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Stuart Walton

@stuartwalton.bsky.social
154 followers 230 following 909 posts

AKA Tiger_Walts 🐦 @StuartIWalton

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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 3h
When you down the last of your tea only to discover that the bag had split
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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
On DVD specifically, I don't actually recall but it was one of: - Akira - Ninja Scroll - Dead Leaves
Dead Leaves
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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Just be glad that the meta-verse is failing otherwise we get the ProctoProd(TM) pixelframe.design/cyberpunk-20...
"It's all here." LeMat waved the manual nervously. "The note from MDE Trademarks and Legal. They decided Sacroiliac Neural Induction Device was too much of a mouthful, and SNID was a stupid acronym." He tried another weak grin.

TAP. TAP. TAP.

"So they decided to find a new name. Convened focus groups, the whole bit. And they finally came up with one they liked."

TAP. TAP. TAP.

"They call it the ProctoProd(TM), Jack."

My foot froze in mid-air. "The what?"

"That's how it works." LeMat gulped, took a deep breath, took a long good stare at it, and then looked me straight in the eye and nodded.

"You stick it up your ass and dance, Jack."
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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Don't you just love searching for obscure Australian hip-hop acts from 2 decades ago
Warning, this text is long.

Search: Frangipani and the Floating Circus of Lights

Response: The air in the port of Oakhaven always smelled of salt and rotten kelp, but tonight, it carried the scent of roasted almonds and ozone. Frangipani adjusted her leather tool belt, her fingers brushing against the cold steel of her favorite wrench. She stood at the edge of the pier, watching the horizon ignite.Out of the fog crept the Floating Circus of Lights.It wasn't a single ship, but a mismatched armada of dozens of vessels linked by glowing, neon-threaded tightropes. Massive hot-air balloons, tethered to the decks, levitated platforms high into the misty air. Lanterns of every color imaginable—amethyst, mint green, blazing tangerine—bobbed in the wakes of the ships.Frangipani had spent her whole life fixing steam engines and clockwork toys in her father’s cramped shop, but she had never seen machinery like this. The circus didn't just use steam; it seemed to harness the northern lights themselves."They're looking for a mechanic," a voice grunted behind her. It was old Barnaby, the harbor master, chewing on an unlit pipe. "The Main Stage barge is sputtering. If they don't fix the central dynamo by midnight, the whole show goes dark, and the ships drift apart."Frangipani didn't need to be told twice. She grabbed her satchel, leaped onto the nearest transport skiff, and paid the rower three copper coins.As the skiff neared the grand center barge, the scale of the circus became overwhelming. High above, acrobats clad in shimmering silver suits swung between the moving balloons, their bodies cutting through beams of colored light. Fire-breathers exhaled plumes of sapphire flame that danced across the water. Yet, beneath the music and the roaring crowd, Frangipani’s practiced ears caught a dangerous rhythm: a heavy, metallic thud-clack, thud-clack that meant a piston was about to throw a rod.She... Wow, you got to the end, there was about 600 more words of this by the way.
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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
"Where's my Danish?"
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fesshole 🧻 @fesshole.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
I work at a library that still issues fines to kids and teens for late books. I don't fine them. Because it's ridiculous to give a child a negative experience of books, & equally ridiculous to punish students for working hard. I always make the fines disappear from their account.
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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Share a random movie GIF! 🎥 🖤
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EGVroom @egvroom.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Here’s some off-screen ZERO gameplay on real hardware 👾 #pixelart #indiedev #gameboy #gbstudio #retrogaming #GBDK2020
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Boo Mario @tomatograndpa.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
Clue- I mean, what can I say here? It's a perfect movie. Perfect script, perfect cast. It's a stacked cast and of course Tim Curry stands at the forefront. What a talent, what a legacy. I think I could watch this movie every day and never get tired of it. They just don't make them like this anymore.
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Boo Mario @tomatograndpa.bsky.social · 16/08/2026
Angel Heart- Now THIS is a movie. A gripping occult noir, dripping with atmosphere and brimming with gorgeous shots. Rourke and DeNiro deliver phenomenal performances. A real joy from start to finish and a must-watch for Silent Hill fans given its obvious (and cited) influence on the series
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Boo Mario @tomatograndpa.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Lair of the White Worm- Truly one of the best movies for freaks ever made. An absolute blast from start to finish. Bisexual snake women, weaponized bagpipes, Hugh Grant bisecting people with a broadsword....and on top of all of that Amanda Donahoe delivering an all-timer performance. A perfect film.
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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
I used to drink Mitchell's Lancaster Bomber at this small table when it lived in the Royal Hotel at Heysham. Back then it still had the gimballed compass in the middle.
A small round table with a can of beer and a glass.

