First, what do I mean by the feeling I have had most of my life: that I don't belong? It's not difficult for me to identify elements of my young life which embedded these feelings: my mother's unstable mental health meant that I was passed between relatives at times, and that I was witness to her withdrawal from me. She would disappear in more ways than one, and, not only was I then virtually on my own physically, I was on my own emotionally too of course.

I am proud to share news of the publication of a lyric essay that I have co-authored with my colleague and friend Patricia Debney (also a survivor of child sexual abuse (CSA), also abused by her fa…

In the Land of Peaks and Troughs (see my last post), here's how I (we) climbed to Peak 1. The starting point: how is child sexual abuse represented in the arts, if indeed it is represented at all? Looking for ourselves in books, films, plays, visual arts, and music is a human thing. We look outward as ways of looking inward.

Like so many here on this earth, there is a lot going on for me right now, from every angle: in real life, in the wider world, psychologically and medically. The last few weeks have brought brilliant peaks -- and some very tough troughs. Troughs: I'm having more nightmares. This is of course a CPTSD reaction -- I reckon in response to the relentless disclosures of sexual abuse and assault, alongside the disgusting failure of those who are able to hold others accountable -- utterly failing to do so.

The liminal space of airports can take me one of two ways: either I feel elated by the possibilities that travel may hold, or I feel lost, rudderless, unmoored. It's not surprising I guess that what with everything happening in the world right now -- the latter pulled me in deep last night, as I traveled back from Germany after seeing our (beautiful, precious, smiling and laughing, curious) grandson.

So many are asking this question right now: survivors of Child Sexual Abuse, allies of survivors, and the general public. Who will be charged? Who will be prosecuted? And importantly: will this global explosion around sexual abuse and sex trafficking change anything? *** I was up at the University of York this week, diving into a set of materials gathered by relatives of a long-term survivor activist in the UK.

But we can do this. More soon. Hold tight.

Safe to say it's been a grim few days, on top of already grim days, on top of a hard year. I was raised never to be angry. Never to disrupt. Never to raise a fuss. For abuse victim survivors of any sort, anger can bring with it a variety of outcomes, all bad: more abuse perhaps, to 'put you in your place'; more attention, which may draw eyes to the abuse, which in turn will definitely destabilise your life -- and make everything worse.

So. I spent the first nine months of 2025 feeling pretty freaked out: everything seemed worse, and likely to keep getting worse. Pillars of what most people in the world have taken to be truths and even basic human rights crumbled and continued to crumble. I for one felt that the ground I had stood on my whole life was shifting, inexorably.

I have been writing and re-writing this post in my head for months. What happened? I considered this for weeks. What I did not want to admit (to myself, or anyone) was how completely shaken I was by the re-election of an abuser to the White House. His re-emergence, followed by lawless action after lawless action, rendered me almost paralysed. What is the point of working away in my small corner of the fight against Violence Against Women and Girls, when the whole world order has turned justice on its head?

In first interview since resigning, former archbishop of Canterbury says more cases were arriving every day and he ‘got it wrong’

National monument commemorates 1969 riot led by trans women of color outside historic New York City bar

Leading feminist philosopher Judith Butler has declared that abandoning trans people or any minority is operating within 'fascist logic'.

Right Rev Mariann Budde’s appeal amounts to bold public criticism and prompts frosty response from US president

Tom Crowther KC says public inquiries seen as ‘Rolls-Royce solution’ but local review in Shropshire led to real progress

Editorial: The response to the independent inquiry has been too slow. New policies to tackle all forms of abuse are needed urgently