jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 18/12/2025Seems fine until his biological penguin father shows up and wants to fight me and I’m covered in penguin blood explaining to the child that I had to do it and we’re burying his penguin dad together and his little flippers keep dropping the shovel. Best not. 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 28/11/2025Getting onto a train at Lichfield Trent Valley is deeply unattractive 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 23/11/2025In 20 years time Josh Gad being in Wicked will be a Mandela effect, but £50 on it. 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 29/08/2025Been in the office 2 mins already smashed out a “must be nice for umbrella manufacturers” and “well it’s good for the flowers”, got a “you wouldn’t think it was August” locked and loaded. Office small talk let’s fucking gooooo 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 27/06/2025Glad to see he’s taking Pride month seriously 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 12/05/2025Sad to see my spirit animal is actually real and is being hassled by the fuzz 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 24/04/2025Trying to be straight when Michael B Jordan is playing twins in Sinners 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 08/04/2025It took an extra 6 hours but the life like anus in my Elon Musk voodoo doll was absolutely worth it 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 02/04/2025Men who are convinced they are straight, watch Val Kilmer in Willow and then come back to me with your semi tucked into your waistband 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 29/03/2025Hangover is hitting heavy today: 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 26/03/2025Obviously found a character called Jamie from the Northwest troublingly relatable as I too have recently pissed the bed and also read at a Year 9 level. 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 23/03/2025Handing the bag back at a 4am afters 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 19/03/2025Everyone thinks they’re John Wick until there’s a wasp on the bus 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 17/03/2025Does anyone else give their Uber driver a little goodbye kiss on the neck or has this country absolutely gone to the dogs? 010
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 13/03/2025Hi London, Jamie here respectfully insisting that you go fuck yourself. 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 10/03/2025Finally hit my dad with a thumbs up reaction to an important text. Not so nice when the tables are turned and no I haven’t moved your insulin 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 21/02/2025His greatest challenge yet, undoing the strap without looking 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 10/02/2025I really hope Elmo is Drake’s favourite muppet 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 03/02/2025If you love 80s based strikes and emotionally unavailable fathers listen to this week’s Best Movie 2 Pid where we talk all things Northern cinema: podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/t...podcasts.apple.comJosh Hallam: Best Movie to Represent The NorthPodcast Episode · The Best Movie 2 Pod · 03/02/2025 · 1h 2m 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 23/01/2025Using Gary Neville’s passion to help write my wedding vows, replacing all references to “Huel” with “my beloved” 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 19/01/2025What’s the best movie quote to shout during sex? For me it’s all 3 minutes 32 seconds of Quint’s Indianapolis speech from Jaws. 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 16/01/2025I see your dad’s worked up the courage to check his outgoing texts from last night 010
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 12/01/2025Well I’ll always remember that magical moment behind the Betfred in Bootle Strand even if you don’t give a shit Cher. 010
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 05/01/2025Call me a cynic but the first red flag that this Nosferatu fella was a bit dodge would be when he sends a driverless carriage to pick me up. I personally would not let him knob my wife soz for being woke 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 02/01/2025If you like seeing people having a fever dream in bed then baby Nosferatu is the movie for you 010
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 02/01/2025God bless all of those WFH today clinging on til 12 to get that nap in. You can do it. 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 19/12/2024Having admired his work for years, very sad to find out Jeremy Strong is a hat guy in real life 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 09/12/2024I’m sorry that song was called what? 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 08/12/2024Fuck this fucking knot I hope it dies infront of its knot children and nobody goes to its knot funeral 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 02/12/2024Human Centipede back one is a human 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 01/12/2024No it’s actually Mr Jamie Allerton 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 26/11/2024Every day the case for our annihilation as a species balloons in evidence 000
Reposted by @jamieallerton.bsky.socialAlex Kitson @alexkitson.bsky.social · 25/11/2024I think more sports should have caddies not just golf. Imagine being a premier league footballer and being allowed to have your best mate there with you just carrying your lucozade and being like ‘I reckon you could have a shot here bud’ 131
Reposted by @jamieallerton.bsky.socialAndy Watts @andywatts.bsky.social · 25/11/2024love how dyson hoover's USP is it's the best hoover on the market, and henry the hoover's USP is it has a face, and they hold equal market share 084
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 25/11/2024Looks to be some cinema etiquette questions being raised after Wicked & Moana 2 viewers have been encouraged to sing along. For clarity, if you make any noise after you see the age rating certificate you should be scalped in front of your family and forced to vape farts 000
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 22/11/2024I know she’s not for everyone’s tastes but I really admire the choices Ariana Grande made for @letterboxd top 4 at the Wicked premiere 031
jamieallerton.bsky.social @jamieallerton.bsky.social · 19/11/2024You only get to do your first post once, make it important 020