Under the glass is a map of Morecambe Bay. There is a see-thru section in the middle where a compass used to live.
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Otto von Biz Markie @donachaidh.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Lol my buddy just sent me another angle and it's somehow even more ridiculous
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Paul Byrne @theplanetaryguy.com · 09/09/2026
Astrophotographer Adam (AJ) Smadi caught this image a few hours ago from Washington state. A thin crescent Moon, sunlight illuminating the rugged lunar surface. And 2,400 times farther away—and on the other side of the Sun—mighty Jupiter, and its moons Io (left) and Ganymede (right).
A crescent Moon seen during the day, arcing from upper left to lower right of the frame. At lower centre is the full disk of Jupiter; the small dots to its upper left and lower right and Io and Ganymede, respectively.
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Sarah Andersen @sarahseeandersen.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
The image is of a four panel comic.
In the first panel we see a dragon sitting on a pile of treasure. A speech bubble pointing off panel reads, “Dragon, why do you have all this treasure?”
In the second panel we zoom in on the dragons face. He simply says “shiny”.
In the third panel we pan to the left and see that there is a crow standing next to the dragon on the treasure.
In the fourth panel we zoom in on the crows face. He says “hell yeah”.
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Guilherme Nunes @guilhernunes.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
Hamsters trying a delicious sunflower seed sushi from the new local restaurant.
Painting of two hamsters eating a boat of sushi in a restaurant with plants behind them.
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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
Commuting on a class 1XX DMU is certainly better than on a Pacer
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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
It's a bit windy
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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Ex-teacher Greg Davies reading from a Would I Lie to You? card
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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
Jolene was requested last night at my gig! Dolly Parton never had any trouble with that C# but trust me, this song is HARD.
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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Victor von Doom amid a swirl of green miasma.
Bathroom: I wouldn't go in there for a while, I tried the air freshener but it just made things worse
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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
If you see this, post your getaway vehicle.
static.klipy.com
Monkey Magic Summon: Gone Like The Wind
Alt: The irrepressible Monkey summons his pink cloud
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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
"Look at how they yassacred my boy"
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The Rt Hon Jess Phillips MP @supermickychow.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
This is beautiful. A walkable, 3D city built entirely from ASCII characters in a custom engine. Incredible work tbh youtu.be/3YtygAx_C6A?...
youtu.be
A Walkable ASCII Cyberpunk City in One HTML File
YouTube video by Grow Now! Games
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WooooOoOooOendy 👻 @wednesdaygj.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
Bottle of Buckie jumping on the Moquette trend.
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Quantum Sheep @quantumsheep.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
This is "Places I've Never Been" - my first ever single, and my first actual 'song', with human lyrics and singing and stuff. distrokid.com/hyperfollow/... Play it loud and have a little dance :) Thanks for listening! *sheepyhugs* #spotify #bandcamp #AppleMusic #youtube #newmusic
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Gleam Programming Language @gleam.run · 19/08/2026
Did you know? @ucberkeleyofficial.bsky.social has added #Gleamlang to it's CS course!
Graphic with "Did you know... Berkeley University is now using Gleam for one of its Computer Science courses?" and a smiling pink star holding an envelope with a light bulb
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Gleam News @gleam-news.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
I promise to bring new Gleam stickers 👀 Also, there are free tickets available: - diversity programme (in-person and virtual tickets) - students programme by @theerlef.bsky.social (virtual tickets) - I know about some upcoming additional giveaway for in-person tickets, details on Gleam's discord 🔜
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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
Six? What are they: up, down, strange, charm, bottom and top? I very much doubt this is gluon-free.
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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
Strange Jigsaws - I don't remember there being anything to eat, unless pictures of fruit on paperboard count.
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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
Foo Fighters - Foo Fighters
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Simone de Rochefort @doomquasar.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
screaming screaming and screaming into the void! thatshubham.com/blog/news-au...
thatshubham.com
The 49MB Web Page
A look at modern news websites. How programmatic ad-tech, huge payloads and hostile architecture destroyed the reading experience.
