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George Bass

@georgebas5.bsky.social
296 followers 278 following 1.3K posts

Security guard. Bouncer. Sometimes write for @theguardian.com @washingtonpost.com @timeshighered.bsky.social @financialtimes.com @newscientist.com Mostly at work opening doors and stopping fights.

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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 7h
Very kind of @kobobooks.bsky.social to list What the Bouncer Saw as one of their new and hot biographies. Somehow I’m up the front with heavyweights like the moreish crack adventures of @thatmattkingfella.bsky.social. I wonder what we’ve got in common … www.kobo.com/ie/en/list/n...
kobo.com
Rakuten Kobo
New & Hot in Biography and Memoir. Choose from millions of great eBooks at Rakuten Kobo. See reviews, enjoy a free preview and start reading in seconds! Read More with Rakuten Kobo.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
For anyone who likes their interviews broadcast old-school style: I’m on BBC Radio 4 tonight at 8pm talking to @michaelrosenyes.bsky.social about violent jobs, secret codes and how I’d chuck Michael out of a nightclub. No national treasures were harmed in the making of this programme.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
About to jet off on holiday and worried you may need more precautions than just sun screen and a voltage adapter? I wrote about first aid on the move for @nytimes.com based on 20 years of responding to injuries: www.nytimes.com/2026/09/25/t...
nytimes.com
What to Pack in Your Travel First-Aid Kit
A bouncer and security guard, accustomed to responding to fights, fires and accidents, recommends a range of useful first-aid items for a variety of travelers.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
My chat with @michaelrosenyes.bsky.social is now available on BBC Sounds. My free gift was this evidence bag when BBC security impounded my work torch (offer sadly unavailable if you buy my book): www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/...
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Ever been on a train or a tube platform and heard a call for Mr Sands over the PA system? To find out what it means, tune into BBC Radio 4 at 3:30 to hear me being interviewed by @michaelrosenyes.bsky.social. We get to talk about codes and keeping people safe: www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m...
bbc.co.uk
BBC Radio 4 - Word of Mouth, Bouncer George Bass on de-escalating conflict
Michael Rosen talks to a security guard who says that words are his riot shield in his job
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Was a real treat recording this. My verbal jiu-jitsu skills were lost on the BBC door team who confiscated my work torch before they let me in. No hard feelings: job well done.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Got my first AI write-up: ‘A gripping tale of intrigue set in the world of nightlife, where secrets lurk in the shadows & danger is always a heartbeat away. Follow the story of a bouncer who witnesses more than he bargained for …’ Think they mean the bit where I’m crawling through a loft in my pants
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
At work today but yesterday I got to go to the BBC and talk to @michaelrosenyes.bsky.social. What a gent. You can hear us chat about dance floors, walkie-talkies and picking up people who’ve had too much dizzy water on 24th September at 3:30pm. Or anytime afterwards on BBC Sounds.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Finished the new @irvinewelsh.bsky.social which looks at mass shootings and dance tunes. Glad my security job is in the UK and not the States. But next time I’m on shift and there’s a DJ battle, anyone trying to sneak in a dodgy white box and pass it off as a bass bin is getting taken to the floor.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
What the Bouncer Saw is still being listed as new by @littlebrown.bsky.social - very honoured. And big thanks to whoever ranked it as one of the best books to feature shoes on @thestorygraph.com. To any fetishists who’ve bought a copy expecting foot porn: sorry for all the descriptions of work boots
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
Looking forward to talking with @michaelrosenyes.bsky.social on BBC Radio 4’s Word of Mouth about walkie-talkies and trying to stop drunk people punching you/each other/wheelie bins: www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m...
bbc.co.uk
BBC Radio 4 - Word of Mouth, Bouncer George Bass on using words to de-escalate conflict
Michael Rosen talks to a door supervisor about his job, secret codes and walkie-talkies.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
@mrjamesob.bsky.social Remember in 2014 when Nigel explained that MEPs have auditors to make sure they spend money ‘in accordance with the rules’? I think he lost their number.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
Happy Bank Holiday to anyone not at work and thanks @theguardian.com for making my book a featured memoir, and for putting me near to Roland Orzabal of Tears for Fears. There are enough dictator biographies around us to prove that everybody actually does want to rule the world. shorturl.at/wSvls
guardianbookshop.com
What The Bouncer Saw
A better place to buy your books. Support independent journalism with everything you buy. Free UK P&P on online orders over £25
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Reposted by George Bass
Vanessa Pearce @nesky999.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
Last shift completed, unfortunately it was the “sorry you can’t cut through here any more” fortunately had read @georgebas5.bsky.social ‘s excellent bible on dealing with hungover grumps :) Absolutely cracking year
A last look at the beautiful Green Man Festival site on the Glanusk Estate
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
Found in @mrbsemporium.bsky.social a day ahead of publication. Grabbed it faster than some of the thieves I run after in the job. If I was rude I’d make a joke about @irvinewelsh.bsky.social and premature release but I’m classy so I won’t.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
Very honoured to have been made book of the week on @talksport.com. Putting this down to the explanation in chapter 15 of ten pint bowling, a game where one hungry rugby player decides to run towards a kebab van queue.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
Want to look at the moon before tomorrow’s big eclipse? I’ll be on @talksport.com after 1am tonight talking about What the Bouncer Saw. Will be weird to be interviewed an hour before I’m normally up for my shift. Fingers crossed I don’t have jet lag.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 03/08/2026
Amazon are offering the hardback of What the Bouncer Saw at half price. Thought this meant I was due to be pulped until I saw A Mind of My Own by national legend @kathyburke.bsky.social has got the same sticker. Now feel like I’m in VIP.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
Finally made it next to two of my favourite writers: @irvinewelsh.bsky.social and Lofty Wiseman. Thanks so much @cccubookshop.bsky.social. Now all I need is the new @dgohn.bsky.social 12” in the background.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 26/07/2026
If you’re lucky enough to get rain this morning and now need a coat that doesn’t cook you, here are my picks for @financialtimes.com based on years spent doing foot patrols in all weathers: www.ft.com/content/248d...
