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Lumber Jackson

@millburray.bsky.social
498 followers 353 following 2K posts

“the Jackson Pollock of portable toilets” —Journal of Light Construction

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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
(first date) me: please, tell me a bit about yourself. her: well, I'm a constable. me: *excitedly* my body is a prison, too!
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Laura Bassett @lebassett.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
“If you don’t like public executions just don’t watch it” says the crowd trying to ban drag shows and books
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
this is disgusting. that said, i would pay to watch the same happen to the guy announcing it. the duality of man www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026...
theguardian.com
Pentagon says execution of Fort Hood shooter will be livestreamed
Nidal Hasan, army psychiatrist who killed 13 people, will be executed by firing squad on 3 December
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
Pray heaven has plump dongs.
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Stars and Stripes @starsandstripes.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
An estimated 81 U.S. military aircraft and drones have been destroyed or damaged during the conflict with Iran at a cost of up to $3.3 billion.
stripes.com
US has lost up to 81 aircraft and drones in conflict with Iran
The report from the Congressional Research Service estimated the cost of the lost and damaged aircraft was between $1.9 billion and $3.3 billion.
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Kasey Gifford @kaseygifford.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
To put this in perspective chestnut trees used to be dominant species in the United States. Billions of trees were killed by fungal blight and now fully grown America chestnuts are functionally extinct. There is no getting them back. Ever. All for a data center. www.gadgetreview.com/one-of-ameri...
gadgetreview.com
One of America’s Last Chestnut Groves Is About to Be Destroyed for a Data Center
A rare 200-tree American chestnut grove in West Virginia may be cleared for data-center development, but the project denies the site is on its land.
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
Yes, take out San Diego, home to the second-largest surface-ship naval base in the world. Kill all those red-state kids trying to get ahead in service of their country. That’ll show those blue-state bastards.
The Orange County Register: In Nebraska speech, Trump says Iran can 'take out a city,' mentions Los Angeles and San Diego
"Let 'em take out Los Angeles, let 'em take out San Diego,"
Trump said.
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
Dr: Kelly, I have some bad news. You have a chronic condition. Kelly Slater: No way, dude. Please doc, tell me I’ll still be able to surf. Doc: I’m afraid not, son. According to these results, you’re chronically drowning in pussy. ktla.com/news/califor...
ktla.com
Longtime surfers are being diagnosed with this strange condition
Researchers in Orange County are helping identify a condition unique to longtime surfers that may be mistaken for cancer. Dermatology Professor Dr. Jeffrey Klein at UC Irvine led research into iden…
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
said this on my wedding night, but with different punctuation
From r/mildlyinteresting: A picture of a person standing in front of a beaver dam that’s taller than they are with the title “The size of this beaver dam.”
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Where all my anti-vaxxers at? www.themoscowtimes.com/2026/10/02/n...
themoscowtimes.com
Nearly 200 People Under Observation After Irkutsk Lab Worker Dies From Plague - The Moscow Times
Health authorities in Siberia’s Irkutsk region have placed nearly 200 people under medical observation after a laboratory worker died from plague, according to media reports and a statement by a regio...
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Gillian Brockell @gillianbrockell.com · 04/10/2026
There are new and specific numbers in this story, so it’s worth reading. I continue to resent the lack of credit to Nick Schwellenbach at @pogo.org, Dan Friedman at @motherjones.com, and me, who have previously reported every other aspect of this story, including that the sale prices were very high.
Kristi Noem's Agency Gave Her Donor a Lucrative Contract Just Before She
Left
The Homeland Security Department signed a multi-million dollar agreement to buy five aircraft from a company owned by a political contributor of the secretary on her last day, documents show.
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Everything would make a lot more sense if Trump was right and there actually were 107 million Americans with intellectual disabilities
Post from Brian Krassenstein: “Trump says that his convention had 107 million views and the NFL game that night had 25 Million.
