girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 15/03/2026I still can’t believe I scored an advance copy of @shanders.bsky.social new book but can I say my expectations couldn’t have been higher And she’s exceeding them 5211
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 11/03/2026I don’t get on Blue Sky much anymore because they want me to verify my age to read my DMs which is insane? Like I am an adult? I don’t understand why I need to prove that, and before you hit me with the “but we need to protect minors” it’s nonsensical to restrict DMs only 3170
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 26/02/2026My hottest take that I’ve been gatekeeping for a long time is that we are angry at the wrong people when we complain about our aging mothers, mothers in law, and other matriarch figures We played them like a deck of cards and it’s no wonder they’re acting outopen.substack.comIn Defense of Your Problematic Mother-in-LawNo wonder our foremothers are doing the spiritual equivalent of driving through the living room at Christmas Eve dinner. 2132
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 22/01/2026“This shift, combined with a move toward smaller family sizes, is complicated further by distinctly Millennial concerns about “parentifying” teens by asking for any help with younger siblings.open.substack.comBring Back the Teen BabysittersI'm advocating for the return of character- and skill-building. 4234
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 09/01/2026Mothers in this country can’t even fucking DIE without some of yall heaping shame on their parenting 2462
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 03/01/2026Hey @lindsaynicolle.bsky.social the Cavs are playing the Nuggets let’s fight? (Be friends and go to bed as soon as the game is over) 280
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 29/12/2025My husband, skeptical that I will Aldi too close to the sun for NYE: Listen the list says Tostitos Scoops okay please do not get like Clancy’s Schmoops 4341
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 26/12/2025He has taken more pics of the brisket than the children 🤣 Merry merry Christmas 4490
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 21/12/2025Pray for me my kid just told mall Santa all she wants is a hyper specific item she has never once shown an interest in prior to today 4540
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 20/12/2025Hating kids is so embarrassing. Like your enemy is really 3 feet tall and holding a Bluey plush? You have real beef with someone who tried to feed a toy truck Cheerios 0403
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 14/12/2025You COULD do drugs or you could finish a super healing and difficult marathon to the emotional crescendo of TYRANT by Beyoncé which is stronger than drugs 2200
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 14/12/2025Before and after If you ran HNL I’ll see u at the doctor next week for trench foot 0260
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 13/12/2025I blurted out “oh my god tiktok I love you so much” which is a normal and cool thing to do 0260
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 13/12/2025My sweet gem of a 72 year old mother told me, with great concern, that my 5yo “took a huge dump” on the pool deck Friends, she meant she tripped. Talk about bringing a very different energy 😂 (She’s ok!) 3310
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 11/12/2025“You can’t have a village if you don’t want to be a villager” is bullshit here I wrote about whyopen.substack.comDon't Blame the VillagersIs everyone just too flaky and selfish these days to show up for each other? Or is something else going on? 2181
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 06/12/2025Pitch meeting for Pedialyte popsicles “Ok, imagine a popsicle. It’s for sick children.” 🙂↕️🙂↕️🙂↕️ “You need scissors to get it open. And to eat it, you need the dexterity and patience to push just enough of the popsicle out of the plastic to eat but not so much it flies out and makes a mess.” 🤩🤩🤩 2230
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 01/12/2025“Teach your 2 year old toddler to sit quietly and respectfully, you checked out parents!” Post the MAGA Boomers as the president of the United Stayes calls a sitting governor the r-word in a nonsensical screed. 1190
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 30/11/2025The last indignity of norovirus is I cannot take these kids anywhere because I don’t want to spread it. They have been in the house for like 5 straight days, have taken everything completely apart, have reached the whining stage of bored, and 1230
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 30/11/2025Every time I get norovirus - literally every single time - I’m like what is this eldritch horror? This must be an ancient plague! There is no way this is the stomach flu of my youth, I must be patient zero of something truly horrible. Alert the CDC 3240
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 30/11/2025Our family all got norovirus in brutal succession over Thanksgiving and whew I am salty about it 1220
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 27/11/2025It’s @yusufahmed.bsky.social first organized race so we brought headwinds, snow, ice, freezing temps and steep elevation to the party 😂💪🏼🫶🏼 0200
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 25/11/2025Reading bios on Blue Sky is so funny - it’s always like NO CRYPTO STRIPPER SEX DMS I am HAPPILY MARRIED also RESIST 1230
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 24/11/2025I did my 20 mile run today and absolutely ate pavement at mile 15, like completely busted my ass, but! I am so lazy, so absurdly lazy, that I just finished the final 5 of the run with my bloody knee and hands bc running 15 a different day just to get to 20 sounded worse TW knee pic in replies 3280