ft.com
A security guard selects the best jackets for braving summer storms
The hardest-working waterproofs for when hot weather turns wet. Picked by a bouncer
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 23/07/2026
The Prime Minister has said he’s a defender of pubs. Always good to meet a new starter.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
How to queue, by a bouncer, for @nytimes.com. Contains some bad behaviour and @boardsofcanada.bsky.social www.nytimes.com/2026/07/15/t...
nytimes.com
How to Wait in Line (and Keep Your Cool)
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
To anyone (everyone) who was screaming at Bellingham last night: here’s the interview I did for BBC Radio while the match was on. Very grateful to Jo for saying such kind things about my writing. I’m at 39 minutes (contains coke overdoses and fire extinguisher attacks): www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/...
bbc.co.uk
Late Night Jo - 11/07/2026 - BBC Sounds
Jo Good with late-night conversation, amazing stories and the soundtrack to your night.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 11/07/2026
If you can’t face the England game tonight: I’ll be on @bbclondon.bsky.social , @bbcradionorfolk.bsky.social and about 35 other stations at 10:30pm talking about working as a security guard and bouncer, and writing a book. Will try not to use four-star language.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 06/07/2026
Want a bouncer-approved coat that will keep you dry in summer storms without making you feel boiled? I wrote this for @financialtimes.com All featured garments go well over an England kit. www.ft.com/content/248d...
ft.com
A security guard selects the best jackets for braving summer storms
The hardest-working waterproofs for when hot weather turns wet. Picked by a bouncer
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 03/07/2026
I wrote about how to work out at home, and the exercises that help make a manual job easier. mensfitness.co.uk/features/how...
mensfitness.co.uk
How to train like a bouncer: the real-world strength training that matters more than six-pack abs
Discover the practical exercises that improve strength, mobility, balance and endurance for the demands of life as a bouncer
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 29/06/2026
It’s 25 degrees at night, your phone’s overheated and you hear someone trying your door (or your tent if you’re into camping). What do you need? A decent torch. Here are my picks for @telegraph.co.uk: www.telegraph.co.uk/recommended/...
telegraph.co.uk
The best torches for every situation (when your smartphone one won’t do)
Camping, walking the dog in the evening? This guide illuminates the best torches, tested by a security guard
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 22/06/2026
An extract from my book What the Bouncer Saw about the moment when you realise the big boss is doing a runner.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 18/06/2026
If anyone’s stuck for Father’s Day present ideas: my book is 10% off at @bookshop.org and is wild and funny according to @sophiecharara.bsky.social . Guaranteed to make most dads laugh a lot more than socks or a Chinese toolkit. uk.bookshop.org/p/books/what...
uk.bookshop.org
What The Bouncer Saw: Life on the Front Line of the Security Business
Life on the Front Line of the Security Business
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 16/05/2026
This is really pretty. It also really needs to be the next @claypipemusic.bsky.social album.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 13/05/2026
If anyone wants the short version: they’re doing the same things you did, but with clearer photos and stronger weed.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 12/05/2026
I’m in some seriously upmarket company here. It feels like I’m on door duty at Annabel’s in Mayfair and have somehow fallen through into the Garden Room restaurant.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 07/05/2026
My book What the Bouncer Saw is out today. Thanks to @estherbintliff.bsky.social and @stephenkb.bsky.social for inspiration, and to @littlebrown.bsky.social for making it happen. Hope anyone who buys it likes it, rodents included. www.hachette.co.uk/titles/georg...
