iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

One of my regular Trader Joe’s did a remodel and changed the layout of the store. Thank you for respecting my privacy during this time.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Unlocked new parenting level tonight: deciphering hangry 8yo’s Taco Bell Order from a rudimentary understanding of Taco Bell options.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

Living near a park with two kids and dog is great, except for the part it takes us 10 minutes to walk there and three business days to get back.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 23/08/2026

Apparently 3rd grade is when I’m no longer allowed to give clothing advice.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 20/08/2026

Rule #1 of car seat installation: it must be at least 80F outside.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 14/08/2026

“Grab me the duck because he’s very famous and he LOVES doing hair.” #kidsoutofcontext

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 27/07/2026

8yo: Pretend I’m a bunny and you’re adopting me from the shelter. Me: Aw! Sweet bunny. Look, her name is Truffle! 8yo: That is not a girl name. Name me a food that’s a girl name.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 15/07/2026

8yo: I don’t like those lunchboxes you picked out. Except that one. Me: Ok, you can be in charge of cleaning that one whenever you need a lunchbox. 8yo: Wait. Actually, they’re all good! —— Amazing how that happened.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 11/07/2026

Getting into a foam pit nearing 40.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 10/07/2026

Nothing snaps you out of your thoughts faster than your toddler and “Bicycle, bench!”

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 04/07/2026

Listening to The Music Man because nothing says America like a grifter coming to town and having beef with the librarian.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 03/07/2026

The toddler is toddlering so hard today.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 27/06/2026

Finally heard those three precious words every parent longs to hear, “Mama, go night-night”.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 24/06/2026

8yo: Daddy, I found a new sport we can do. It’s called, like, BASE jumping. 🤷🏼‍♀️

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 16/06/2026

At the conference less than three hours and I have rotisserie chicken on my badge.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 14/06/2026

Me to 1yo: I gotta go fold the rest of your clothes, baby. 1yo: Baby?!

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Reposted by Cait

arr @arr.bsky.social · 05/06/2026

english isn't for cowards. if you're not saying 'torpify,' that's a skill issue. there's no Académie Française telling you what to do. if you try to type 'pallific' and freak out when you see a little red underline, maybe you're not ready to roll with the big dogs.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 25/05/2026

This is a fun time as parents to a toddler acquiring language: Clock doesn’t have an “l” Cup has a “ck” instead of a “p” Fork doesn’t have an “r”

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 23/05/2026

Me at preschool drop off: Just so you know, we hung up a new clock at home and 1yo is very intent on repeating the word. Teacher: Ok…? Me: But her version doesn’t have the “l” in it yet. Figured you’d want the heads up as she might walk around shouting it all day.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 22/05/2026

Saw a bunch of people in the theater lobby dressed in robes and carrying light sabers. I’m a little embarrassed because I didn’t realize we were all dressing up for The Sheep Detectives.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 20/05/2026

Nothing quite prepares you for the moment a two year old approaches you and clearly says, “the music is not playing because the phone is having trouble connecting with the speaker.”

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 14/05/2026

Fresh goldfish crackers lovingly packed in my toddler’s pristine bento box for school: Untouched. Stale goldfish crackers she finds shoved into her car seat after three weeks: Wow! Mama! See! Snack! *immediately shoves into her face*

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 09/05/2026

Flight crew: Ladies and gentlemen, we’re now making our final descent. Please stow tray tables and return seatbacks to their upright positions. Remember, in the event of an emergency landing, do not bring any personal belongings with you. —— We’re all just gonna be chill about that last sentence? 😳

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 06/05/2026

Overheard at Disney: My elbows are sweating. (I overheard it coming out of my mouth)

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 04/05/2026

Never been wasted at the Magic Kingdom before, but I think it might happen

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 23/04/2026

Dismayed to report yet again I made a phone call that solved my problem.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 02/04/2026

I’m convinced people who make “quick kid hairstyles for when you’re running late” content are the same people who suggest I can have dinner on the table in 15 minutes when the recipe involves finely dicing at least three kinds of vegetables.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 30/03/2026

Inexplicable parenting math: Packing one kid lunch take five minutes. Packing two kid lunches takes twenty. Packing two kid lunches and a parent lunch takes an infinite amount of time. Do not attempt.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 27/03/2026

Are you legally required to adopt corgis in pairs?

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 20/03/2026

8yo: What’s it called on a show where lots of stuff happens and maybe people cry or are really excited? Is that…umm…drama? I like that. Drama! *hand flourishes from booster seat*

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 14/03/2026

Toddler snoozed for a 10 minute car ride so now does not need sleep until 2028.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 07/03/2026

8yo: It’s weird that in K-pop Demon Hunters an adult is wearing pants with teddy bears and choo choo trains. Me: Would it be weird if I did that? 8: You wear Muppet shirts, so no.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 04/03/2026

No, that 1800Flowers bouquet is not called “Large Bush Arrangement”. That’s the waking up at 4:30am and coffee talking.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 10/02/2026

Me: *Hyperventilating from a coughing fit.* Teams: You are muted.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 07/02/2026

I was not prepared for Kazakhstan’s speed skating uniforms.

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Reposted by Cait

Patrick Monahan @pattymo.com · 05/02/2026

Adobe Acrobat I do not want to know What’s New. I do not want to turn my PDF into a podcast with my team. I want to look at the PDF. Please stop

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 05/02/2026

Do something for your soul tonight and watch The Muppet Show.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 05/02/2026

“You just received 5+ messages from your friend. Summarize with AI?” Yeah! Because the last thing I want to do with my time is hear thoughts, hopes, dreams, jokes, and struggles from people I like. What makes relationships meaningful is how quickly I can process them.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 16/01/2026

“What the heck? It is NOT always a good time! This song isn’t real.” -Felicity on Owl City and Carly Rae Jepsen’s “Good Time”

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 11/01/2026

7yo: We’re probably going to be two minutes late because of the traffic. Me: No. Probably because you were dressing up your bear when I told you to get ready. 7yo: That’s what I meant; I’m the traffic. 😉.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 09/01/2026

Me: I saw “Eternity” yesterday. My boss: Really? How long did it take to watch it? Me:

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 01/01/2026

Seems my youngest has been named appropriately.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 29/12/2025

Couldn’t figure out why I was getting so irritated wearing my jacket at work today until I figured out it’s because I’ve become accustomed to the giant bathrobe lifestyle.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 28/12/2025

Do I need to rethink every decision I’ve made for the last 15 years or did the toddler just need to go to bed at 5pm, but you can’t put a toddler to bed at 5pm so you just spent two hours crashing out as a family? #HolidayCheer

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 27/12/2025

7yo: Can we go to the store tomorrow? There are such cute dolls that are NOT rip-their-heads-off dolls!

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 25/12/2025

Headphones for your second grader’s iPad are really a gift for the parents.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 24/12/2025

Me on 12/22: No childcare for the next two weeks, but the toddler’s been napping so well and consistently I should still get plenty of work done! Toddler on 12/22: Guess what I hate now?

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Reposted by Cait

Raysident Evil @sireviscerate.myatproto.social · 24/12/2025

And Tiny Tim, who did NOT die, was present at the end of the universe, having witnessed every black hole evaporate and every proton decay. Even so, Death would not come.

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Cait @swimmercait.bsky.social · 09/12/2025

7yo: Mama, draw a girl. The best one you can do. Me: I’m not very good at drawing. 7yo: Don’t be so negative! Me: Awww! I’ll try. *draws picture* 7yo: ……um. Ok.

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