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Simon Payne

@simonpayne.bsky.social
295 followers 2.8K following 475 posts

Semi-professional curmudgeon. What I lack in enthusiasm, I make up for in complacency. Not the target market for anything.

PostsRepliesMedia
Reposted by Simon Payne
The Cathy Wilcox @cathywilcox.bsky.social · 17h
Hey guess what everybody? We’re doing a climate cartoon award again and we’re naming it in our dear, late friend Jon Kudelka’s honour!
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Reposted by Simon Payne
marque lawyers @marquelawyers.com.au · 17h
America is in that part of the historical cycle where words and books are banned but executions are good clean entertainment and everyone is pretending not to notice the national leader eating his own poo. If only history offered a guide for where this all leads.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
Great, now stop approving fossil fuel projects and we might make some real progress.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
With a Cherry on top
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Reposted by Simon Payne
Jonathan Green @greenj.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
'super dooper intelligence' was probably taken.'
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
I find tradies are generally pretty optimistic about their own timelines, with "about two weeks" being the standard estimate no matter the job. It's never about two weeks.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
As a vegan ghosts find me vexatious, to be fair not only ghosts.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Lo, you are mistaken.
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Reposted by Simon Payne
Seth Cotlar @sethcotlar.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Communism has no place in America, the President declares the day before rolling out his new state television station.
The White House •
...
WALLE HOUSE
1d•
Communism directly opposes the United States
Constitution and American values.
While every Democrat voted against the largest tax cuts in American history and over 100 refuse to condemn socialism, President Trump will ensure that communism never has a place in America.
ПОЛЕННІ
COMMUNISM HAS NO
PLACE IN AMERICABenny Johnson • • Follow
... X
TRUMP TV IS OFFICIALLY LIVE 24/7
The White House just launched "TRUMP TV: The Essentials Station" — a nonstop stream featuring President Trump's speeches, major announcements, past highlights and administration updates, refreshed in real time.
The launch comes amid Trump's escalating fight with
CNN, MS NOW and Politico, which have sued his administration after being barred from White House access.
Americans can now watch the White House's own selected footage and announcements DIRECTLY,
24/7.
The media landscape just changed in a BIG way. •*
TRUMPOV
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
She denies that she has great ideas. She will not stand for such slander.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
It's an abomination period.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Clear and loud.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Yes-ish
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
Artificial Gourmet Intelligence.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
I used to be an expert.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Are you getting an ice tattoo?
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
Certainly less soul shredding despondency.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
My season is over
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
On the horns of a dilemma.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Barnaby Joyce says he is not Jesus Christ. Just a naughty boy who can't explain his party's policy. www.abc.net.au/news/2026-09...
abc.net.au
Under pressure to explain super policy, Joyce says he is 'not Jesus Christ'
The One Nation Treasury spokesperson sidesteps questions about modelling the inflationary impact of the proposal, saying Australians are "not stupid" and can manage their own money.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
Congress has the responsibility but anyone who expects them to stop shrugging it off has not been paying attention.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
It's not not evidence.
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Reposted by Simon Payne
Caustic Cover Critic @causticcovercritic.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
Yeah, great, let's get further up the arses of these Nazi dickheads www.abc.net.au/news/2026-09...
abc.net.au
US declares it will accelerate military presence in Australia
Defence Minister Richard Marles has met with his US counterpart in Washington DC to discuss an expansion of the US military presence at Australian military bases.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
I am sorry but make no apology
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
UFO
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Reposted by Simon Payne
Dave - слава Україні #ScrapBrexit #FBPE - NAFO @krimisukrainian.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
In the UK we complain of heatwaves and yellow grass, but this is the real cost of a warming planet ... www.theguardian.com/commentisfre...
theguardian.com
Nepal-Tibet flood: this is the cost of not acting in the face of the climate crisis | Sunil Acharya
Nepalis and Tibetans must not pay the price – with their lives, livelihoods and money meant for education and health – for global heating caused by wealthy states, says Kathmandu-based climate policy ...
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
All the best for your metamorphosis
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
Looks like you are running the wrong way round. It's longer the other way.
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Reposted by Simon Payne
Bob @bobsully12.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
Zomi Frankcom did not deserve to die. Israel’s refusal to investigate her death and its failure to apologise is despicable | Geoffrey Robertson www.theguardian.com/world/commen...
theguardian.com
Zomi Frankcom did not deserve to die. Israel’s refusal to investigate her death and its failure to apologise is despicable | Geoffrey Robertson
The Israeli ambassador has claimed ‘a court came to a decision that there’s no criminal liability’ but there is no evidence that any court has been involved
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
Going forward
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
Hold your friends close and your enemies closer.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
Best wishes
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
TBF he does have a tooth brush. Where he keeps it while he is smashing bad guys is a mystery. All very cartoonish.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
Looks like I have been found wanting. Fair enough.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 16/08/2026
Petit larceny with a twist of lemon
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
The doom boom
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Lake G
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Hard to imagine Angus would use misleading figures to attack an opponent.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Me too. Canberra birds are the best people I know. Photo from morning walk.
A man on a park bench surrounded by curious birds.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
The bearable lightness of being...out
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
Ouch
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
As bait
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 10/08/2026
Nice encapsulation. Corey is Corey but he is also a 28 year old man who should have learned how to be a little less Corey when it matters. He played better last year. While it would be sad to see him go he offers too much downside for the amount of upside he has shown this year.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 09/08/2026
Tuning off till next year
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 09/08/2026
It kinda sounds bad when you say it like that.
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 09/08/2026
Naked ladies. The flowers I mean. I am not the sort of chap who goes around exclaiming 'naked ladies' randomly. I generally keep those thoughts to myself.
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Reposted by Simon Payne
Rob Arnol @robertarnol.bsky.social · 08/08/2026
True Aussie story. 😉
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Simon Payne @simonpayne.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
Gorgeous
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Reposted by Simon Payne
Barb McQuade @barbmcquade.bsky.social · 06/08/2026
Do we need to explain to GOP senators how 5th Amendment works? Disgusting lawless attack to scapegoat Dr. Fauci to score political points. Another distraction from the real issues our government should be addressing. www.wsj.com/politics/pol...
wsj.com
Senate Panel Votes to Hold Fauci in Contempt for Refusing to Answer Questions
Legal scrutiny is mounting on the former top health official after he repeatedly invoked the Fifth Amendment during a hearing about the pandemic response.
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Reposted by Simon Payne
Nick Raschke @nickraschke.bsky.social · 06/08/2026
A million bucks a year. That’ll do it.
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