

There is a ton of grief around this anniversary because we have lost so much in the past year. But we are also endlessly grateful for what we have gained and the people in our life who have shown up when we needed them the most.

030

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

It was exactly a year ago today that things fully crumbled. We thought it was going to be a matter of weeks, maybe a few months, to pick up the pieces. A year later we're coming to terms with being disabled and having to figure out a whole new way of navigating the world.

140

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

Government officially agrees that we're disabled and that's been a lot to process. 😮‍💨

030

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 07/09/2026

These white walls and white lines Remind me of the bad times Alone with you in reverie Erase me, forget me

youtube.com

blackbear - toxic energy (Official Lyric Video)

YouTube video by blackbear

010

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

A chapter in and this book already has me in a chokehold. This is the religious trauma book I've been waiting for, clearly. 🙏

Picture of a book resting on a pillow that is a black heart with a ribcage on it. The book is titled The Dark In Her Veins and it is by M.K. Lobb. It has images of the two main characters, the MMC with white hair, piercings, and an open top that shows a neck and chest tattoo in black ink. The FMC has blonde hair and is draped from neck and arms in an outfit made of red and black.

040

Reposted by Onyx (Human Disaster)

Basil 🌱 @basil-mage.bsky.social · 28/08/2026

Autumn

Drawing of a puppy in a pile of leaves with the caption; "It's finally autism"

4686382164

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

This post is brought to you by watching friends wait to see if they got into 1996 and being like, "Man, that would've been my jam but is 110% not healthy for us right now." Very excited for them to get to have that experience, just wishing we could be in a place to have applied too.

020

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

One of the hardest things over the past year has been the realization that we're not in a place to engage with the content and themes in TTRPGs/LARPs that we used to love. We know that may change as we work on recovery but right now we need to be mindful of triggers and more cautious.

130

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

Got the plague, so we're watching let's plays of Alan Wake 2 and that's getting us wanting to write again.

020

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 29/08/2026

lol, also forgot the whole chronic migraines and vertigo piece too. Hard to remember every single way our body is betraying us these days.

030

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 29/08/2026

Chronic fatigue and pain, autistic burnout, and trauma symptoms make an exhausting combination to live with 🫠 We are so tired of being exhausted and drained all the time. Bonus points for the fun of trying to explain to disability why all of these factors make it impossible to work right now.

250

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 25/08/2026

Very done with today and it’s not even noon 😮‍💨

010

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 24/08/2026

It is starting to feel like autumn and we are ready 🙏

020

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 23/08/2026

A boy, sleeping on a Mothman blanket with a ribcage pillow beside him.

A picture of a white recliner with a Welcome to West Virginia Mothman blanket and a ribcage pillow. There is a cat curled up on the blanket, looking peaceful.

030

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 20/08/2026

Our name change went through the same day we saw MCR and if that isn't fated to be, we don't know what is. 🖤

030

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 19/08/2026

Saw MCR last night in DC and everything about the show was incredibly healing 🙏

Picture of Onyx and Mack. Onyx is wearing a black parade tank top with a rainbow flag. They have on tinted glasses and a baseball cap and some of their tattoos are visible. There is a black chain collar around their neck. Mack's shirt is not fully visible.

180

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 12/08/2026

Going dark for the foreseeable future. Catch y'all on the flipside.

140

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 11/08/2026

Feeling so much grief as the upcoming anniversary approaches. I didn't know that barely a month later everything would fall apart and a year later, people I shared a beautiful memory with would no longer be a part of my life.

140

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 09/08/2026

It's been almost a year since things fully crumbled and that's hard to sit with. There has been so much loss and grief and old trauma resurfacing and new trauma happening. We're definitely in a better place than we were but there is still so much further to go and some days that feels exhausting.

040

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 08/08/2026

I'm so tired of being tired. 😮‍💨

050

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 04/08/2026

🫠 Today sucks. I'd say "I'm going back to bed" but my body's decided that sleep is impossible so...

030

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 31/07/2026

Trying to come to terms with the limitations from being mentally ill, chronically ill, and (currently at least) disabled is exhausting. 😮‍💨

040

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 27/07/2026

Pulled four major arcana in our tarot reading this morning and we're sure that's completely fine... 🙃

120

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 20/07/2026

Today is a hard day and everything is feeling raw. There is so much grief and it is hard to hold.

130

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 18/07/2026

Every day we get a little more feral and a little hotter ✌️

Picture of Onyx who is wearing a My Chemical Romance tank top that shows off a few of their tattoos (one flesh one end on the chest, a partial word and bird on the left arm). They are wearing a black metal permanent collar. They have an eyebrow piercing and a helix that is filled with a spiky arch.

Picture of Onyx who is dressed in a MCR tank top and part of their one flesh one end tattoo is visible. They are wearing a black metal permanent collar. They have a stud in their nose for the new piercing.

040

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 18/07/2026

Spent years posting this semi-jokingly, only to discover over the past year that it is unfortunately very true. Nothing like discovering that you are just one walking trauma response. 🙃

140

Reposted by Onyx (Human Disaster)

💖 Birdhism Jen @birdhism.com · 17/07/2026

For real. #noai #art

48113933227

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 17/07/2026

Over here begging and pleading for creativity and inspiration to return. Autistic burnout and trauma symptoms are sucking the life out of any creative spark.

150

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 11/07/2026

Had to get an emergency root canal today, so that's where we're at. 🙃

111

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 08/07/2026

Good vibes worked! Sid is back home and feeling much better. 🖤

030

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 07/07/2026

Our family needs some good vibes and well wishes today. 😮‍💨 Our elderly cat is at the emergency vet and things are not looking great in terms of prognosis.

260

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 28/06/2026

A weekend in the mountains, in a city made for me? Don't mind if I yes.

Image of an Evil Dead pinball machine. It is all in purple and blue glowing lights. There is the Deadite in the basement on top of the machine and Ash and his chainsaw on the score board.

Mural on the window of a movies, video games, books store. It is the red room from Twin Peaks and has David Lynch holding a cup of coffee. The Twin Peaks font reads, "A damn fine cup of coffee."

060

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 26/06/2026

Time for the next phase. Wish us luck.

020

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 24/06/2026

Catching up on social media and I saw this. I miss both of those characters (and those games) too. 🫂

020

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 16/06/2026

It's been really hard to come to terms with the fact that many of the fears I had were true. Out of sight, out of mind. The moment you stop doing things for people, they decide you're dead to them. The moment you slow down, everything crumbles. 2025 and 2026 have been sadly illuminating.

050

Onyx (Human Disaster) @thekilljoyz.bsky.social · 14/06/2026

Drinking Christmas in Paris tea at an unseasonable time? Don't mind if we do. 🍵

030