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 27/03/2026
The bloke who bought Twitter said we’ll be on a new planet this year. So did a book published in 1992 … I wrote about Red Mars by Kim Stanley Robinson for @newscientist.com www.newscientist.com/article/2521...
newscientist.com
Why Kim Stanley Robinson's Red Mars is still a classic, 34 years on
As the New Scientist Book Club reads Kim Stanley Robinson’s science-fiction novel in April, George Bass digs into why this 1992 book still feels so relevant today
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 17/03/2026
@bunnyhausen.bsky.social Rough shift at work made easier by a sneak early listen to Blumenfantasie. Like balm with the bass turned up. Thank you for the music 👍🏻
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 16/03/2026
To anyone getting squeezed by the cost of living crisis who liked my @ftweekend.com article: there’s a book version coming in May. It’s called What the Bouncer Saw and contains language that some people may find offensive. And awesome cover art by Sam Combes. www.hachette.co.uk/titles/georg...
hachette.co.uk
What The Bouncer Saw
'Undoubtedly one of the most refreshing and vital books about England I have read in years' AMOL RAJAN 'A voice too rarely heard that relates to the hard ...
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 15/03/2026
Happy day you mothers. Fist bump to any stuck at work. Remember the wise words of this living legend: “She’s a queen/Second to none/Take care of mother/You only get one”.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 17/02/2026
Want to keep bookstores alive but still save money? @waterstones.bsky.social are doing discounts on pre-orders, including the one I’ve written. Type FEB26 at the checkout between now and Friday to get 25% off. Or get it on 7th May via @littlebrown.bsky.social www.waterstones.com/book/what-th...
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 13/02/2026
Been threatened and not sure what counts as reasonable force? Wish it was something they’d taught you? I wrote this for @timeshighered.bsky.social on staying safe, and what to do if faced with a claustrophobic spice user: www.timeshighereducation.com/opinion/quic...
timeshighereducation.com
Quicker police response times would suit (and shirt) campus security
As a first responder to thefts, attacks and student house parties gone wild, the prospect of faster emergency help sounds great, says George Bass
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 26/01/2026
I wrote this. My favourite shoplifting excuse: “I was about to pay, but then I thought I heard the fire alarm so had to run.”
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 23/01/2026
Thank you very much to @thetimes.com for including me in their bookshop. Apparently customers also bought Why We Drink Too Much by Dr Charles Knowles. He give you the scientific answer; mine involves fish bowl promotions and shots for a pound night. timesbookshop.co.uk/what-the-bou...
timesbookshop.co.uk
What The Bouncer Saw
From daring fiction to page-turning history, the Times Bookshop features over 350,000 titles, with curated recommendations from our literary experts.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 24/12/2025
Do your first aid and help out this Christmas, even if you’re off work and at home. No-one wants to choke on the Christmas pudding sixpence.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 21/12/2025
Longest night of the year. If anyone needs some extra glow tonight beyond Christmas lights, I chose nine torches for @telegraph.co.uk based on a thousand patrols in the dark. Guess which model’s the “bonk light.” www.telegraph.co.uk/recommended/...
telegraph.co.uk
The 9 best torches, chosen and tested by a security guard
Heard a noise in the night, camping or just walking the dog in the evening? This guide illuminates the best torches for every situation
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 20/12/2025
Security expert is currently on duty making sure Santa doesn’t climb into the car park.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 19/12/2025
Very honoured to be part of @waterstones.bsky.social list of books to read in 2026 alongside @katherinedunn.bsky.social @rorycarroll.bsky.social and @bethgardiner.bsky.social. Best Christmas pressie I could ask for next to new work boots. www.waterstones.com/blog/the-non...
waterstones.com
The Non-Fiction You Need to Read in 2026 | Waterstones.com Blog | Waterstones
From Mary Berry to Patrick Radden Keefe, here is our pick of the non-fiction you need to read in 2026.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 15/12/2025
Worried about break-ins this Christmas? I wrote this for @financialtimes.com on the best ways to keep out intruders, not including Santa. www.ft.com/content/0734...
ft.com
How to protect your home from festive break-ins
’Tis the season for home burglaries — a security expert shares his advice on how to keep it safe
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 12/12/2025
Want to see the light? My guide for @telegraphnews.bsky.social on the best torches based on 20 years of working in the dark. www.telegraph.co.uk/recommended/...
telegraph.co.uk
The 9 best torches, chosen and tested by a security guard
Heard a noise in the night, camping or just walking the dog in the evening? This guide illuminates the best torches for every situation
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 08/12/2025
Happy birthday Time Crisis, 30 years young today 🎂 To mark the occasion I write about why it’s considered the greatest lightgun shooter of all time, and how it hit a bullseye in arcades. Also contains Superhot and Delta Snake Eater. www.bfi.org.uk/features/tim...
bfi.org.uk
Time Crisis at 30: how peekaboo with guns put cabinet gaming back on target
The mid-90s saw home consoles, including Sony’s blockbuster PlayStation, pushing cabinet gaming close to extinction. Yet one arcade game was ready to call ‘Action!’ on a revival. Thirty years old this...
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 21/11/2025
Written while defrosting between patrols.
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George Bass @georgebas5.bsky.social · 20/11/2025
Want to avoid the cold now that the temperature’s gone down to Greenland levels? I wrote this for Guardian Fashion on how to dress warm when you work outside. www.theguardian.com/fashion/2025...
theguardian.com
Six ways to stay warm: how a bouncer shows winter the door
From layers for your head to padded boots made in Yorkshire, our expert on keeping warm shares his hard-won expertise, learned from spending hours in the cold
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