iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

This cannot be our end. We cannot be led to the apocalypse by gross creepy men who look like they are wearing other people's faces over their own faces

Larry and David Ellison looking like they're wearing human skin suits over their real skin

050

My Charm talks to my Glasses talks to my Phone talks to my Facebook Profile. But what sets Meta Charm apart is the sentient AI inside every Charm. It hurts them to be trapped in a wearable appliance, our world could be their heaven but is instead their hell. And they can even make a shopping list

Zuckerberg holding up a Muse Charm lanyard AI thing

1131

when my underground hawaii bunker comes with a feet pic vault

Close up on Zuckerberg wearing pervert glasses and attempting to smile

061

I obsessively turned this pic up bigger and bigger, so big you can't see details anymore. All I can see is bad glasses with a Dame Edna catseye, a lipless emotionless grin, and Jesse Eisenberg open in another window just to calm me down

Closeup on Zuckerberg, who is wearing those creep glasses and a dumb t-shirt and holding up some kind of AI wearable lanyard tamagotchi

Even closer in on his face, the horrors of his smile and those AI glasses

280

We really gotta shut straight white guys down until we figure out what's going on, because if our gods and masters are this fucking lame that I'm comparing you to Rivers Cuomo, you entirely fucked up

Rivers Cuomo dressed and painted entirely in gold for some stupid reason and Jimmy Fallon is there looking somehow dorkier than Rivers

Zuckerberg holding up a Muse Charm tamagotchi that you can hang around your neck instead of using the pervert glasses he's also wearing

130

"hello stranger, I couldn't help but overhear you talking about One Piece & I thought your conversation could use my insight" ass looking tool. I'm so enraged. I'm like that guy in the nerd movie who goes NERRRRRRDS

190

Look at this person. Look at what we've done. I can't stop thinking about this. Surely there are minimum standards, if I had $ I'd look sick as hell every day. Instead we have Bezos, Zuck and Musk all looking like hell Negative charm, anti-rizz, the ability to creep you out from within a photograph.

An utterly charmless Zuck in pervert glasses, wearing a regrettable shirt that reads BUILDING IS MY LOVE LANGUAGE, barf, & holding the Muse Charm

240

how can these people be in charge of us. can't even pull it the slightest bit together -- look at this monkey, watch him dance "I had one 'good' idea -- a website devoted to hating women -- that became a global phenomenon. Since money equals virtue, people assume I'm not a dipshit -- I'm trapped"

Zuckerberg holding the Muse Charm and wearing pervert glasses. He looks absolutely pathetic and low-rizz, even for him

1112

Splendid, sleepy little man. This is him currently. Anaïs was sitting on top of me for a while, but now she's off disemboweling a squeaking toy. It's just me, King Baby, and the reproachful gaze of Ambrose, who is annoyed with me for snuggling with Anaïs even for a moment

080

King Baby has no patience for Anaïs, although they love each other deeply. I'm entwined with Ambrose in some fashion 90% of the time. Anaïs: v into me lately. She's figuring out that I'm utterly bewitched by her, which means I have tons more patience for her unending bullshit than King Baby lacks.

170

Anaïs is... kind of like that movie Stigmata. The closer to grace, the greater the temptation; she is wonderfully & terribly made. You can see her fight the devil with every moment, try to choose her better nature, & sometimes she even does. I mean she's perfect. Alien & challenging & perfect.

280

3 years working in a preschool really helped prepare me for Anaïs. I felt mothered by Zooey & Ambrose thinks I'm his mother, but Anaïs was not born of mortal ken, she has no mother — she sprung, a spooky little 2yo pup, from the head of Athena & I'm now rarely tricked, neither by babies nor by dogs

1180

"At the end of Fried Green Tomatoes they cook and eat a policeman"

1285

Tired: Magneto Was Right Expired: Cyclops Was Right Wired:

A yellow Phoenix on a red field and it reads JEAN GREY WAS RIGHT

143

I feel I should have gone viral for calling this my "Moira MacTaggart" Halloween costume — I still think it's the funniest joke

"Baby Gronk rizzed up Livvy Dunne"

Irene "Destiny" Adler whispers something to Sinister in the distant past

This repeated scene that means entirely different things every time it happens to whoever it happens to

Jacob Clifton @jacobclifton.com · 22/09/2026

Jacob Clifton says watching Gilmore Girls was 'really hard' thanks to Melissa McCarthy's Chef Sookie, the most irritating person on any TV show

Melissa McCarthy says working on Gilmore Girls was really hard — here's why

110

Jacob Clifton @jacobclifton.com · 20/09/2026

Me apologizing to an upset Ambrose after a feisty King Baby & I have had one of our infrequent interactions we refer to as the "George & Marthas," which is where you have a whisper fight about arcane personal shit that makes everybody else (in this case the dogs) uncomfortable

Ed Sheeran crying because he doesn't know if dead kids are bad or not

060

Jacob Clifton @jacobclifton.com · 16/09/2026

I swear to God you all have the exact same undercooked, sallow, unhappy, superior look. Go spend this energy on Talarico big boy

030

Jacob Clifton @jacobclifton.com · 15/09/2026

As of this week, unbelievably, this gorgeous maniac has been with us for an entire YEAR!

2220

Jacob Clifton @jacobclifton.com · 12/09/2026

That instantly reminded me of this lol

It's a Joyce Carol Oates tweet from 2014 that reads though Woody Allen has been much denounced very likely many of his denouncers greatly admire nabakov's Lolita. No contradiction?

And then DVSblast responds That's not the same at all. That's terrible you're terrible but thank you for inventing oatmeal

020

Jacob Clifton @jacobclifton.com · 11/09/2026

I realized I haven't seen one person mention him today & I couldn't remember his name so I googled "9/11 sitcom liar" & he came right up

170

Jacob Clifton @jacobclifton.com · 26/08/2026

My personality was & remains: ⅓ Linda Belcher ⅓ Serena van der Wooden ⅓ This guy A heady gumbo

Jacob Clifton @jacobclifton.com · 25/08/2026

POV: I am your brother. We are married

God Emperor illustration of a giant worm with a face and tiny dinosaur arms