Here are the actual Nielsen-based estimates for TV/streaming viewers across Fox News, Newsmax and NewsNation:
3.3 Million Trump Speech
25.1 Million NFL Game
FACT: Trump Lied.”
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
searched last week for ways to stop a neighborhood bully cat from coming into my house and now all my ads are like this
Ali Express ad on Instagram for Pet Incinerator
• Smokeless & odorless
• Easy to Operate
• Customizable
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James Fallows @jfallows.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Somehow not everyone is aware of fact alluded to below. So one more time: John Roberts, Brett Kavanaugh, Amy Coney Barrett were all on GWBush 2000 'Florida Recount' team. (Which made GWB first prez in 112 yrs to 'win' after losing popular vote. Now they 'impartially' rule on our future.)
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
musta come out feet first
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
"so dumb you'd fuck up a lethal injection twice" has entered the lexicon
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
he’s gonna rename it The Unites States of America isn’t he
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
I bought a bag of potatoes before leaving for a 6-week reporting trip and in that time my apartment mate returned from a long trip with his gf and when they opened the door they got hit with a stench so foul and the buzz of so many flies they thought there might be a corpse but it was just potatoes
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Why’d he call it “super intelligence” when “Alpha Intelligence” was right there?
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
I’m officially renaming Artificial Intelligence Eric Schmitt Intelligence, because it fucks up the most easily googleable shit you could possibly imagine.
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
a hawkeye is someone who shoots and never misses, which is why Eric Schmitt doesn’t know shit about em
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kenofseattle @kenofseattle.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Seattle
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Drew McKevitt @drewmckevitt.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
It's a bit of a bummer that the story today has been "look at this absolute doofus of a senator" and not "Jack Smith once again credibly accuses the president of many serious crimes"
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Marisa Kabas @marisakabas.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
if you know anything about senator schmitt's monumental fuck up in the jack smith hearing, i implore you to reach out. can be anonymous. signal: marisakabas.04 email: marisa@thehandbasket.co
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
TIL the name Eric Schmitt because he used his soapbox as a US senator from Missouri to provide irrefutable proof he has no business being a senator. An embarrassment to his state, his country, and his species.
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
sesame street isn’t a place it’s a state of mind and the way you get there is shroooooms
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
or maybe the average person doesn’t pay attention to or give the slightest shit about your personal passion that is also what you do for a living and are overly plugged into you fuggin no-self-awareness nerd
Excerpt from a rolling stone article: “At this point, though, if someone contends they've never even heard of “Choosin' Texas" or Langley, it may say more about the listener than the song.
Or, for that matter, what they want to project to the world. With incessant news coverage alongside chart and playlist presence, it's pretty difficult to still claim total ignorance on this one.
Perhaps there is a deeper reason why people say they haven't heard the song and feel the need to make it known: cultural cachet.”
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
I’m not saying my 4 y.o. Is a genius, but he did invent “emergency cheese”
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Andrew Quemere @andrewqmr.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
A couple went on a Fox News podcast and claimed the state of #Massachusetts took away their teen because they won't help the teen transition. But it's actually because the father was charged with beating and threatening to kill the teen and the mother was charged with witness intimidation.
wbur.org
Mass. parents' story about child's gender transition complicated by court records
Joseph Kutzko was charged with assaulting the child in January 2025, not long before the child was removed from the family’s home. Mother Arlene Kutzko was charged with witness intimidation in connect...
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
you KNOW this guy getting a pardon
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
he doesn’t even look excited to jerk a dude off into his face anymore.
Post from the white house encouraging downloading of their “news app” featuring a photo of a downtrodden-looking trump doing his signature “jerking a dude off into to my mouth” hand gesture, but his mouth is closed and it looks like he might cry. It’s as if someone told him McDonald’s closed 3 minutes ago.
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Absolutely. And it’s why, in my 40’s, I adopted a parrot and a tortoise.
