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Johnny Xmas

@j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net
1.6K followers 192 following 1.2K posts

We’re sorry, but until civilization decides to begin prosecuting child molesters and cannibals, this account will no longer be capable of being kind to people. Please kindly fuck all the way off.

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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 24/09/2026
What y'all know about a 6500-line changelog code.videolan.org/videolan/vlc...
code.videolan.org
https://code.videolan.org/videolan/vlc/-/raw/3.0.24/NEWS
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BurbSec East @east.burbsec.com · 24/09/2026
TONIGHT at the NEW LOCATION!!!!!! Join us at PILOT PROJECT in Logan Square, across the street from Navigator! www.meetup.com/burbsec/even...
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BSides312 @bsides312.org · 22/09/2026
#BSides312 2027 will be held the Sunday after THOTCON: June 13th! All relevant info will be added to our website as we release it bsides312.org 🔥 READY TO SPEAK OR VOLUNTEER? 🔥 Call for Volunteers and Papers will open in Early November. We'll also announce here when the forms are open.
bsides312.org
BSides312 — Chicago's Security BSides Hacking Conference | June 13, 2027
BSides312 is the Security BSides conference in Chicago — a non-profit, one-day hacker & cybersecurity event at the Irish American Heritage Center, held the day after THOTCON. Talks, workshops,…
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 19/09/2026
The 2026 vintage is lit 
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 16/09/2026
Big ups to ChatGPT, who just dropped the S bomb on me after 3 years of me (somehow) not once cursing at it.
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 14/09/2026
Things you don’t want to find in your data center 
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burbsecpilsen.bsky.social @burbsecpilsen.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
First Burbsec Pilsen is confirmed for September 10, 6pm at Monochrome Brewing: 2101 S Carpenter St, Chicago, IL 60608
static.klipy.com
Ninjala Jane Hacking
ALT: Ninjala Jane Hacking
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burbsecpilsen.bsky.social @burbsecpilsen.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
8 days to go until BurbSec Pilsen at Monochrome Brewing. Come by for some stickers:
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 04/09/2026
Anytime an applicant puts “code review” on their résumé I ask them what their time is in this game semicolon.trm.sh
semicolon.trm.sh
Semicolon Inspector
There is one missing semicolon in the codebase.
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 21/08/2026
Have you ever met an adult named Spencer? 
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 18/08/2026
Phones have had ringtones since their inception...it's time we added hang-up tones www.youtube.com/watch?v=d7T9...
youtube.com
Star fox 64 good luck sound effect
The good luck sound effect from star fox 64 N64nostalgiazone@gmail.com
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 16/08/2026
LLMs do not hallucinate. They’re trained on decades of people with ADHD and this is extremely probabilistic output .
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 14/08/2026
lol
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 13/08/2026
Look it’s understandable that thought `Delta WiFi 🍍` was the SSID for the One Flight Stand dating app
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 10/08/2026
Free Zero Cool
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 08/08/2026
Just a heads up: tomorrow is gonna be canceled. I’m heading home now. 
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 08/08/2026
My #1 @defcon.bsky.social tip was given to me by 47-year Defcon veteran @mog.evil.af, who said 3 squirts of Mio Energy in your room humidifier will allow you to actually bypass the 321 rule and stay awake for the entirety of Defcon
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👻Carl👻Cosmos👻 @cillic.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
Yo, @east.burbsec.com crew hanging out at Burbsec Vegas Meetup.
Us
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 31/07/2026
209 hours remaining for all Fable 5 tasking related to for my conversion of The Odyssey into an autoscrolling Doom mod that requires no user interaction, in a format that will play on my Samsung smart fridge, the way Christopher Nolan intended
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Shecky (((Mike))) - Third Wheel @siliconshecky.siliconshecky.com · 31/07/2026
Always enjoyable going to @east.burbsec.com cause I see people I don't see so frequently. Always sucks leaving cause I feel like I left conversations that I should have had.
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BurbSec East @east.burbsec.com · 30/07/2026
TONIGHT!!!
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 29/07/2026
I heard the door fell off the datacenter and all the servers got sucked out abcnews.com/US/american-...
abcnews.com
American Airlines flights grounded nationwide due to IT outage: FAA
American Airlines flights not in the air were being held for a nationwide ground stop Tuesday evening because of an IT outage, according to an FAA advisory.
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 24/07/2026
I could automate this but who cares
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 24/07/2026
Lots of "Dude, how was that conference you spoke at ON A TRAIN" questions this week, and honestly Adam Schaal has a solid writeup on Hobocon that mimics my experiences here: blog.adamschaal.com/posts/2026-0... Of course, it mimics because we were all stuck inside the same metal tube for 22 hours
