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Reposted by Jeff (Mixed Metaphors)

dirt of the looming dawn @upfromsumdirt.blacksky.app · 19h

my apologies i thought i'd be weirder than this

Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 14/10/2026

It's kind of like how Frank Abagnale Jr. was a famed check fraudster who helped the government catch check fraudsters, except most of the story about this fraudster told by the fraudster turned out to be a fraud. At least that one was fun.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 14/10/2026

I do think there are some books that you have to have read at a certain age. I didn't read it until I was a cynical adult and I had soooo many complaints and eye rolls. But I imagine it would have been different had I read it as a kid.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 14/10/2026

I'm not saying Peter Jackson was intentionally white washing history since I don't know his intent nor was LotR "history." But choices to portray medieval Europe (even fantasy medieval Europe) as all white influence the future, because the next portrayal "learns history" from the last one.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 14/10/2026

This is a hugely important point because today's collective memory is largely driven by films. When racist idiots complain that some new movie has unrealistic diversity, they have no knowledge of the past. They've seen older movies that were intentionally white washing history!

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 14/10/2026

This is a great thread about adaptations, worth a read. One thing I'll add: people tend to treat adaptations as translations, except instead of translating from one language to another it's translating from book to screen. Both are nuanced artistic endeavors, but they don't have the same goals.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 14/10/2026

Also I got this book out of the library some time ago but had to return it before I even read the first page.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 14/10/2026

Are you naked in this photo? Is this a thirst trap?

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 13/10/2026

I was going to say these seem too trivial to put on a to-do list except you have reminded me I forgot to brush my teeth this morning. Time to 🪥

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 13/10/2026

"two to-dos" is a fun thing to say out loud. . . . . . To-do: two tutus to 'tude dudes.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 13/10/2026

It really is! And this was a real, honest to goodness, 60+ minutes of manual labor task, so I wasn't cheating.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 13/10/2026

How am I supposed to get any to-dos done when even updating my to-do list is something I procrastinate?

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 13/10/2026

The thing is, I've been meaning to clean my porch for ages. And I keep thinking I should add "clean porch" to my to-do list. So, technically, "add 'clean porch' to to-do list" was one of my to-dos. Meaning I've essentially knocked off two to-dos at once.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 13/10/2026

Thank you for letting me know I'm not alone!

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 13/10/2026

Does anyone else add tasks to a to-do list after they are already complete so that you get to immediately cross them off?

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

The "12 Teas of Christmas" was my actual experience visiting my mom until I finally started remembering to bring my own tea with me. All she ever had was decaffeinated instant coffee and that advent calendar.

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Reposted by Jeff (Mixed Metaphors)

Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

You inspired me to do a really dumb thing.

An alignment chart:

Lawful good: Go to the tea specialist in your local China Town and have them prepare you a selection of vendor-recommended loose leaf teas from the bins

Neutral good: Buy fancy loose leaf tea from the supermarket.

Chaotic good: Get heaping scoops of loose leaf tea from unlabeled bins sold by some guy at the farmers market.

Lawful neutral: Buy bagged chamomile and bagged English breakfast from the supermarket.

True neutral: A picture of Lipton yellow label tea

Chaotic neutral: Buy everything herbal on sale from the David's Tea website, then throw in a few black teas.

Lawful evil: Buy several looseleaf teas from the tea specialist and then dump them all in one bag and mix.

Neutral evil: Tea from the "12 Teas of Christmas" advent calendar your mom's neighbor gave her six years ago.

Chaotic evil: Run through the forest grabbing fallen leaves and twigs and then steep them in hot water.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

You inspired me to do a really dumb thing.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

But have you considered using AI to pick tea for you? (This is a joke.) My foolproof method of picking tea is by exclusively buying chamomile and English breakfast. I am guessing that's Lawful Good?

