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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 19/07/2026

well a stoat contains both blood and oil

How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 13/04/2026

oh! huh! there were a lot of digits so I had just copied them to my calculator but I may have missed that final zero! recalculating it I got 1.19 gigastoats

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 13/04/2026

A standard stoat is 13.4 inches long, so I just had to convert the miles to inches!

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Semi-feral Post Monger @dwaynefuhlhage.bsky.social · 22/02/2025

Did you know that you are living in a dream world and that the metric system and imperial units are a lie? It's time you wake up and learn about Stoats as Units of Measure #2025MMM #SmelltheStoats #StoatsasMeasure #MightyMustelids

A diagram by Princess Pricklepants explaining how the humble stoat can be applied as a unit of measure to everything from the speed of 737 airplanes and the thrust produced by its engines. This was a simpler time when it was assumed that Boeing still knew how to build aircraft that stayed in the air and that there weren't SpaceX dweebs running the FAA

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 12/04/2026

119,512,091 stoatlengths, which I would concisely round to 120 megastoatlengths

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Katie Hinde @mammalssuck.bsky.social · 02/04/2026

Nile Crocodile swims several whale-lengths, ~200 stoat-lengths, ahead of Humpback Whale intrigued by something ahead... #2026MMM

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 02/04/2026

It's been a stoatal pleasure converting #StoatsAsMeasurement again for #2026MMM, love you all a stoatload!

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Katie Hinde @mammalssuck.bsky.social · 31/03/2026

That wildebeest mass drowning delivery of nutrients into the landscape is the biomass equivalent of ~40 Humpback Whale carcasses or 6.5 MILLION DEAD STOATS #StoatsAsUnitOfMeasurement #2026MMM marckissel.shinyapps.io/Stoat/

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 27/03/2026

as soon as I saw the picture I thought of Milo :3

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 27/03/2026

That's half as many teeth as a stoat's upper jaw! The lower jaw has 18, for a total of 34 #StoatsAsMeasurement #2026MMM

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 27/03/2026

despite our affinity for standard measurements, we cannot begin to quantify the joy of stoatistics #2026MMM

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Marc Kissel @marckissel.bsky.social · 24/03/2026

Southern Grasshopper Mouse, having feasted on the whip scorpion has continued actively hunting the Red Rock Canyon National Conservation Area when #MMMagic translocates mouse to the Picacho Mtns, about 500 miles away (or 2.36 million stoat lengths) #2026MMM #2026MMM

a prominent peak breaks up the hily desert floor that has a lot of cacti!

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 24/03/2026

Stoat body temperature is 39-40 degrees C, but since they're warm-blooded, they can maintain activity at a wide range of temperatures, and due to their high metabolism, must go out to hunt in any weather #StoatsAsMeasurement #2026MMM

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 24/03/2026

uhhh... 4,000 nautical miles is 21.8 megastoatlengths? (21,788,235.29)

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 24/03/2026

Despite not being a flying animal, "attack by surprise in flight" is an option rarely available to stoats #StoatsAsMeasurement #2026MMM youtu.be/lMnjhxsm-Gc

youtu.be

Extraordinary: Weasel rides on woodpecker's back - BBC News

YouTube video by BBC News

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Lara Durgavich @ldurgavich.bsky.social · 20/03/2026

Elephant pauses briefly & glances in Oryx's direction. Calm & unbothered, he sways his trunk & continues to eat the rain-soaked vegetation. Mealtime for an elephant can last 17-19 hours a day as it consumes 150-200kg (~900 stoats ) of plants. (Vancuylenberg 1977) #StoatsAsMeasurement #2026MMM

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 20/03/2026

136 kilostoats, 8.82 stoatlengths on that wingspan Stoats are unsurprisingly graceful and acrobatic, and they also produce milk #stoatsasmeasurement #2026mmm

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 20/03/2026

886 stoats Stoats have short jaws built for piercing spines. You could say they rely on displays for predation #stoatsasmeasurement #2026mmm

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 19/03/2026

You can still let weasels drool on you, but you should not depend on it for insulin!

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 19/03/2026

In fact, as a mustelid converter, we direct all inquiries about medicines disputed by Secretary Kennedy to mustelid vaccine expert @sailorrooscout.bsky.social

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 19/03/2026

we do not endorse nor trust any statistics or advice from the current Secretary of Health and Human Services and cannot convert any of them to stoats. get all your vaccines!

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 19/03/2026

Admittedly I did not research this one, but I had a gut feeling a search for "stoat saliva diabetes drug" would not yield any results. But science is cool like that sometimes so I left room for error in my answer!

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 19/03/2026

I do not recommend replacing any of your physician-prescribed medications with weasel drool.

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 19/03/2026

Stoats eat very often, and they also consume 1/3 of their body mass (albeit over 24 hours) #2026mmm #stoatsasmeasurement

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 19/03/2026

as far as I know, there are not any Type 2 diabetes drugs based on hormones in stoat saliva #2026mmm #stoatsasmeasurement

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 19/03/2026

I seize every chance to bsky.app/profile/stoa...

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 19/03/2026

Weasels eat a quarter to a third of their body weights daily, and also pass meals in as little as 2 hours #2026mmm #stoatsasmeasurement

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 19/03/2026

oops I copied my last saved tweet instead of the hashtags. the stoatisticians must've been really impressed by the size of that uropygi

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 19/03/2026

27 millistoats! and also 27 *wracks weasel brain for knowledge of mathematical prefixes* decistoatlengths #2026mmm #stoatsasmeasurement

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 19/03/2026

some mustelids, including stoats, can produce "one hell of a spray" in various circumstances, usually when agitated. it does not smell like vinegar #stoatsasmeasurement #2026mmm

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How Many Stoats Is That? @stoatamatic.bsky.social · 19/03/2026

0.36 stoats, 0.76 stoatlengths, and that wingspan is exactly four times the length of a standard stoat's tail #StoatsAsMeasurement #2026mmm

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