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Stars and Stripes @starsandstripes.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
A retired Army paratrooper who served in two wars and in civilian life assisted in evacuating a gravely wounded reporter in Ukraine has died after a battle with cancer. www.stripes.com/veterans/202...
stripes.com
Paratrooper ‘to his core’: Army vet who helped get injured reporter out of Ukraine dies at 50
A retired Army paratrooper who served in two wars and assisted in evacuating a gravely wounded reporter in Ukraine has died from cancer.
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
If there’s an ad before a video and the ad resets when I hit the supplied fast-forward button, I’m closing that tab or hitting back immediately. That video might as well not exist.
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
simps gonna simp
brown noser pete hegseth: The Department of War fully supports President Trump's decision to kick CNN, MSNBENOW and Politico to the curb so they can publish their Fake News from outside the White House.
We are grateful these outlets already chose to self-deport from the Pentagon. They endangered our troops with false stories, leaks, and trafficked in fiction and lies about the President, our Warriors, and their mission.
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Jess Piper @piperformissouri.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
The price of a gallon of diesel in Des Moines is nearly the same as the hourly minimum wage in Iowa…
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Allison Gill @muellershewrote.com · 17/09/2026
ICE agent Christian Castro - who shot Sosa-Celis in Minneapolis and lied about it, and who TX Governor Abbott refused to extradite - has been ARRESTED by the Minnesota Bureau of Criminal Apprehension. www.startribune.com/minnesota-of...
startribune.com
ICE agent wanted in Metro Surge shooting is booked into Hennepin County Jail
Christian Castro will now appear in state court one day ahead of his federal court proceedings.
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Marisa Kabas @marisakabas.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
New — I wrote about this weird thing where people within the Republican party keep being exposed as Nazis and the party then tries to claim each one is an aberration. The facts, as I lay out here, indicate otherwise:
thehandbasket.co
Republicans don’t have a Nazi problem—they are the Nazi problem
A spate of recent revelations have shown the ideologies and their adherents are one and the same.
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Jake @jakeklee23.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
The problem that Dems will have in 28 is that they must prosecute & reverse everything this administration did, but the GOP candidates will say “move on” and the complicit American media will also ask, “isn’t it time to move on?”. We have an obligation to make sure nothing like this happens again
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
republicans in disarray
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Marisa Kabas @marisakabas.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
promise kept
thehandbasket.co
Republicans don’t have a Nazi problem—they are the Nazi problem
A spate of recent revelations have shown the ideologies and their adherents are one and the same.
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Stars and Stripes @starsandstripes.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
The U.S. has burned through so many munitions during the Iran conflict that it now faces shortfalls, compounded by bottlenecks in its industrial base limiting its ability to resupply, military officials told the Pentagon’s watchdog agency. www.stripes.com/theaters/us/...
stripes.com
Iran war exposed US munitions shortfalls and production bottlenecks, Pentagon IG says
The most persistent bottlenecks involve the production of solid rocket motors and the availability of high-grade explosives, the report said.
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Shiv Ramdas Mens Rice Activist @nameshiv.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
history is genuinely going to look back on this era and ask what a society has to do to be debauched enough to freely elect an admin whose no 1 agenda was international protection of and solidarity with sexual assaulters irrespective of the species they assaulted
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
ed shoulda known better than to get mixed up with handjob bob
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Don Moynihan @donmoyn.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
The TL
top: story that Pete Hesegth wants only fit troops around him for speech
bottom - imgae of Trump wiping his nose, hair, in quick succession
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
oh no, I can’t believe I won’t get to see kid rock puke on himself at the kennedy center
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The Volatile Mermaid @ohnoshetwitnt.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Better headline: Giant stupid lying piss-baby didn’t get his way so he ruined everything for everyone.
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
I hesitate to post this because all the Jews and Muslims I know truly love bacon
Epic handshake meme: Jews, Muslims: wrong about bacon
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Lumber Jackson @millburray.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
*desperately trying to explain to my girlfriend why her mom’s pussy is so wet* I’m a desiccan not a desiccant
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