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Ryan Bayne

@mutantlog.com
90 followers 114 following 3.7K posts

Random jokes, opinions, dry sarcasm, etc. Strong thoughts about The Cardigans. My views are my own. He/him. Waterloo, ON

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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 21/09/2026
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 19/09/2026
I'm no Bible scholar, but it sure has a lot of wild stories. Like the Tower of Babel, and the whole building something tall causing issues. Unrelated, here's my view from Tokyo Skytree.
Photo from the observation deck at Tokyo Skytree. Outside the windows is just clouds. You can't see anything.
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 16/09/2026
Self diagnosed CTE? Sounds bad. But at least there's a shirt for him.
T-shirt from the webcomic Beartato with a picture of Reginald shouting "Guess I've Got Brain Problems!"
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 16/09/2026
For some reason this didn't make it over from the bad place, but as noted, they only recommend _an_ annual hamburger, so I'm saving it for November and eating a bacon, egg & cheese from Smashburger instead.
Post from me from the bad place reading "Actually many doctors agree that an annual hamburger before 8am is part of a balanced diet."
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 13/09/2026
A Bloom County comic where a man is very excited about gas being 69.9 cents per gallon. He notes that it's cheaper than many other liquid products, and at the end tells his wife to dump the milk as they will now be giving unleaded gasoline to their cat to drink.
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 04/09/2026
This once again proves my theory.
Photo of Norm Macdonald on the Weekend Update set of Saturday Night Live. Behind him is a photo of a Bulk Barn. A caption reads "Germans love Bulk Barn"
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 21/08/2026
It's missing his most famous saying.
A grey t-shirt with an image of the Honey Nut Cheerios bee and the words "Who needs pants" printed in block letters.
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 17/08/2026
Adult hospitals should definitely been able to buy these Pokémon portable x-ray machines too!
A hospital worker pushing a Pokémon portable X-ray machine with Pokéball wheels. Pikachu and Piplup feature prominently on the side, and Pachirisu, Chimchar, Leafeon, and Croagunk also appear on the machine.
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 17/08/2026
I was shocked when I saw this. The infomercial never told me to read and follow all the instructional material!
A screenshot from the Ronco Rotisserie & BBQ Instructions video reading as follows:
Don't take "Set It And Forget It" literally. It's only valid if you have read and followed all the instructional material.
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 23/07/2026
I made this as it seemed like a good reaction GIF, but I'm pretty sure I've never used it myself.
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 29/06/2026
Japan of course! I've had this JFA Pikachu since the 2014 World Cup.
A plush Pikachu in a Japan Football Association jersey and holding a JFA flag posed in front of a TV with a player holding a JFA banner in advance of Japan's R32 game against Brazil.
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 14/06/2026
JFA (Japan Football Association) Pikachu is here to cheer on Japan in his 3rd men's World Cup. He slept through the 2022 games as if he's JFA Snorlax or something.
A plush Pikachu dressed in a 2014 World Cup Japan Football Assocation jersey and carrying a Japan Football Association flag sits in front of a TV showing a Japanese player during the Japanese national anthem prior to the start of NED-JPN at the 2026 World Cup.
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 24/05/2026
I guess this one, but I find it a bit needy.
A bottle of Clorox® Disinfecting Toilet Bowl Cleaner Clinging Bleach Gel
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 14/05/2026
If he said "It reminds me of Rax restaurants and their depressing mascot Mr. Delicious", I'd understand.
A picture of Rax Restaurants mascot Mr. Delicious. He's wearing a bow tie, a plaid jacket, glasses, and a briefcase reading "Mr. D"
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 06/05/2026
I looked to see if anyone else on here has a Doonesbury comic from 1993 burned into their brain and had done this already. Not that I could find, but I do apparently need to tag @joshuajfriedman.com in this.
An image that appears to be the "Burger King" logo, but reads "Burger Kling". Below that reads "Lunch with Dlop"
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 03/05/2026
Kitchener teen filmed himself firing gun while driving car during crime spree: www.therecord.com/gift-redeem?...
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 16/04/2026
A frame from "Bart the Lover", Season 3, Episode 16 of "The Simpsons. A black-and-white film is being shown, while a man yells "Come back, zinc. Come back!"
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 01/11/2025
I wonder what the branding discussions are like for this company dealing with international travellers...
Photo of "International Currency Exchange" booth at Pearson International Airport Terminal 3 international departures. The logo reads "ice".
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 01/11/2025
Ugh, I had all year to come up with a joke about my annual 6-7am Smashburger and I didn't come up with something. Oh well, here's hoping next year is funnier.
Photo of a Smashburger and the bag it came in
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 28/10/2025
"Davis Schneider" is an alias, to hide the fact that the Jays organization raised the illegitimate child of Rance Mulliniks as their own.
A photo of Rance Mulliniks, 3rd baseman for the Toronto Blue Jays from 1982-1992.
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 21/10/2025
I hoped the photo was just going to be these.
Front view of a Fisher Price Movie Viewer TheaterFisher Price movie player cartridge of "Lonesome Ghosts" featuring Goofy, Mickey Mouse, and Donald Duck
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 11/09/2025
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 09/09/2025
Two tweets from Raphael Bob-Waksberg. First one from Feb 17, 2019 reads "Him just for all my followers: I feel like this goes without saying and I understand why some people relate to BoJack, but if the character on the show you see yourself in is Flip McVicker, uh, what? Maybe get that looked at? Okay byeeeeeeeee."

