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Old Man Detroit River

@josephslowvak.bsky.social
156 followers 177 following 94 posts

Aging Disgracefully // Ancient DCFC supporter // On the super secret member rolls for NGS // Husband to K // Father to Coraline // Terrible golfer // Beer league hockey hero // Tifo painter // Just here for the chronologically ordered luke-warm takes

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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 31/03/2026
Believe it or not, there was a time when Detroit City FC was the Open Cup underdog against the Bucks. When we started, we lived in their shadow. They had the history, the results, the reputation for slaying giants.
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 23/02/2026
Calling all Detroit City FC supporters! We've got 19 days until the USL home opener and 1,200 square feet of tifo to paint. WE NEED YOUR HELP! Come join us for tifo painting. All supporters, all ages, all skill levels welcome! Find out more at www.noonelikes.us/tifo #dctid
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 06/11/2025
Do you ever have one of those bands that you kind of forgot about and then one day they pop into your feed and you're like "holy shit, these guys are incredible! Why haven't I been listening to them more?" For me, today, it is Samiam. What band is that for you lately?
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 22/10/2025
Break up @ticketmaster.com now! You can't tell me that every seat for this concert that I'm trying to take my daughter to is sold out, and somehow miraculously all the definitely real people who bought those tickets listed them on the official resale site (for 2x+ more than face value, of course).
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 23/09/2025
Antifa isn't a group, it is an idea. It is one shared by all people who do not want to live under a fascist regime. Do you believe in free speech? That's antifa. Do you support universal suffrage and the right of all Americans to freely elect our leaders? That's antifa.
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 30/08/2025
There's no joy in Mudville.
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 21/08/2025
I'm not sure if there's a heaven or not, but I'm very confident that if there is, Mr. Dobson is not there. No benevolent God would ever accept such hatred into their Kingdom.
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 31/07/2025
Current mood:
media.tenor.com
a man in a suit and tie stands in front of a vander escch jersey
ALT: a man in a suit and tie stands in front of a vander escch jersey
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Northern Guard Supporters @ngsdetroit.bsky.social · 27/07/2025
1-🆙 🍄
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Detroit City FC @detcityfc.com · 22/07/2025
Thank you, Trevor. Your leadership transformed Detroit City FC and helped shape our club’s identity. We are forever grateful. Stay tuned as we share some unforgettable moments from Trevor’s years at the helm. 📰: www.detcityfc.com/news/2025/07...
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 10/07/2025
Hartford is just a rest stop for people driving between Boston and New York.
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 07/07/2025
Calling all #DCFC supporters. Here are the tifo times for this week. We've got a mega-huge project in the works and WE NEED YOUR HELP. All are welcome. Hit me with questions, or find more info at noonelikes.us/tifo #DCTID
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 30/06/2025
It's been a couple weeks since we unveiled this year's @ngsdetroit.bsky.social pride tifo and I'm still in awe of how amazing it turned out. The design and execution are some of the best work we've ever done and the message; holy shit. Everyone who worked on this should be incredibly proud.
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 29/05/2025
I know they were just being friendly, but every time someone said "Good morning" to us today at Total Wine, I felt just a tiny bit judged. 😂
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 26/05/2025
Just got done watching Mallrats for the first time in years. I'd forgotten how wordy those early Kevin Smith movies were. It was like an Aaron Sorkin movie with more dick jokes.
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 25/05/2025
The tifo for the @detcityfc.com men's and women's openers truly were works of art. From the incredible designs by Paul and Anji to scores of volunteers who helped bring them to life, I can't say enough about how proud I am to be a part of @ngsdetroit.bsky.social
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 25/05/2025
Current mood:
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a woman in a suit is saying everything hurts and i 'm dying
ALT: a woman in a suit is saying everything hurts and i 'm dying
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Steve Cavendish @scavendish.bsky.social · 11/05/2025
At the Nashville SC game, a giant flag for La Brigada de Oro, the Latino supporters section, which is not here tonight due to ICE activity. NSC officials tried to remove it, but were met with vehement objections by supporters clubs, who threatened a giant walkout if they did.
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 08/05/2025
How long until Trump puts 397% tariffs against the Vatican on Bibles, communion wafers and Popemobiles because he's angry they picked someone else?
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 07/05/2025
Shots on @law-dog.bsky.social tomorrow at the DCFC tailgate!
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 17/04/2025
Technically, it's later right now.
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a man wearing a suit and tie is standing in a field of yellow flowers
ALT: a man wearing a suit and tie is standing in a field of yellow flowers
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 13/04/2025
Over? It's not over!
media.tenor.com
a man in a red shirt is talking to another man and says `` was it over when the germans bombed pearl harbor ''
ALT: a man in a red shirt is talking to another man and says `` was it over when the germans bombed pearl harbor ''
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 27/03/2025
People who clap after the plane lands should immediately, and permanently, be put on the no-fly list.
media.tenor.com
a man in a military uniform stands at a podium in front of a group of people
ALT: a man in a military uniform stands at a podium in front of a group of people
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 26/03/2025
I'm at that age where, after a long day, I desperately need to sit down, but am afraid to because I may not be able to get up again.
