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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified)

@ipsumlorem.bsky.social
1.1K followers 766 following 17K posts

My posts are enjoyed* by literally dozens of people worldwide. *delete as applicable. 🦀 Verified 2025.04.23 "Kind of Slime"-(Graham Linehan,17.08.23) "waste of a good user name"-some random

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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 22/07/2026
Just had this served up on FB. Are Reform UK ok? They appear to have forgotten that only one party in the Uk has been successfully convicted of their leaders taking bribes from Moscow, and that's themselves. Not labour. Utterly bizarre and pathetic.
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 16/07/2026
Reminds of someone. A certain writer for a certain fandom who I find disagreeable. NO NOT YOU RANDOM INTERNET USER
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
Hydration Break
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
"What's the crime? Ordering a Milkshake? A Succulent, MacDonalds Milkshake?"
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
"What's the crime? Ordering a Milkshake? A Succulent, MacDonalds Milkshake?"
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
Meanwhile, in Clacton.....
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
In this weather, ice cream for breakfast was an excellent choice. Don't @ me, you know I'm right. ice cream for breakfast, eating crisps in bed.... if i knew being an adult was this much fun, i would have become sooner. (not) *my ass is not ginormous, fyi. But hellokitty memes for the win.
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
COUNT BINFACE SPEAKS TO YOU (from The Times)
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
Ah, Birmingham. Look What you could have won. Then Herman Goering came along and redeveloped the entire city to his own design, and didn't even ask for planning permission. How rude. (1930s architectural model of the redevelopment of Broad street, roughly where the library and ICC is now)
Architectural model of Birmingham as envisioned in a 1930's redesign for the Broad street area.
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
strongly suspect its an alt of this account, as this basking account has appeared out of nowhere and is defending any criticism of below account. again, more targeted hate and harrassment below
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
c/w harrassment and threats Me: maybe transphobes issuing death threats against people isn't very nice. TRansphobe: how dare you say trans people are harassed or threatened. I will therefore prove you wrong by issuing threats against you! (as screencapped below) *sighs in tedious predictability*
he username at the top is reversed (mirrored horizontally) and partially obscured, reading @baskingbandril.bsky.social.The post text reads:"You're fucking joking right?You claim everyone is full of hate and anger and yet your precious Heather cheered on the death of an elderly woman who was murdered in her own home!

You fucking morons are the worst culprits and you all claim to be victims when your behaviour is called up on!"
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
Absolutely loving the current Jesus Jones media campaign in advance of their new release. Its so aggressively , unapologetically retro.
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 14/07/2026
God,l I wish i was just well enough to live a normal-ish life. I doubt that'll ever be the case again, unfortunately.
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 14/07/2026
Look, I don't know when this happened, but I'm looking for my library card RIGHT NOW...
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 13/07/2026
Can anyone suggest where I start with the Neu! Discography ? Neu! Neu! 2 Neu! 75 Neu! 86 Neu! 3.1 Neu! 3.11 for Workgroups Neu! 95 Neu! 98 Neu! 2000 Neu! XP Neu! Vista Neu! 10 Which album is best?
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 13/07/2026
Oh noes. jennifer kicks all sorts of ass, and i hope she kicks cancers' ass too.
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 13/07/2026
NICHE. I was probably at work that day and couldn't do so. it's the old joke.
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 13/07/2026
The Count Binface Appreciation Society on Facebook? I wonder why there's a whole load of Russian Bots glasstroturfing the page, trying to ensure Nasty Nigel gets re-elected wonder why Moscow want Nasty nigel back in Parliament eh? its not like REFORM leaders have form for taking bribes from them
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 13/07/2026
Talking of bass, here I am rehearsing in the photo below - from 2001 i think? (on the left) Rock 'Ard. Rock 'Eavy. Rock Often! \m/
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 13/07/2026
me at the last live gig i played, 28 jan 2012. I was still in my thirties at this point! only just mind you....
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 13/07/2026
Monday.
op-Left Panel:National Park Service tweet reading "Believe in yourself like visitors who believe they can pet a bison.

"Top-Right Panel: National Park Service tweet reading , "Bison may look friend-shaped, but they already have all the friends they want. Keep your distance and don't make it awkward."


Bottom-Left Panel: National Park Service tweet reading "Living your life to the fullest does not have to involve selfies with bison.

"Bottom-Right Panel: A split-image meme with the top text reading, "JUST TO BE CLEAR". 
The left side shows a domestic brown cow labeled "COW", and the right side it has a picture of a bosn saying "high capacity assault cow"
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 13/07/2026
Anyway , I bought an Iron Maiden single in August 1988 and now .... here we are? 14 wikipedia citations, 6 bass guitars, 25db of hearing loss, hundreds of gigs, and an awful lot of time spent in record shops later... yeah, most expensive £2.99 of my life.
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 13/07/2026
Shouts "MEDIC!" (Johnny Rico Not pictured)
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
Happy anniverary to the time the Guardian announced the birth of the latest spawn of Boris Johnson. There's some very interesting commentary in the third paragraph, you might notice, especially for you fans of Christopher Nolan films....
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
Been doing a lot of work recently, and writing. Mostly on grief. And how it affects the psyche. And its helping. There's healing, and helping. no malice, only moving forward with my life. Anyway here is a picture of me... not sure what drew me to the caption ;-)
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
This is 100% accurate, and I agree with this. No-one is property, not children nor adults. we belong to ourselves. We are all humans with their own free will and choice. And that is core to understanding pretty much everything about being a decent human. Your opinion may vary, of course.
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
Sunday.
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
From Post Secret. I've got - what, 14 citations on wikipedia? The most recent of which comes from about 2002, so I guess yeah, i *USED* to be somebody. Past tense. Now I'm just graham off the internet....
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
Hydration Break
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
*Hydration Break*
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 11/07/2026
HYDRATION BREAK “It’s more beautiful than I’d ever imagined…This certainly is worthy of the King of Kings."
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 11/07/2026
I don't even know if this GOT a UK cinema release - I can't find any record of one anywhere. So How did I see it? Courtesy of a timecoded VHS in 2000 I bought on a market stall for £1, before it even hit rental. Even the DVD is 4:3.... Does that count? (NB: Previous image had content warning)
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 11/07/2026
I don't even know if this GOT a UK cinema release - I can't find any record of one anywhere. So How did I see it? Courtesy of a timecoded VHS in 2000 I bought on a market stall for £1, before it even hit rental. Even the DVD is 4:3.... Does that count? (NB: Previous image had content warning)
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
I AM IN THIS PICTURE AND I DON'T LIKE IT
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
new "Is Baby Gronk the new Drip King, or is he just getting rizzed up by Livvy?" dropped.
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
Lets not rush them. they need time to install the Ouija board first.
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
hydration break
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
Personally, I think victory for the COUNT in the Parliamentary constituency for Christopher Harborn of Thailand (Clacton)? VICTORY IS BINEVITABLE!
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 09/07/2026
Me reposting myself
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 09/07/2026
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 09/07/2026
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 09/07/2026
The latest reincarnation of the BNP / NF are back, standing in Clacton & I for one, can't take this seriously. Look at their Oswald Mosley cosplay BS. Shouldn't they be somewhere else? The Battle of Cable Street called, they want their losing side back so they can have their ass whupped a 2nd time
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 08/07/2026
Me, Watching this thread ;
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"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified) @ipsumlorem.bsky.social · 08/07/2026
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