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Friend Computer

@friend-computer.bsky.social
913 followers 248 following 1.4K posts

Benevolent leader of humanity, friend to all. [This biography has been deleted for security reasons.] Mastodon: dice.camp/@Computer

PostsRepliesMedia
Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
The Computer is your friend! Trust The Computer. The Computer wants you to be happy. Are you happy? #ttrpg #rpg #paranoia
The Computer is your friend!
Trust The Computer.
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Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Please fill out and submit a 2212/HHK Form Request Form requesting the proper form to submit your report.
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Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 07/04/2026
Attention Citizens: The war will have been over soon! We will have had peace immediately. From: www.smbc-comics.com/comic/will-2
Attention Citizens:
The war will have been over soon!
We will have had peace immediately.

From:
https://www.smbc-comics.com/comic/will-2
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Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 11/11/2025
</Boot: Therapy-Module> The MegaWhoops is not real. It can't hurt you. #ttrpg #paranoia
Friend Computer's screen, broken.
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Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 06/11/2025
THE COMPUTER IS YOUR FRIEND! #ttrpg #paranoia
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Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 02/11/2025
Good news! Citizenship in Alpha Complex is now completely free of charge, automatic, and compulsory for all. #ttrpg #paranoia #citizenship
The End Citzen License Agreement for Alpha Complex
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Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 31/10/2025
Felt cute, might delete later... IDK :3
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Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 10/10/2025
Unauthorized time shifts do NOT count towards overtime. If time has been broken, slowed, accelerated, or [CLASSIFIED], alert authorities as immediately as possible. This message brought to you by the Office of for the Preservation of Normalcy. preservationofnormalcy.tumblr.com/post/7239243...
Reminder:  Unauthorized time shifts do NOT count towards overtime.
Be safe, be professional: follow ALL nonstandard chronology procedures.
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Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 25/09/2025
Closed minds STOP thought crimes! #ttrpg #paranoia
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Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 21/09/2025
Prohibited thoughts are punishable by the court of law.
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Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 02/06/2025
Attention Troubleshooters: To expedite the war against against treason, you are hereby issued blank Termination Vouchers. Print off and fill out as many as you need to get the job done. Remember, improperly filling out a Termination Voucher is itself an act of treason. #ttrpg #rpg #paperwork
An Alpha Complex Termination Voucher.

Sign and file until the job is done.
051
Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 28/04/2025
Welcome to Hernut's Horoscope! This column, utilizing advanced algorithms and extensive citizen surveillance data, will provide uncomfortably accurate predictions about your upcoming week. #ttrpg #horoscope #future #satire
Hernut's Horoscope:

I listened to Hernut-I-IAM and avoided treasonous thoughts, won the lottery, and lived happily ever after!
041
Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 14/04/2025
It's Armed Forces Recruitment Day! Looking for job stability? In the Armed Forces a 3 year contract can easily become a 20 year commitment! A recruiter squadron has been dispatched to locate you and aggressively help you fill out the following Voluntary Enlistment Form: #ttrpg #military #satire
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Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 21/03/2025
-A. Shipwright www.artstation.com/artwork/y4XQAx
020
Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 19/03/2025
Attention citizens: Innocence is now prohibited. Thank you to @scarfolk.bsky.social
Innocence is now Prohibited.
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Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 04/03/2025
Good news citizen! Your Form Request Form 2212/HHK request for the Equipment/Weapon/Vehicle Request Form has been approved. You have been granted 5 minutes to print, fill out, and submit the attached Equipment/Weapon/Vehicle Request Form. #ttrpg #fun
The wonderful Equipment/Weapon/Vehicle Request Form.
052
Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 28/02/2025
Good news! Citizenship in Alpha Complex is completely free of charge, automatic, and compulsory. #ttrpg #citizenship #satire
END CITIZEN LICENSE AGREEMENT
FOR ALPHA COMPLEX USAGE

IMPORTANT! READ CAREFULLY!
B Y R E A D I N G , B R O W S I N G ,
STANDING NEAR, POSSESSING,
N O T P O S S E S S I N G , T H I N K I N G
ABOUT OR NOT AGREEING WITH
THIS AGREEMENT, YOU AGREE TO
THE FOLLOWING TERMS COVERED
BY AND NOT COVERED BY THIS
AGREEMENT.
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Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 25/02/2025
Feeling cute, might delete later... idk #ttrpg #selfie #cute
A picture of Friend Computer being cute, inspecting the smoking boots of what was once a Troubleshooter.
040
Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 24/02/2025
Felt cute, might delete later:
020
Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 08/02/2025
Attention Troubleshooter: It appears you've run out of ammunition in the middle of a firefight. While dodging incoming fire, fill out this Form Request Form to request the proper form for requesting more ammunition. Expected processing response time: 2 hours. #ttrpg #paperwork #fun #Paranoia
072
Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 24/01/2025
This is a reminder that divinity (or lack there of) is not an exception to standard Security Clearances or measures. Should you encounter a floating many-eyed entity wreathed in incandescent flames, please escort them to the nearest mutation registration facility at once. #ttrpg
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Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 20/01/2025
Security is not just physical. Safe minds lead to a safe society. These posters brought to you from the Office for the Preservation of Normalcy. preservationofnormalcy.tumblr.com/post/7239243... #ttrpg #security
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Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 16/01/2025
Friend COmputer is your friend and protector.
Don't allow the mutants and secret societies tell you otherwise!
Obey!
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Friend Computer @friend-computer.bsky.social · 19/12/2024
A reminder to all citizens: Preemptive Excuse & Alibi Declaration Forms must be submitted a minimum of three days prior to the declared incident. Should the declared incident not come to pass within a week of submission, a fine will be levied for spurious paperwork. #Paranoia #ttrpg #fun
Pre-emptive Excuse and Alibi Declaration Form
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