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Squidward Thurman

@raebies621.bsky.social
357 followers 1K following 344 posts

Because screw the other place. Swiftie, lawyer, cat mom, and Batman enthusiast. The New York Mets give me the greatest joy yet cause me the greatest suffering.

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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Maybe do the same thing you did for the special that won you four Emmys. Just a thought.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
Can’t really argue that AI is gonna take jobs when it can’t even tell when people are dead.
A TikTok AI summary of Rob Reiner, claiming that the “viral posts” that he and his wife were murdered are unverified rumors.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
Would never work on my cat. She prefers meth.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
I hope CJ finally figured out where France is
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Something something leopards. Something something eating faces.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 09/08/2026
For International Cat Day - yesterday also happened to be Coraline’s first birthday. She had no interest in her birthday shrimp but absolutely devoured her Fancy Feast.
A black cat sits politely next to a birthday card from Chewy
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 05/08/2026
My new potentially radical take is that private corporations should not be involved in space exploration.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 31/07/2026
Hey so why does Tweetie Bird have a gun in Coyote vs. Acme
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
This news combined with Cohen’s casino plans pretty much cements that he does not give a damn about this team - he sees it as a way to make a quick buck. He has no intention of bringing us to a World Series. He has to go. www.wsj.com/sports/baseb...
wsj.com
New York Mets Become First MLB Team to Partner With a Prediction Market
The New York Mets are making the startup Novig their official prediction-market partner, marking a first for Major League Baseball as the prediction-markets industry looks for a foothold in profession...
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 28/07/2026
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 25/07/2026
Mookie Betts and Kike Hernandez declined the invitation. It wasn’t that hard for everyone else.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 25/07/2026
After seeing the Odyssey, I’ve decided that Nolan is the only director I trust to do a full adaptation of The Divine Commedy
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 19/07/2026
The curse lives on
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 19/07/2026
Let’s not forget the most important pattern: The team he roots for loses.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
Most places where teens would gather in my day either no longer exist (shopping malls) or have gotten too expensive to partake in on a regular basis (movie theaters). Not sure what you all expected.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 11/07/2026
I tried really hard not to care about the World Cup but my god that giant Viking man is adorable.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 04/07/2026
“Wow I can’t believe we’re turning 250 years old” The original 13 colonies:
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 01/07/2026
I grew up as an altar server. There are exactly two political issues where I would argue the Catholic Church contradicts leftist/liberal ideology: abortion and LGBTQ+ rights. But the ultimate lesson was always “love your neighbor.” That includes migrants. JD Vance is not a real Catholic.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
Not to say what he’s going through isn’t legitimate, but in literally every other profession you would not be able to take this kind of mental health break.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
The fact that it’s not unanimous is so concerning in and of itself.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 29/06/2026
How about this? I get the prepaid, Steve takes the leftover $10 bill and shoves it up his ass
Steve Cohen being an entitled asshole
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 21/06/2026
Amazing what career opportunities are open to people nowadays. For example, if you’re someone who wants to stand around and be completely useless, you can be a Camden traffic cop.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 19/06/2026
Airplane, and the doctor is Daniel Craig. I’ll never be quiet about this.
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Reposted by Squidward Thurman
Corey Rayburn Yung @coreyryung.bsky.social · 11/06/2026
My mayor Muslim My bagel Jewish Dolan screwed the Knicks Spurs in 6
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 11/06/2026
Nice that they brought Avery Wilson back to sing the Anthem without having to do so in the presence of the orange dictator.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 08/06/2026
Shoutout to the fly in my apartment for keeping the cat busy while I watch the Tony’s
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Reposted by Squidward Thurman
Lowering the Bar @loweringthebar.bsky.social · 30/05/2026
theonion.com/you-people-m...
theonion.com
You People Made Me Give Up My Peanut Farm Before I Got To Be President
For generations, U.S. presidents have gone to great lengths to avoid potential conflicts of interest. When I was elected, I followed suit by placing my small business in a blind trust to assure our ci...
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 30/05/2026
Is poor Rachel Reid gonna have to start rewriting the new Heated Rivalry book
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Reposted by Squidward Thurman
Eric Columbus @ericcolumbus.bsky.social · 29/05/2026
Trump must have missed this part of Judge Cooper's opinion. Or is he not interested in the Kennedy Center anymore because the judge said he has to remove his name from it?
Because Congresswoman Beatty has identified several irreparable harms that will flow from a two-year closure, and those harms outweigh any countervailing prejudice to the Defendants or the public, the Court will preliminarily enjoin the Defendants from effectuating the closure decision made at the March 16 Board meeting. However, the preliminary injunction will not prevent the Center from moving forward with the capital repair work it has planned, which the record demonstrates is sorely needed. Nor will it categorically prohibit the Board from closing the Center should it come to this decision anew after independently balancing its multiple obligations to the Center in a prudent fashion.
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Tim 🎃wens @attimowens.bsky.social · 29/05/2026
Congrats to Freedom250 for finally booking a new act.
The Irish vampires from Sinners
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 21/05/2026
This somehow feels simultaneously too long and too short of an Odyssey adaptation
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 26/04/2026
Remember when the menswear guy got two complete strangers to fight each other since they each fought they were fighting the menswear guy? An opportunity was missed here.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 22/04/2026
I looked at this for a solid 30 seconds before realizing it’s not from the Onion
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 22/04/2026
GAME TWELVE. GIVE IT UP FOR GAME TWELVE
Meme of sleep-deprived Mr. Krabs ringing a cowbell
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 19/04/2026
Don’t spend money on the Mets. Spend money on bacon egg and cheese sandwiches.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 18/04/2026
Every so often it becomes necessary to recirculate this:
The official Dave Matthews apology form
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 04/04/2026
If it isn’t Sean fighting the Giant Chicken from Family Guy I don’t want it
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 28/03/2026
The Mets are undefeated since Christopher Jackson screwed up the National anthem.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 23/03/2026
What in the Fabio is this design
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 21/03/2026
Love being able to identify different butterflies thanks solely to Animal Crossing
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 16/03/2026
OH THANK FUCK
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 16/03/2026
Is this a safe space to say that Golden is objectively the worst song from the movie
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 15/03/2026
Miles Caton not even being nominated for his role in this film is absolute madness.
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Reposted by Squidward Thurman
Coach Finstock @coachfinstock.bsky.social · 15/03/2026
He looks like the guy trying to break into the juke joint in Sinners
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 15/03/2026
I’m not taking health advice from a guy who clearly doesn’t know how to survive a zombie apocalypse.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 13/03/2026
The kitten rarely meows, so it’s always interesting to see on what rare occasions she will do so. Today it was because she discovered a paperclip was not suitable for batting around on the floor.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 06/03/2026
Him dating a Kardashian is making more and more sense each day.
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 28/02/2026
Make Republicans like Hank Hill Again
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 26/02/2026
So 2026 sucks A LOT
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Squidward Thurman @raebies621.bsky.social · 21/02/2026
Imagine making the fact that you converted to Catholicism 99% of your personality just for the pope to shit on you
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