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Niko Stratis @nikostratis.com · 19/03/2025
Everybody says they would go back in time and kill baby hitler, but i don’t know, that feels wrong to me. I mean come on, a baby? That’s disgusting. Sharks, that’s why I’m here today with an idea: give me the money i need to go back in time and kill teen hitler
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Northern Guard Supporters @ngsdetroit.bsky.social · 11/03/2025
Always. Forever. ↙️↙️↙️
A banner showing three arrows down and to the left and one that says Fuck ICE
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 11/03/2025
Say what you will about Trump's economic policies, but he is delivering on his promise to bring prices down. Tesla stock prices are cheaper than ever!
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 26/02/2025
A guy just said "If you build a better mousetrap, you'll just catch a bigger idiot" in a work meeting and I'm now unable to concentrate on any actual business. I'm done for the day. 💀
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 26/02/2025
I can't work like this. The culprits must be found and punished.
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 25/02/2025
I don't know who keeps leaving the coffee pots at work like this, but I hope someone does, and that it shows up in their performance review.
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 20/02/2025
Without DEI initiatives, Elle Woods would have never gotten into Harvard Law School. Is that the America that you want to live in?
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 19/02/2025
I am 1000% in support of curbing defense spending, but I do not in any way trust these morons to do it in a way that doesn't horribly erode our national security and position of strength in this world. I'm also not convinced that this directive isn't at the behest of their friend in Moscow.
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 19/02/2025
The same people who were B I G M A D about Democratic policies to make school lunches more healthy are getting really loud today about how great they think it is for Trump to tell you what you can buy with your SNAP benefits.
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Hannah Who @notablyuncool.bsky.social · 19/02/2025
Being a trans ally means action. Vote. Volunteer. Protest. Speak up. But also: Amplify trans voices. Pay trans people. Donate to trans orgs. Create jobs and safe spaces for trans people. Stop thinking words are enough.
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 12/02/2025
Eggs are $9 a dozen at the grocery store in my neighborhood, but at least we got Google Maps to start calling it the Gulf of America, amirite? #winning
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 12/02/2025
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 11/02/2025
Current mood:
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a man stands at a bar with a sign that says ' turn a negative into a positive '
ALT: a man stands at a bar with a sign that says ' turn a negative into a positive '
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 10/02/2025
Hey Snoop, if you are so upset about all the hate that you had to make a commercial about it, maybe you should have passed on performing at an inaugural ball for the fascist in the White House stoking it a couple weeks ago.
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 04/02/2025
The grand opening of the new Raising Cane's in Canton is tomorrow morning. As of 7 p.m., there was already a line of people waiting. The chicken can't be that good, right?
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Robbie Rist @robbierist.bsky.social · 30/01/2025
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 27/01/2025
I was just thinking about how we take so much modern technology for granted, and remembered the time I drove from Oklahoma to Orlando and back one weekend with nothing but some printed out MapQuest directions. How the hell did we do anything or get anywhere without a smart phone?
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The Nutmeg News @thenutmegnews.com · 24/01/2025
American Outlaws To Hold Hearings On Influence Of Communist Atheists And DEI Advocates Within The USMNT Fanbase www.thenutmegnews.com/current/2025...
thenutmegnews.com
American Outlaws To Hold Hearings On Influence Of Communist Atheists And DEI Advocates Within The USMNT Fanbase — The Nutmeg News
NEBRASKA - In advance of the 2026 World Cup, the American Outlaws (the United States Men’s Supporters Group) announced that they would be holding hearings on the influence of Communist Atheists and DE...
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 23/01/2025
I find the humor in it when my friends, family, and even my daughter make cracks about my age, but Lenawee County getting in on the joke is too far.
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 23/01/2025
Translation: To stay rich, you need to go along to get along. Fuck the poors, let them eat each other.
nytimes.com
Jamie Dimon, JPMorgan Chase CEO, Backs Trump’s Tariffs, Saying ‘Get Over It’
The JPMorgan Chase chief executive, who had warned of the negative effect of tariffs, said they could be justified for national security reasons.
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 23/01/2025
I've been searching for inspiration for weeks now, trying to find the right idea for a project. Of course, the light bulb goes on at 1 a.m. on a damn weekday. Hopefully it all will come back to me tomorrow when I actually have the time.
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 23/01/2025
Remind me again what the Bible has to say about love and compassion. Don't remember? Let me paraphrase Matthew for you: ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did not do for me.’ But sure, let's cut welfare and kick out immigrants
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Nomad Matt @nomadmatt.bsky.social · 21/01/2025
For those saying it wasn't a Nazi salute. Keep posting it. Keep sharing it.
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 11/01/2025
So Prince Humperdinck and the Six Fingered Man were totally into each other, right?
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 11/01/2025
When I was your age, television was called books!
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Old Man Detroit River @josephslowvak.bsky.social · 17/11/2024
One of my favorite holiday traditions is where K and I watch ridiculous Christmas movies trying to find the craziest and most absurd. It's still only November but #HotFrosty may be hard to top.
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