John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 08/09/2026People fear the chupacabra but that’s because they haven’t seen the chupapoopa. 020
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 14/08/2026She looks so wise and thoughtful and sad, like every Neil Young song rolled into one. It’s a pity that her only thought is, “Can I grab a snack from the cat’s litter box before Daddy can clean it?” 070
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 14/08/2026Renaming Coco Madame Blavatsky, as one does. 2121
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 04/07/2026“I just washed my soil and I can’t do a thing with it!” 010
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 02/07/2026Noted suckup Frank J. Bisignano, misadministrator for SSA is at it again in case you missed it. Warning: do NOT play the take a drink every time he mentions Trump drinking game. 010
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 19/06/2026We got fuchsia which I hadn’t noticed before 110
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 15/06/2026I object to clickbait if anything even more vociferously if it comes from my side. Fundamentally, morally, it’s wrong. Just say what you’re saying, no all caps, no grimacing photos, no caught red handed. Don’t be THEM. Be better. Anyone posting or reposting anything like this gets blocked. 000
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 11/06/2026There are 9M Jehovah’s Witnesses. Is that how Big G has stayed out of the pokey this long? Also, since they’re Witnesses and all, if they say Jesus looked like Mamdani, who am I to argue? 000
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 08/06/2026She’s a little nuisance and I should know; I’m a big oldsance. 000
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 29/04/2026Coco chihuahua: she’s a perfect angel. But then, so was Lucifer. 020
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 18/04/2026I believe it to be a zen koan, and if I wait here long enough, enlightenment will arrive, if not patient privacy. The other CVS patients will have to use the drive through if they want to pick up their prescriptions this week. 010
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 18/02/2026Local white supremacist refuses to recant views. Also asserts that, Cats rule, dogs drool.” 050
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 18/01/2026This is our cat! He wants royalties! And scritches! And outside! And the YouTube all squirrel channel! 240
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 01/01/2026Yeah, we know. There’s a whole building-full at the White House. 021
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 08/11/2025Oh boy! Linen cereal! Part of this complete breakfast! 020
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 02/11/2025Speaking as a notary, I can’t say that I approve. 020
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 21/10/2025Rick Scott: as good at unintended irony as he is at growing hair: 020
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 29/08/2025Leaping to the very top of the ever-lengthening “what were the OTHER names you considered?” list: 020
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 24/06/2025Was I in Sartre’s Supermarket or Schrödinger’s? 050
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 08/06/2025Hell, if you fix the fucking pepper mill, I’ll pay full price. 030
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 10/05/2025Costco mockingbird. I was really expecting a package of five. 020
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 03/05/2025The new raisin-dealing anthropomorphic sunburst on raisin bran boxes looks like he’s on drugs. On the other hand, I believe he previously wore sunglasses (in spite of being, you know, THE SUN) so maybe he just isn’t on the down low anymore. 241
John Dantzler @johnmdantzler.bsky.social · 30/04/2025Note to Apple: get this shit off the weather app: 041