Second one from Jul 7, 2020 reads : "Hiiiiii, me again! Just squeezing in to say real quick: if you are abusive, petty, and self-important, your Flip McVicker user icon is not the self-aware joke you think it is! Okay byeeeeeeeee."
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 05/09/2025
Had to break out the Sam Darnold generator.
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 26/08/2025
Better vegemite than bleach! theonion.com/poison-preve...
A picture of Pikachu enjoying ketchup from a bottle, but the ketchup bottle has been replaced with a clipart picture of a bottle of bleach.
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 24/08/2025
It's gotta be the Hallmonsters in Venture on ColecoVision for me. These things freaked me out!
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 31/07/2025
I probably don't want it $200USD worth though...
A screenshot of a custom bowling ball from https://www.ontheballbowling.com/ that reads "Uncontrolled Gout" "is not a game" "Krystexxaepeglioticas"
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 30/07/2025
I remember it!
Photo of the Perelman Performing Arts Centre, as screenshotted in a tweet accusing the building of being an American Kaaba, and then dropped into a template from Custompogs.com so that one can fill in the joke "Remember the Ground Zero Mosque? It's back, in pog form!" in their mind
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 01/06/2025
So mad that whoever took these photos missed out on framing one like this.
A photo of a Bed Bath & Beyond in Polo Park, Winnipeg MB, with the sign framed so that the first "BE" is out of frame, and a post obscures the right side of the "D" in "BED" so that it looks like it says "Death & Beyond"
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 29/05/2025
A screenshot of Homer Simpson from the episode "Mr. Plow [9F07]" of The Simpsons. A caption reads "It's a pornography store. I was buying pornography."

For additional context, Homer was being asked about his automobile accident. He wanted to lie about the nature of Moe's, a Springfield bar where he was drinking alcohol.
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 18/11/2024
Age yourself with your first computer.
TRS-80 Model 1 computer including monitor and Realistic tape recorder. The monitor reads "THERE'S ONLY ONE PLACE YOU CAN FIND IT---" and then repeatedly states with an incrementing indent "RADIO SHACK". Photo courtesy IEEE Spectrum https://spectrum.ieee.org/the-consumer-electronics-hall-of-fame-tandyradioshack-trs80-model-1
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 02/11/2024
This is what that "Tradition" song from Fiddler is about, correct? #smashburger
A wrapped Smashburger and drink on a table at Pearson International Airport, early in the morning
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 23/10/2024
I took this photo in Waterloo ON back in January, just because I knew you would post about it, and definitely not to make innuendo about the product name.
A grocery shelf labelled "wiener wrap" with various tins of Pillsbury Wiener Wrap stocked above the sign.
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 16/09/2024
Here I was thinking it took me forever to get on here, but apparently I'm some sort of fancy early pants?
"Celebrating 10M users (celebration emoji). #767,645 with a stamp reading Bluesky Elder Certified First 10%. Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com Joined Aug 28, 2023"
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 10/07/2024
@ryannorth.ca Nine years ago it wasn't even stocked at the Stratford Theatre Store and now you have a display!
A picture of Ryan North's (and William Shakespeare's) books "To Be Or Not To Be" and "Romeo and/or Juliet" on display at the Theatre Store attached to the Avon Theatre at the Stratford Festival.
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 22/05/2024
Homer Simpson listening to his thoughts tell him "$7.86 dollars can buy a small number of peanuts." This is in relation to the LifeLabs data breach class action settlement in Canada.
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 13/05/2024
I had to do this obvious edit, even before I saw your post.
An edited version of the Mary Worth comic strip for 2024/05/13.
First panel: (CAPTION: The next morning as Wilbur goes to feed his goldfish..." Wilbur: "Time to eat, Stellan and Willa!"
Second panel: (Full frame view of Wilbur's face shouting) Wilbur: "AAAUUUGGGHHH!"
Third panel (added, not present in actual comic): Wilbur: "Time to eat Stellan and Willa!"
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 08/04/2024
Do you have a colander?
Photo of pant leg with a number of small crescents projected on it due to a colander out of frame.
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 04/11/2023
Switching away from the cess pool to hear means I can't retweet my chain of the past four times I've eaten Smasbburger too early in the morning, but I assure you this is a weird tradition of mine. And it's not the only one. #warmsoda
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 13/05/2023
@ryanqnorth The Theatre Shop at the Avon Theatre in Stratford is well stocked early in the season.
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 19/04/2023
@TomFawkes Order from the Pokémon Center arrived, and this was what I had to do first.
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 20/03/2022
Oh god, 15 years of slowly poisoning my brain. *whispers* That's Chappie #MyTwitterAnniversary
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 19/03/2022
@BeardoLawyer Good idea! #MK8D #NintendoSwitch
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 05/11/2021
Guess who's back on his shit again?
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 25/06/2021
@AsmodeeDigital Was just playing Ticket to Ride (Steam on macOS 10.14) and saw this notification pop-up. Why the use of the gendered pronoun "him", especially when the person who's up next uses female pronouns?
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 01/06/2021
@canadaposthelps Conostogo PO in Waterloo ON (www.canadapost-postescanada.ca/info…) hours online are different than what the @ShopprsDrugMart posted on their door. Frustrating to follow the linked info...
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 11/04/2021
Some of the gang from Clone High trying to get vaccinated at their local Ontario pharmacy.
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 23/04/2020
@fullbright @zusty Now visitors know how much our island loves jazz. #AnimalCrossing #ACNH #NintendoSwitch
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 23/04/2020
Just what no one was waiting for! #AnimalCrossing #ACNH #NintendoSwitch
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Ryan Bayne @mutantlog.com · 13/04/2020
@littlenavi_ Thank you! #AnimalCrossing #ACNH #NintendoSwitch
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