𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 07/10/2026I guess I need a place to put my thoughts. Using lump.substack.com but it’s long form. What’s best for me is a place to vent where not many people can see me, anyway. I don’t like “lumpfished” anymore but also don’t want to have to start over.lump.substack.comlump waz here | Substacklump waz here. Click to read lump waz here, a Substack publication. Launched 4 years ago. 120
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 18/04/2026On leaving tpot, and unlearning self-blameopen.substack.comWhen A Door Is Closed For YouOn leaving tpot, and unlearning self-blame 130
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 20/02/2026Doing better. Music helps. youtu.be/GOQFWGiJqWI?...youtu.beJeangu Macrooy - Independent Girls & Nasty Evil Gays (official video)YouTube video by Jeangu Macrooy 000
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 20/02/2026Usually I would use substances (alcohol, weed) but I’m rawdogging the emotions now It’s not so much suicidal fixation as it is my nervous system is overclocked and this causes a cascade of suicidal thoughts 020
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 19/02/2026This is not “I am going to kill myself” it’s “I desire relief from the intense emotions” 000
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 19/02/2026System is on overload. The only thing my brain is doing is wishing it were dead. 000
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 19/02/2026My life has been very intense, but at least it’s not boring However, I would prefer boring now 010
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 19/02/2026Read an article about status and realized I’m incredibly low status for several reasons 100
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 19/02/2026I wish I did not think through things so much and then try to parse it through a political lense 000
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 19/02/2026I struggle with distraction and then hyperfocus on the wrong things 000
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 19/02/2026the cat is lying on me and kneading/biting my boob, which makes sense, but is also somewhat painful 000
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 18/02/2026All my bad mental habits seem to be picking back up… shit 000
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 17/02/2026I would love to consume something which will cause me to be inebriated. Alas 000
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 17/02/2026Many times a diagnosis can provide an answer to the eternal question “Why am I like this” But I’ve personally had several diagnoses over the past 20 years, some even in conflict with each other. It changes as prescribers and therapists change. The answer for me isn’t clear 100
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 17/02/2026I missed several doses of a medication due to not getting a refill quite in time, I am very likely having withdrawals. I have the med now but damn I am crashing out. Medium level, not extreme. Still manageable. 110
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 17/02/2026I feel selfish for wanting as much community support as I do 110
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 17/02/2026Perhaps the community support I need is to be proportional to the community harms But that’s impossible 110
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 17/02/2026I want my pain to be acknowledged by others, but have learned most people don’t care, or care and don’t know what to say, or say something and then leave or keep a distance 110
Reposted by 𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠Emma Evans @trance.bsky.social · 16/02/2026MANY OF YOU are not *normally* this way, just the ongoing crisis and traumas and world tilt is creating a hypervigilance state that is doing you psychic and physical damage. So yeah, take a breath and figure out if it actually impacts you, to what level it impacts you personally and what you can 1194
Reposted by 𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠donni saphire @donni.bsky.social · 16/02/2026Sometimes I get a little upset when I live in a collapsing dystopia for many years 174424965
Reposted by 𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠Josiah Hawthorne @josiahhawthorne.bsky.social · 16/02/2026Things I'll have to give up in order to fast from social media next month: --hypervigilance --the need to be The One Who Knows What's Going On --the illusion that I will have the perfect thing to say which will alter the course of the Goings On --a sense of audience in the humdrum of daily life 3322
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 17/02/2026I just threw my trash into the trash can from a distance and made it in. please clap 030
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 17/02/2026I’m watching the Epstein documentary on Netflix and I shouldn’t be. It is reaggravating to my system. Yet at the same time, I see the pattern. It validates the pattern. I am not a minor. What happened to me didn’t happen when I was a minor. But what happened still follows a pattern. 120
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 17/02/2026The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return 011
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 17/02/2026Some of us do not have as easy a path to joy and happiness as our brains have beaten down desire paths set down when we desired self destruction 120
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 17/02/2026in the narrow reality tunnel where I am worthless and nothing matters 020
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 16/02/2026The “I wish I were dead” thoughts are pretty consistent and loud tonight 000
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 16/02/2026What does a girl have to post on here to get any kind of engagement 210
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 15/02/2026I deactivated twitter again, gonna try posting here instead 020
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 14/02/2026If you don’t like Valentine’s Day you can always celebrate my birthday instead 000
𝓵𝓾𝓶𝓹 🐠 @lumpfished.bsky.social · 01/02/2026I am getting $24 a month in foodstamps! Finally, I can afford to eat 040