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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
I am on the fancy bus from Keswick. Padded seats, USB, and a personal light.
The back of a bus seat. It has technology.
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Pᴜʀᴇ Dᴇᴀᴅ Gᴀᴍɪɴɢ @puredeadgaming.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
The results of the video I posted earlier was this iconic shot 👏 Danny León and his crew smashed it.
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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
I like to think the bear filed the original complaint, because then it would be: Extrought, pursued by a bear
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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
Of course the clouds arrive right now
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Cats of Yore @catsofyore.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
KNEEL BEFORE TOPSEY. Postcard from my collection, 1907.
Black and white photo of a very fluffy longhaired grey kitten, sitting up looking so perfectly chonky and friendly. The name Topsey is written beneath the photo, and “Copyright 1907 by H.I. Robbins”. A bow has been painted onto the image to make appear as if Topsey is wearing a ribbon that ties in front.
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REwadent Evil @ewacat.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
i got told off the other week in the middle of Hammersmith for smiling at the dog and not the owner
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poorly drawn cats @poorlycatdraw.bsky.social · 10/08/2026
preparing for takeoff
poorly drawn cat wagging its tail, with motion lines around itan orange cat standing on a concrete floor and looking up at the camera while wagging its tail, which appears blurred from movement
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ΜΑΝΟΣ ΤΡΑΧΙΑΣ™ @trahias.bsky.social · 08/08/2026
Xu Ziqi (Chinese Artist, born 2000) "Raccoon Slave Shadow-3", 2022. Color on Silk, 36 × 25 cm. Private Collection. #art #painting #artist #BlueSkyArt #caturday #catlover
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ΜΑΝΟΣ ΤΡΑΧΙΑΣ™ @trahias.bsky.social · 08/08/2026
Georg Anton Rasmussen (Norwegian, 1842–1914) "Fjord Landscape", 1898. Oil on Canvas, 87 × 63.5 cm. Private Collection. #art #painting #artist #BlueSkyArt
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Stuart Walton @stuartwalton.bsky.social · 06/08/2026
Bond villain, wrong answers only
static.klipy.com
Frank Spencer Some Mothers Do Ave Em
Alt: Frank Spencer from Some Mothers Do Ave Em exclaiming 'You could have had my eye out'
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By Cory Doctorow (GPG 0xBF3D9110957E5F4C) @doctorow.pluralistic.net · 06/08/2026
I'm sure that working in social media - dealing with people as mass statistical abstractions - is a cognitohazard, the sort of thing that could make anyone a little solipsistic, convinced that everyone else is a kind of stimulus-responding automaton lacking the interiority that you experience. 1/
A medieval siege engine, tended by gnome-sized purple figures. Around it are several human-like figures with robot heads, clad in medieval garb. Their legs are missing, tapering off into nothingness. The giant floating head of Mark Zuckerberg's metaverse avatar overlooks the scene. Each of the robot people is being closely observed by a distorted, grotesque version of Zuckerberg's avatar head.
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Sarah Andersen @sarahseeandersen.bsky.social · 05/08/2026
The image is of a four panel comic.
Panel one shows a giraffe tripping on a rock. The giraffe says “woop” as it stumbles.
Panel two zooms in on the giraffe’s face. The giraffe is sweating in embarrassment. We see a thought bubble above the giraffe. The text within the thought bubble reads, “that was embarrassing.”
The third panel shows the giraffe closing its eyes and munching on leaves reassuringly. The thought bubble above the giraffe reads, “but no one will remember.”
The fourth and final panel pans to an elephant staring at the giraffe from behind some bushes.
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ΜΑΝΟΣ ΤΡΑΧΙΑΣ™ @trahias.bsky.social · 04/08/2026
Peter H. Harskamp (Dutch Artist, born 1951) "Woman in Red with desperate Cat", Oil on Canvas, 80 × 100 cm. Private Collection. #art #painting #artist #BlueSkyArt
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Brawlcats @brawlcats.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
airbnb I’m staying at unintentionally created the toughest punk album cover of 2027
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alex! @atctwo.net · 01/08/2026
got a new thermal receipt printer? don't know what to do with it? try printing a live feed of the atproto firehose! you certainly won't regret printing a live feed of the atproto firehose
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Lindsay Fickas @lindsayfickas.bsky.social · 01/08/2026
Espresso chocolate sourdough
Sourdough crumb
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Sarah Andersen @sarahseeandersen.bsky.social · 01/08/2026
The image is of a four panel comic.
The first panel shows Sarah, the protagonist, as a child. Off panel, someone says to her, “Enjoy your youth!”
The second panel shows child Sarah again, now frowning. The person off panel continues, saying “After you’re 30 you’ll be old and your life will basically be over.”
Before the last two panels there is text that reads “LIFE AFTER I TURNED 30.”
The third panel shows adult Sarah opening a door.
The fourth panel shows the door opens to a beautiful field with flowers, a rainbow, and a pond. Sarah says “Wait what.”
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Jim Cummings @jimmycthatsme.bsky.social · 08/02/2025
This is the hardest I’ve laughed in a long time.
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