iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 05/10/2026

I am in full angry goose meme mode today with every headline. "Hastert, former House Speaker who was convicted over a hush-money scheme," WHAT WAS HE HUSHING? WHAT WAS THE HUSH MONEY COVERING UP, MOTHERFUCKER?

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

#MysteryWrestling understands precisely what it is, and why. It's comedy wrestling done by people who can work, sell and be naturally entertaining. It's increasingly insane match concepts. Special guests, great use of locals wherever they go, angle payoffs and no DQs/run-ins unless they're FUNNY.

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 03/10/2026

If you see this, post a not-quite Star Trek

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

Aaron Nola is in full postseason form, I see

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

If you see this, post a vampire that isn't Dracula. Every vampire thread needs a lesbian vampire who sneaks out of grandfather clocks in the dead of night to prevent marriage consummations.

Isolde, _The Shiver of the Vampires_, by Jean Rollin, the king of early 70s lesbian Eurotrash vampsploitation.

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

In honor of Truth and Reconciliation Day, some absolute truth

from the Non-Adventures of Wonderella webcomic, distilled absolute truth -- Sledgehammer was about Peter Gabriel's DICK!

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

The Philadelphia Phillies, some have come to say, might be dogshit garbage

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

I have determined that "Hocus Pocus" by Focus, specifically the live version they played at time-and-a-half speed, is the finest song that can and should be played on American radio, and anyone who does not know or adore the song sufficiently should be deported. Thanks, -- The Management

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

For those hung up on the song debate du jour, here's a thought exercise for you. Go back to when you were twelve years old and look up the Billboard Top 40 list for this week in that year. How much of it do you recognize? How much of it would you download TODAY and play more than once?

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

You'd probably get banned from the stadium for life for doing it, but I'm surprised nobody in CBP tonight had a sign like BILL GILES COULDN'T WATCH ANY MORE OF THIS

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

Realmuto just tested positive for batsticular cancer. He should definitely get that checked out after the game.

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Looked up this year's vaccine prices for the uninsured and indepedent contractors among us. CVS: Flu $99, COVID $280 Costco: Flu $22, COVID $140 This year's CVS Rage Meter Status: Chartreuse

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

If the Phillies don't make the playoffs, are fans going to run Trea Turner out of town with literal torches and pitchforks, or just try to nail him to something

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

I am not and likely never will be Jewish, but having heard about the fate of Sunkist Fruit Gems, I am driving nails through a baseball bat as I speak

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

INTERVIEWER: Is that... an iced coffee I see? ME: No, it's not a beverage. I saw a muddy puddle with a bunch of severed rabbit testicles in it on my way in, so I scooped some up to take home. INTERVIEWER: Ah, good. For a moment, I thought you were some kind of deviant. RFK JR.: What'd I miss?

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

If I am interviewing someone and I see that they have brought an iced coffee, I have my secretary bring over an entire pot straight from the burner. I pour it all into my crotch, my expression unchanging, my eyes locked upon the interviewee's. "You have forgotten the face of your father," I intone

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

As rough as Penix looks tonight, he's at least a droplet of hope. He's one bad knee tweak away from the Falcons potentially going 0-17 this year. Maybe finding a way to go -1 - 18

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

Probably only going to go see You Can See Everything in theaters if I know the SHE'S SHOWIN' FOOT yeller will be there too

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

Speaking of comic books, back when Hollywood was determined to put Alan Moore's output on the big screen by any means possible, I consider it a VERY missed opportunity that we didn't get at least a three-picture Axel Pressbutton saga

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

A couple of thoughts on the #Miracleman hubbub. For one thing, it's very doubtful that this is the same Miracleman from Moore's Warrior / Eclipse stories. Same power template, powers that had been INTENDED for an E-6160 Mike Moran, but this is a dimensional counterpart at best.

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

If I had a time machine, I would send Salvador Dali back to prehistoric times so that his cave paintings could baffle the shit out of both cavemen and modern paleontologists

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

if you and your wife are both over the age of eighty, you should probably no longer need to be told that thawing frozen ground beef in a room temperature sink for twelve hours is a HORRIFIC FUCKING IDEA

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

Let me know when Tilly Norwood gets 'interviewed' and grows a third ear in the middle of her forehead, flings poo around, and starts reciting filthy limericks

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

Ordinarily, when one of the Pope's balls is huge and bright green, they at least convene an ecumenical council

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

ADVISOR: Mr. President, you don't understand. Hating 'globalists' doesn't mean we don't want trade with any other nations! It's a dogwhistle for 'we don't like Jews and we don't want them here.' You keep getting it wrong. STEPHEN MILLER: Why not both?