blog.adamschaal.com
Hobocon 2 – Electromotive Boogaloo
Notes from Hobocon 2, a security conference held on an Amtrak train from Kansas City to Chicago, including a CTF win, a doubled-up talk, biohacking in motion, and a Lionel box car that someone…
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 23/07/2026
Evangelion is the Arch Linux of anime
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 23/07/2026
OpenAI turning off frontier model guardrails in a desperate bid for attention be like
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 22/07/2026
You know I keep that thang on me 
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 22/07/2026
Me running Windows apps on Linux 
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Kourtney @soitwent.bsky.social · 22/07/2026
The Chicago violence you wont see on TV.
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 22/07/2026
You know I keep that thang on me
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 22/07/2026
OpenAI disabled guardrails on its most advanced models and was surprised when they engineered a sandbox escape and launched cyberattack against Hugging Face to accomplish their tasking. angry_shocked_pikachu.jpg thehill.com/policy/techn...
thehill.com
OpenAI says its technology hacked another company in ‘unprecedented’ event
OpenAI said Tuesday that one of its artificial intelligence systems hacked into another AI company’s servers on its own during internal testing, in what the ChatGPT maker described as an “unprecede…
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 21/07/2026
Same tbh
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 18/07/2026
YOU'RE DOING GREAT
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 17/07/2026
Today’s hotel nightmare
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 17/07/2026
Today’s hotel nightmare
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 16/07/2026
Glad we’re finally modernizing the HTTP response codes
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 16/07/2026
What an AQI of 400 looks like from above. Hope you didn’t throw your respirators out after Covid. 
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 13/07/2026
Someone just shipped something to me wrapped only in a target shopping bag and USPS was all about it
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 13/07/2026
READY FOR DEFCON!! Don’t forget to DM @erratarob.bsky.social for the location of this year’s #BurnerBurnPit!
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 12/07/2026
There is so much of this absolute trash out there, trying to scam everyone who's in the hustle culture and get us to work 80 hours a week doing this garbage work so we can make these AI companies money.
loom.com
For Johnny's Eyes Only - July 10th
Use Loom to record quick videos of your screen and cam. Explain anything clearly and easily – and skip the meeting. An essential tool for hybrid workplaces.
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Frank Cvetkovic (from comics) @gofrankgo.bsky.social · 29/10/2025
Back in my day, AI used to stand for Adobe Illustrator! And we hated that, too!
Grandpa Simpson yelling at a cloud
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 03/07/2026
If you’re scrambling trying to find the Heavener post, don’t forget that archive.org exists web.archive.org/web/20260627...
web.archive.org
heavener: This is what happens when you can't afford EDR licenses
A modular engine that runs real vendor detection logic from reverse-engineered EDR components against live or replayed Windows telemetry.
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 02/07/2026
Another week, another 3-year-old company trying to sell an agentic SOC solution that promises to replace 20 analysts and costs slightly more than 10x what they do. Who is buying this?
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 01/07/2026
I’m gonna be dead one day. That’s crazy. 
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 30/06/2026
My new bike helmet does not seem too enthused about what’s about to happen to it
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 29/06/2026
So here’s what’s banned at the Great American State Fair Raspberry Pis and laptops are banned, but not servers/desktop computers or any of the other dozen nano-computer platforms. Also why is “Router” (woodworking, I assume) the only singular item? Of I bring two, it’s cool?
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BurbSec East @east.burbsec.com · 22/06/2026
NEW LOCATION, FAM!!! The rumors were TRUE! We’ll be beta testing Gracie O’Malley’s in *WICKER PARK* This Thursday! More space! More food! Private bartender! Patio! FREE BEER FROM PUSH SECURITY!!! Come be the weirdos annoying the World Cup fans!!
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 22/06/2026
Infosec will go to 2 entire conferences a month with 6 talks on burnout and mental health but won’t take 2 hours a month to do at-home neurodivergence testing and therapy because they also think watching TikTok can lead to education and self-improvement
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 22/06/2026
Stop saying “ethical hacker.” We have lost many to criminal prosecution and related imprisonment or suicide after they’ve done something ethical. Your use of the term to mean “non-criminals” is a deep insult to their loss, and ours. Don’t let marketing define your vocabulary, or rewrite history.
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Johnny Xmas @j0hnnyxm4s.johnnyxmas.net · 19/06/2026
Black Hat switching their site to a light theme is like the end of Secret Hitler where you find out who was Hitler and it’s definitely who you thought blackhat.com/upcoming.html
blackhat.com
Black Hat
Black Hat
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