iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

John Lyon

@johnlyon.bsky.social

4K followers 912 following 672 posts

Opinions expressed here are not the opinions of my employer. They are the opinions of Elvis Presley as relayed to me telepathically by the inhabitants of Venus. bsky.app/profile/did:plc:nvcwxxjti7…

Posts Replies Media

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

Me: Hey gas tank, check out the prices on this pump. Gas tank:

A gas tank opening that resembles a shocked face.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

Moira Rose saying, “Great question.”

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

Ghosts at play.

A sign that says “SLOW PLEASE” and shows two figures on a seesaw. Behind it is a cemetery.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

Michael Scott saying “Thank you.”

000

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

Neil deGrasse Tyson.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 13/09/2026

Welcome to Overexplaining Club. Please bend your knees and lower your bottom onto a chair to sit down.

Sign: “Please turn the door knob to enter the office.”

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 09/09/2026

Me, thinking about the time the cashier said, “Come back soon,” and I said, “You too.”

A cat looking regretful.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 16/08/2026

Captain America saying, “I understood that reference.”

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

Dwight Schrute saying, “Go on.”

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 04/08/2026

This feels like a trap.

A door with a sign that just says “DOOR.”

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 29/07/2026

Captain America saying, “I understood that reference.”

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 22/07/2026

🎵 Someday we’ll find it, the

A magazine titled “Costco Connection.”

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 15/07/2026

My wife: It was on sale. The sale:

An Amazon listing stating that the price of an item has been reduced by $0.01.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 26/06/2026

Can’t wait for the guys to see my new rock climbing outfit.

An Amazon ad that shows a woman rock climbing in a miniskirt and sports bra, with a caption that says “Discover men’s fashion for every occasion.”

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 30/05/2026

When the JCPenney photographer says to look casual.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 22/05/2026

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 20/05/2026

“How do you do, fellow French people?”

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 16/05/2026

I don’t know where they dig people up to work here.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 15/05/2026

It just was…off…

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 06/05/2026

Finally figured out the solution to unwanted visitors.

A porch with no door opening into the house.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 26/04/2026

You have to understand, a lot of things seemed extreme to us in the 90s. It was a more innocent time.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 09/04/2026

My face when I’m watching the news.

A weary-looking cat.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 31/03/2026

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 25/03/2026

Book Gets Rave Review From People Trying To Sell You Book

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 17/03/2026

If you’re going to mispronounce something, please do it correctly.

Book cover: Correct Mispronunciations of Some South Carolina Names

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 13/03/2026

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 07/03/2026

Is that a Kit Kat bar in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

A bear-shaped Kit Kat bar that, when viewed upside-down, suggests a phallus.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 23/02/2026

Is it cars? I bet it’s cars.

The Science Behind What Causes Traffic

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 12/02/2026

I would consider this grounds for divorce.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 31/01/2026

🎵 Al-al-alamo 🎵

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 27/01/2026

Think of all the tips lost.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 21/01/2026

Your outie trusts the accuracy of AI.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 13/01/2026

Same stylist?

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 31/12/2025

Always read the fine print.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 02/12/2025

“I. Know how to use periods”

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 16/11/2025

When I misread the signs and think my cat wants a nose boop.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 11/11/2025

Another unrealistic body standard for women.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 16/09/2025

I have no idea what they do in there, but I’m sure it’s fabulous.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 27/08/2025

Leeches applied upon request.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 23/07/2025

The budget cuts to Starfleet have been especially sad to see.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 10/06/2025

The Wall Street Journal had better make room on the shelf for another Pulitzer.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 22/05/2025

“I can see what you’re doing with your right hand. That’s uncalled for, Susan.”

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 07/05/2025

When I’m asked to get snacks for the party.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 09/04/2025

“No, Mr. Bond. I expect you to die.”

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 03/04/2025

Same, spatula. Same.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 12/02/2025

I have never related to anyone more.

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 19/12/2024