Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 04/10/2026[He does not mean it like that! Get your mind out of the gutter] Well, as much as I can as a spectator. I don't think I'd be a good player. I'd end up with, at minimum, a yellow by halftime. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 04/10/2026For now. I'm coming at you hard next time. [He's posing this as a playful competition of course. He lays his chin on Antonio's shoulder] 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 04/10/2026Well, football commentary. It's different than playing. I'm not sure who's the best at that. The Spanish speaking American commentators were very lively at the very least. I didn't get to hear very many perspectives besides them, American English, UK, yours, and mine. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 04/10/2026...that actually sounds like a lot of fun. It's like football. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 04/10/2026(( Everyone give it up for Holly for making the INCREDIBLE list 010
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 03/10/2026What's a commentary cuck office? [He has a very different perception of Erze than how she actually is] 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 03/10/2026What the hell was Roderich doing shoving money up there? Was it something Gilbert told him to do? 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 03/10/2026INSIDE?! [He definitely was thinking this was a traditional orifice, not a ln improvised catheter. He shudders] 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 03/10/2026That's awful. I hope whoever did that is burning in hell or worse. 001
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 03/10/2026[Surely an ice cream will help his headache] 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 03/10/2026It feels disrespectful to put it on top of you. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 02/10/2026...do they think it's performance art or something? Surely they recognize it's you. 010
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 02/10/2026I think it's worth it if we can get the help for free. [He sniffles. It's part of the echoing, empty feeling of grief that's resonating within him as he controls the initial wave] 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 01/10/2026I do. I think a parmesan would go well with this right now. I can try making the meatballs with some kind of smoked cheese next time though. That might be good. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 01/10/2026This would be so good with the right cheese. [Well NOW he's thinking about what kind of cheese would go best with this meal] 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 01/10/2026[He doesn't get the connection beyond just saying the word meat. But he is feeling a bit better, given a little time and redirecting his focus onto making sure Antonio is fed] Slightly. I'll be fine. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 30/09/2026[That can be arranged. He helps him flip so he can face the table. Their plates can be side by side] If you want more meat you can have some of mine. [With being upset, his appetite has been disrupted. He can easily reheat the potatoes but the meatballs are much better fresh. 100
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 30/09/2026[He blinks, lifting his head] ... Do you want to turn around? [He doesn't want Antonio to leave him yet. He likes the weight of him and the feeling of someone right here for him. This is the best compromise he can think of] 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 30/09/2026[He doesn't notice what Antonio's doing at all. He's far away, in his thoughts. He pulls Antonio even tighter to his chest, as if his boyfriend was a security object. He feels so small for once. If only he actually was that size, then he could tuck himself into Antonio's arms properly] 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 30/09/2026[He's not supposed to. He's the big brother. He's the one that's meant to be depended on, the pillar. He can't fall apart like this. He's squeezing his eyes tightly to try to will the feelings away. It is a good opportunity for Antonio to get the plate closer] 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 30/09/2026No, I meant...I meant that just bringing them up... [He's very much appreciating the hug. He's trying his best to keep it together but his resolve is crumbling a little at a time. He's desperately trying not to outright sob in front of Antonio. He wants to be the big, stony, brave man he should be] 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 30/09/2026No. I brought it up. You don't need to apologize. I should be able to talk about them without crying like a kid. [Despite his words, he's appreciating the hug. He lightly tugs on Antonio's sleeve as a small signal that he wants him to sit on his lap so they can hug properly. He can't bear to ask] 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 30/09/2026[He feels like he wants to cry, but he doesn't want to do that in front of Antonio. This dinner was supposed to be relaxing or nice. He's already ruined that] I...I don't know. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 30/09/2026They did love me. A lot. But your dad is different from my parents. Of course he'd be proud of you for building an empire, that's exactly what he did. My parents didn't do that. So I'm just not sure... [He can't just shrug them off easily like Antonio can. He was very attached to them] 100
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 30/09/2026I'm thinking about my parents. If they'd be proud of me...or if they'd be ok with who I am and what I've done. [He goes quiet, picking at his food] ... I don't think I've turned out the way they expected me to. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 30/09/2026[Well that broke him out of it] Huh? What was that about money? I'm sorry, I was distracted. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 29/09/2026[He nods. He's not religious enough anymore to say grace. He just isn't rude enough to start eating while Antonio can't. Plus he's in his head now about what his parents would think of him now. He keeps it up as he chews, going deeper into his thoughts. At least the food is good] 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 29/09/2026I feel like they might be surprised. I...I don't know if they knew all of that when they passed. Certainly not the rich part. We struggled a lot. [He's sitting down across from Antonio but he doesn't start eating immediately. He needs to think for a moment first] 001
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 29/09/2026[He supposes he could've offered a tomato or some toast to tide Antonio over. Oops] I hope you enjoy it. It's something my dad taught me to make when I was little. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 29/09/2026I know some people like it separate. [He's also a wet potato lover. He's getting their plates ready, bringing it to the table, and pulling out the chair for Antonio like a gentleman] 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 29/09/2026Of course I care. I love you. I don't ever want to think you're being harmed. [Instead of answering if he'll make dinner, he's assuming that him moving towards the kitchen is enough. He's not as confident in Spanish food yet so he's getting something more familiar ready: meatballs. 100
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 29/09/2026I don't like it. I don't want anyone attacking you if I can help it. But we can come back to this after we eat. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 28/09/2026I need to speak with this therapist. I refuse to let someone hurt you. What the fuck. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 28/09/2026I don't think that's the goal of therapy. And I'm not going to start anything with Tino or Berwald. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 27/09/2026I don't French kiss Antonio while we're in the restroom. 010
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 27/09/2026We haven't even done the counseling yet and we're already working together better. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 26/09/2026I don't know. I figure all kids are pretty much the same until around 14. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 26/09/2026Why would it be a challenge? They're like 12 aren't they? I ran my own farm and was selling to market stalls at that age. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 25/09/2026We can ask. Maybe they'll be more agreeable if we offer to babysit at some point soon as payment for the meeting. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 25/09/2026... With Christmas. Tino is getting ready for Christmas and is busy. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 25/09/2026Why would that matter? I thought things were fine with us in that regard. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 25/09/2026That might be more constructive. Though aren't they starting to get busy right around now? 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 25/09/2026I'm not sure. I pay for supplemental insurance anyways due to my non-human status, so it might be covered with that. Otherwise we could try asking the church since that's free. Though they might not accept us. ... Maybe we can talk to Jozef and do the opposite of what he did. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 25/09/2026That certainly could be a very good option. I like the statue system we came up with but it's not helpful when we're outside. We can start looking for one. I'll see if my health plan covers it. 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 24/09/2026I would consider it depending on how experienced they were and how expensive it would be. But do they do that for people who aren't married? [Paying to fix a relationship instead of just cutting ties shows how much Abel also wants this to work. He usually sees therapy as just expensive guidance] 000
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 24/09/2026I don't know really. I think it's that I'm worried we aren't going to work out and you'll replace me. We're very different people. You get along with everyone else, except for Arthur, much better than you seem to get along with me. We argue more than they do with you. 100
Abel Janssen @hollandeeznuts.bsky.social · 24/09/2026I'm not mad, but I am still a little...I don't know how to describe it. The feeling is like being offended and upset but there's more to it that I can't really put to words. But I'm not mad at you. 000