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 24/11/2025Can anyone who has seen wicked for good give me the lowdown on appropriateness for my wicked obsessed 5yo 330
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 23/11/2025It’s so funny to see people ANALYZE why Trump fawned over Zohran Mamdani and it’s literally because he’s an old man who watches news TV all day and the man from the TV came to see him which was very exciting 2044871
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 23/11/2025Me, driving home from Thanksgiving where my kids ate so much: okay, bedtime when we get home My kids: aren’t you going to give us dinner 2430
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 22/11/2025My husband knows my love language (never ever speaking to anyone) 0371
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 22/11/2025Yes, I am trying to make the best of the fact that I don’t have a full time job right now. Maybe I was a little too good at it. No, it is not ever a “privilege” or a “vacation” to not have a job and need one 1582
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 22/11/2025Y’all the tech bros have moved out of quarter zip season and into puffy vest season, which precedes wool overcoat season by about 45 days 3280
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 20/11/2025Getting pretty fucking tired of the President of the United States getting away with shit that would get someone fired from any even entry level job 111421
Reposted by girl fieriJohn Moe @johnmoe.bsky.social · 18/11/2025I can no longer follow the plot of this show. I suspect the writers and actors can’t either. I don’t think they have a show runner. 2595323857
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 18/11/2025We need to stop talking about Trumps outbursts as questions or propriety and start framing them in terms of mental fitness 1263
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 18/11/2025Today at @thepom.bsky.social I join @kristenmulrooney.bsky.social to review HBO Doc Thoughts and Prayers - previews tonight. Link in replies 1204
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 16/11/2025I have spent 38 years not giving a fuck about what MTG thinks and let’s just say I hate to snap a streak 19310
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 16/11/2025One time when toddlers absolutely have you by the balls is when they decide to simply sit down on the floor in protest. In public? There is no dignified way out of that for you 4230
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 16/11/2025I am actually pretty strict about my kids’ behavior in public - I can’t abide the idea of them bothering anyone and will always remove them if they’re having a hard time sitting quietly at a show. 2511
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 15/11/2025Taking a freshly potty trained toddler all over Manhattan I’m Lauren Ahmed, welcome to Jackass 31593
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 12/11/2025One other thing about using a prolonged government shutdown as a mechanism for policy: it can’t only be deployed in service of policies you like and want. If we embrace the ethos of minority parties turning up the pain on people who largely did not 250
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 12/11/2025It’s cold cold now - not jk cold, cold enough that the lake effect hardened northerners are starting to take notice 3180
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 11/11/2025Finishing a lengthy library book before I have to return it always makes me feel like the most powerful being on earth 2693
Reposted by girl fieriBad Samaritan @hurricanealice.bsky.social · 10/11/2025In addition to the selfish desire for me to be able to feed myself and my family, the other thing that really scared me was the possibility of a major air disaster. I don't care who would've been "blamed" for it. It's a tragedy that I hope we avoided. 131
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 10/11/2025I am not defending Chuck Schumer, but I do think it is slightly more reasonable than we give credit to say that we cannot allow starving Americans, withholding their pay, and compromising their safety to become the way we do policy here. Saying “we were winning!” - no one wins when kids go hungry. 14335
Reposted by girl fieriAnjali Dayal @anjalikdayal.bsky.social · 09/11/2025look I know being an engaged citizen IS the work of democracy but it is also the work of elected officials not to create situations where everyone has to be mobilized all the time to prevent them from allowing some kind of Dickensian horror on a Sunday night while you're in between loads of laundry 3039811255
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 09/11/2025It is the job of the president to provide the necessary leadership to keep the government open Keep repeating it 2433
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 09/11/2025I have a new instant pot and it doesn’t look exactly like my old instant pot so I sometimes look at it and then just decide best not to risk it 71490
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 08/11/2025I am not going to participate in the question of whether women belong at work in a country where the job market and wages are so shitty I’m frankly wondering if our family needs a THIRD income 0321
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 08/11/2025Charlotte was fun and also I have never been to a city whose downtown is so deserted It’s like walking through a movie set 3260
girl fieri @laureneahmed.bsky.social · 06/11/2025Doing the bravest thing someone can do (arriving first on a girls trip with other moms during virus season) 0211
