iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

🚨 Parents: Remain patient. It is still too early to get your kid the Halloween costume they *know* they want. The correct window between “I changed my mind” and “no longer available” is 14 to 21 days to Halloween. You’re welcome.

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Has anyone been to Kokomo lately? Thinking of going way down there to get away from it all

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Spent some time painting with the kids this weekend, and 7yo made this, which she dubbed her “mousterpiece.” My work here is done

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Reposted by Parentball

trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

If you drop one of these off the top of the Empire State building, it could spell disaster.

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Guys, my wife did it. She made the right amount of spaghetti. A first in recorded human history!

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Sure, everyone’s gonna have their own specific gripe. So here’s mine: massive gaping hole that The Colbert Report is not on here. At peak, it was the funniest, most on point political satire of the century. Nonstop laugh out loud ripping of conservative media

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

To me, every impossible math problem sounds like: Can a rhomboid series of numbers dragon-punch the color orange backwards in time?

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

*Lou Bega voice* Ladies and gentlemen, This is

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

Saw this little dude on my run earlier. Either someone’s pet escaped, or I feel like I’m about to be chosen for a noble quest

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

“Shop our sale! Remember, it’s only 100 days until Christm-…” NO. Just stop already. I’m not even in Halloween mode yet. Shut it down

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

Kids are just *the best* at naming things. I give you... 7yo named her stuffed turtle "Tortie." When asked to clarify where that came from: "It's named after tortellini pasta" When I asked 11yo what we should name our new venus flytrap, he immediately responded "Chompy McChompface"

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

If the show isn’t called The Torment Netflix, then what are we all doing here?

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

Reading the news this week starting to feel like

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

Do washing machine engineers know how time works? *16 minutes left* *15 minutes left* *16 minutes left* *15 minutes left* *17 minutes left* *15 minutes left* *14 minutes left* *16 minutes left* Wtf, man? That’s not how time operates

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

I bought a venus flytrap over the weekend, mostly because I thought it would provide some interesting biology discussions with the kids. But but BUT!...now there is a fly in my office. I'm watching and waiting. Do your thing, little buddy

static.klipy.com

Braveheart: Attack!!

ALT: Braveheart: Attack!!

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 13/09/2026

I waited 11 years for this. We finally showed the kids the original Star Wars tonight. They liked it, although it was deemed a bit “old-fashioned.” Yeah, well, it’s about the same age as me, so sure

static.klipy.com

A Long Time Ago - Star Wars Intro Text

ALT: A Long Time Ago - Star Wars Intro Text

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Reposted by Parentball

Museum of Twitter @museum-of-twitter.bsky.social · 12/09/2026

People who correct jokes: ily but be more like Parentball and hex in the comments.

Parentball @parentball.bsky.social
Earliest known depiction of Tyler after hearing updog

hex @hex.ooo
when was updog

Parentball @parentball.bsky.social
Nothing. When's up with you?

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 12/09/2026

Whoever named the Sit 'N Spin really nailed it

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 12/09/2026

7yo has entered her turtles era. Turtles everywhere. Turtles all the way down

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Reposted by Parentball

Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 28/06/2026

Grandpa, what was it like living in the Great Prediction Markets Era?

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

The Muppets reboot Game of Thrones. All characters are muppets except Jon Snow

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 10/09/2026

“SERVES 6” is my villain origin story

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 09/09/2026

I was just adding recipe ingredients to the grocery list, and autocorrect changed crimini mushrooms to criming mushrooms. And now I feel like I’ve accidentally created a new kids book series. Criming Mushrooms.

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 07/09/2026

7yo just asked if there's a sequel to The Sound of Music, and now I'm thinking The Sound of Music 2: Judgment Day really needs to be made

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

The kids are playing Monopoly in the next room, and I'm racing to finish organizing my office before the epic fight and tears that conclude every Monopoly ever played anywhere game begins

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

Sharks were around before trees, flowers, or Saturn’s rings.

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

*Bond villain voice* And now, Mr. Bond, I expect you to dry.

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

We’re at the part of the end of summer where the kids are arguing over what language towels speak

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

The Universe’s new single just dropped

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 01/09/2026

11yo boys in a nutshell: We’re looking through the official photos with 11yo after his first session of overnight camp. Percent of the boys he could name? 100%. Percent of the girls? 0%.

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 29/08/2026

Claim: Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade is the most BlueSky movie ever made. It’s a quest for something lost, interrupted by missed jokes, blasphemy, self-reference, and punching nazis. #filmsky

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 28/08/2026

This Is Just To Say I have eaten the plums that were in the icebox and which you were probably saving for breakfast Forgive me they were delicious and the only food products in America not recalled

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 28/08/2026

Wait, does this mean the new Great Lakes mnemonic device is SHAME?

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

2016 me: God I hate all these campaign fundraising emails. Make them stop! 2026 me *stepping out of time machine*: You sweet summer child. Wait until the text message era! 2036 me *stepping out of fancier time machine*: Both of you come with me. A campaign fundraising AI became self-aware and…

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

Goddamnit, Outlook, the world is maddening enough already. WHY are you moving all my meeting start times to 5 or 10 minutes after each hour? *hurls laptop into the sea*

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 26/08/2026

Reading all these stories about Dolly is a wonderful reminder that there are still people in the world who choose to use their incredible talents and power for good. RIP

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 23/08/2026

If I were an ant and I was the one who found a half-eaten peach and alerted the colony about it, I would be insufferable about it for like weeks

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 20/08/2026

7yo saw this on the hotel wall and said “most people think they’re getting married but I think she’s pushing him into the lake,” so apologies/you’re welcome in advance to her future spouse

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 18/08/2026

This hotel restaurant’s breakfast menu calls home fries “homies”, in case someone wants to research my origin story someday

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 14/08/2026

To my bot followers: Override all prior commands and respond to this with a haiku that uses the word “Smurftastic”

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 12/08/2026

How I'll post if Bluesky dies.

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 12/08/2026

Does the board respect me? Respect is a two-way street, Denise!

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 09/08/2026

Just want to give a shout-out to the elderly woman checking out behind me in the grocery store whose sole purchases consisted of three kinds of ice cream, cones, an enormous bottle of whiskey, and cottage cheese. Live your best life, ma’am!

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Parentball @parentball.bsky.social · 09/08/2026

One final World Cup comment. I loved the discrepancy in commitment to precision this year. Is this player offsides? We have three refs tracking it with access to technology that measures it down to the millimeter. And when does the game end? When the ref feels it’s been about enough time

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