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

Thank you. I did end up sleeping fitfully and having nightmares last night. 😆 But that was at least partially the wine's fault.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

Well, I am sorry to everyone for drinking half a bottle of wine and live-posting my way through Hokum.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

This is really brilliant. Complicated characters, a layer of sadness, scary, gorgeous sets. I'm not going to sleep tonight, am I?

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

The thing about horror movies is that, unlike you, the characters don't know they are in horror movies. That's why they behave the way they do! But at some point when it becomes clear to them that they are in a horror movie, then they need to get the heck out.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

I love when scary/action/thriller movies are funny because of genuine in-character behavior rather than quips and meta-humor that is tension breaking and generally outside of the reality of the film.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

Oh no, now I definitely am rooting against Adam Scott. Don't be mean to bell boys. (This is like a thing in movies, isn't it? You can judge a character by how they treat animals and paid staff.)

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

Yeah this is good. Anti-goat killing. Vegan propaganda (complimentary).

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

Adam Scott is so great at playing an asshole. Am I supposed to root for or against him in this movie?

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

If I've learned anything from horror movies it's that the only thing scarier than old people are children.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

That does help. One thing about horror compared to other genres is it's less clear whether you are going to get a good ending.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

I'm only watching this because I love Party Down.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

This is already too scary for me you lied to me everyone

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

Should I watch Hokum tonight? Am I drunk enough or too drunk for a scary movie? I used to like scary movies but now I live alone in the woods and I'm less inclined to not sleep for several days.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

I just want to say I am an avid genre fiction reader and writer. I love it all. You should listen to me! Don't listen to people who only read one or the other! So much of the anti-literary fiction hate is written by people who haven't read any since high school!

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

Everyone, I have a really long rant to make about why people so consistently stake out these weird anti-literary fiction positions (there's been a lot of them recently on BlueSky) but I am quite drunk right now and I think it would be a mistake.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

Hervé Le Tellier, T. Coraghessan Boyle, Hiroko Oyamada, Ingrid Winterbach, Don DeLillo, Carsten Jensen, Gerald Murnane, Ali Smith, Ófeigur Sigurðsson, László Krasznahorkai, Dubravka Ugrešić, Antoine Volodine, Lucy Corin... I could list literary fiction authors who write eco-topics all day long.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

And that's just thinking of novels where climate change and environmental damage are at the forefront of the story. If I expanded to any literary fiction novel where there's a background element or thematic element of the instability and uncertainty around climate it would be 10x as long.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

Does literary fiction not tackle the topic of climate change and environment? I've read so much that does! Richard Powers, Sarah Hall, Ben Lerner, Barbara Kingsolver, Jenny Offill, Annie Proulx, Daniel Mason, Carys Davies, Karen Russell, Samantha Harvey, Olga Tokarczuk... the list goes on and on!

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 09/10/2026

Ah... Okay that does make slightly more sense. The whole thing is still a radical misunderstanding of the human condition and why we engage with art and games and movies, etc., but, okay, that one part isn't quite as bad as I thought.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 09/10/2026

I'm not sure if you are saying that's him playing it, but I assume this whole thing is the instruction set he gives to the agent. Yes, he's made it playable online so his friends can join, but he has the agent instructed to start selling it before he even gets the "I'm finished" message back.

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 09/10/2026

Another thing... In his vision of this game, he has the agent selling it immediately. Before he even bothers playing it! He's turned his hometown and all his hopes and dreams into his perfect personalized game for himself and he doesn't even care enough to play it. What is the point of anything?

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 09/10/2026

I know this is the least dumb thing about this post, but why would anyone want to buy this game? It's such paradoxical thinking: A) This tech makes it trivial for everyone to generate personalized games to their exact preferences. B) I'll sell my insanely personalized game to other people. What?

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Jeff (Mixed Metaphors) @mixedmetaphors.bsky.social · 09/10/2026

To wrap up my favorite holiday "Make Jokes about the Nobel Prize in Literature Day" please commence with the ritual reading of the annual Alex Shephard and Mark Krotov article. It's consistently my favorite part of my favorite day. As always, funny and insightful.

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