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

live footage of Trump watching the Fed interest rate announcement

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Reposted by delfin

Grant Brisbee @grantbrisbee.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

hearing some chatter that this might be "the song of the summer of the fall"

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

Kash Patel UNDERSTANDS that sometimes when a nuke is in play and hundreds of thousands of Californian lives are in danger, Jack Bauer simply MUST suck off an animal to extract needed information and NO JURY WOULD CONVICT.

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

When asked by CNN about his condition, Mitch McConnell opened his mouth wide and a stream of live mice flowed out.

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Reposted by delfin

Kathryn Salamander: Witches' Road or bust 🎃 @transsalamander.bsky.social · 12/09/2026

I think folks can on some level intuit what's going on here, but it's important to spell it out too: UK transphobes who think themselves left of center believe trans people are cis people who simply need to stop being trans. It very easily squares the circle for them and lets them sleep at night.

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

...Houthi Sapperticker? I'll get me coat

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 10/09/2026

There's a handy guide as to whether you will ever receive money from Trump's $5000 if-we-win bribe offer.

Peter Griffin Color Chart.

Caucasian tones: Won't get the check
Non-Caucasian tones: REALLY won't get the check

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 10/09/2026

Live your life in a way so that when you're gone, one of your most prominent legacies isn't generally-well-meaning people finding hundreds of ways to celebrate and mock your gaping neck wound. Note that I didn't say "stop."

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 07/09/2026

TRUMP: Just look at my beautiful new map. Costa del Trump, Donaldsville, Trumpian Ocean, Ericsburg... Ericsburg? ERIC: Miss Natalie, she's got her own place. TRUMP: Ericsburg? ERIC: It's a little bitty place! TRUMP: ERICSBURG?? ERIC: Okay, I'll just wipe it off, that's all. Just a little town.

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

Ah, now I see Farage's strategy. Deflect attention away from investigation of the financial scandals that caused the Binface by-election by participating in a different, even more undeniable financial scandal!

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

Post something random or you'll have an awful September

Helpful chart for prostate examination on an Ewok.

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

There are many arguments against the next eventual Dem POTUS simply going scorched earth, demolishing all the constructed atrocities, renaming everything, barrelling full speed ahead and daring both SCOTUS and Congress to stop him. But running on "that, exactly" would win by twenty.

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 30/08/2026

Introduce yourself with 10 acts or bands you've seen live... King Missile Debbie Gibson No Doubt The Dead Milkmen Beru Revue (and Beru Ha Ha) The Living End The Moody Blues Mojo Nixon Blink-182 Kenny Rogers (with Gallagher as his opening act)

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 29/08/2026

Alright, if you're not from #delco you can probably mute this whole thread, but I am having an existential pizza crisis here. Something from my childhood just crept up and bit me on the ass.

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 29/08/2026

I am pleased that I have finally found a local Chinese restaurant that understands that when I select "Hot & Spicy" when online ordering, I do not mean "American Hot & Spicy," but rather "Destroy the white devil."

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 28/08/2026

When I went to school in the Carolinas, my fellow Yankee friends and I held a brief conference. We decided that guys from Philly and New England should only consciously use the word "y'all" as part of the phrase "y'all motherfuckers." Motion carried.

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

I took a quick look at Google Maps and now it says "Check your lease, pal, you're living in Fuck Lake"

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

BREAKING: The majority of the world's governments have agreed to change the Atlantic Ocean's name to the Short-Fingered Vulgarian Ocean

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 26/08/2026

Sadly, the Rule of Three holds as usual. In the category of "good-humored campy entertainers who looked right at home next to Muppets," Gong Show staple Jaye P. Morgan has joined Dolly and Tim.

Jaye P. Morgan on the Muppet Show, face-to-face with Kermit.

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 26/08/2026

Thinking on Dolly. The great author Joseph Heller was at a billionaire hedge fund owner's party with Kurt Vonnegut. Vonnegut remarked that the host made more money that day than Catch-22 ever would. Heller smiled and said "I have something that he'll never have - the knowledge that I have enough."

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 25/08/2026

I am quietly amazed that a misfiring laser hasn't yet left the letters TRU burned into the surface of the moon.

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 22/08/2026

If you see this, we implore you to post a picture from whatever device you're using without explanation.

Big Tits Potato Chips, 10c. Manufactured by Tart-Chestnut, Dunn, NC.

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 22/08/2026

If a younger, blonder bimbette was muscling in on the orange one, Melania would certainly... er... not give the slightest fuck about that, so that checks out

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delfin @thedelfinclutch.bsky.social · 21/08/2026

I want at least one of these LLWS teams to be full of just utter little unapologetic degenerates. Have the blurb say "Favorite movie: Pink Flamingos"

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