iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 04/10/2026

This is what we've come to. Texas is being Texas.

Racist text message from Paxton supporters.

FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 01/10/2026

Holy crap, @wilwheaton.net did a shoutout to @punkwithacamera.bsky.social and that is soooo cool. They not only do kick ass shirts but they do some of the most awesome shooting targets out there.

Shooting targets with numbered rings with an X in the middle with superimposed over clansmen, a nazi, and a temu nazi. they also do IDF targets and a whole host of other targets including flock cameras.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 23/09/2026

Super niche content: Every nonprofit development office during gala season.

Ann office with boxes and boxes of booze and luxury goods. Boxes of Tito's Handmade Vodka, Louis Vitton bags, etc fill the small office up.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 21/09/2026

That's racist against Vogons.

A Vogon construction ship commander reading his poetry.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 18/09/2026

So here's a map of Mars. I don't think Elon Musk has actually ever seen one since there's a lot of red and black areas but barely any white ones.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 18/09/2026

My face when my youngest keeps going on and on about the different versions of The Dominator weather chaser vehicle without stopping to even breathe.

a photo of someone explaining something to pope leo while the pope makes a face of slight discomfort

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 14/09/2026

I just discovered that there are canned grits. <revulsion.gif>

Photo of 4 cans of grits. The first is homestyle origingal, the next is grits with butter, grits with cheddar cheese, and jalapeno cheese grits. We've strayed so far from god's light haven't we.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 13/09/2026

So, one very Texas thing is homecoming mums. They started out as corsages and then they went full Texan and became ways of showing off to your neighbors and friends. Way more of a thing in rural parts of the state but they are also big in towns.

Two WAPSy blonde girls in cheer uniforms with average sized homecoming mums that weigh around 20-30 lbs.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 11/09/2026

I spent a fortune buying a Neopoint 1600 because it was literally one of the only phones that could display a "mobile website" text file. No graphics yet, still just text to select. I was the only person in my office whose phone could text message. Their other cells couldn't.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 09/09/2026

Just remembered a real blast from the past, Informix Wingz. God, that was such a badass spreadsheet software. Way ahead of its time.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 09/09/2026

This is a little hurtful, but it's pretty accurate. I do love San Antonio more than anywhere of the dozen plus places I've lived. Honestly, it's the people here. They're the Yin to NY & Los Angeles' Yang. People here are very real and brutally so, plus it's too hot to be in a hurry.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 04/09/2026

Oh shit, they also have the 'Ritos and a Viper and will sell soon the B Wing...you owe me $100.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 02/09/2026

Without saying your age, what is your favourite movie that came out when you were 20? Like the end of World War 2...

Five men sitting on a couch watching the TV. The movie is Longtime Companion.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 01/09/2026

Exec at work reminded me of why my new mug works. "I love that we can give you shit that we thought was impossible to sort out and you have it done before we're even finished talking about it."

Tired middle aged man with a gorgeous aloha shirt and a white beard holding a mug that says "I accidentally became important at work and it's ruining my life"

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 30/08/2026

They were on sale so I picked up a package. I'm not sure of the flavor, does it taste like crayons?

A box of Drake's Devil Dogs salty caramel snack cakes

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 26/08/2026

OURA for Organizations I know this is targeted at healthcare but no doubt it'll become truly dystopian hellscape bullshit soon enough.

Ad for "OURA for Organizations" with the words "See what happens between visits" over a hand wearing an OURA biometric ring.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 26/08/2026

It's soon turning into the spooky season where little ghosts and goblins will be crawling the streets looking for candy. I beg you to PLEASE CHECK YOUR CHILDREN'S CANDY!!!

Bite size 3 Musketeers, KitKat, and Hershey's Dark Chocolate bars that are actually USB drives. The caption above says "Parents, please check your candy. Sickos are going around filling candy with 48 hours of KnowBe4 security training videos."

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 25/08/2026

New corporate headshot, who this?

Bearded middle aged man in faded as hell Magellan fishing shirt standing in nature with pink but glow in the dark blue glasses.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 22/08/2026

Now I am no Photoshop expert, but, I think I can detect some photo manipulation here.

Screenshot from temu of a very giant jacked man in a bright flower printed shirt with a head that is about a third of the size it should be for his body

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 19/08/2026

I freaking love this coffee mug. I was told I'm like a human demotivational poster. <blushes> Also, I can't take selfies to save my life.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 18/08/2026

And this is the lead singer's dad.

Photo of Jerry Haynes who is a children's enterainer that had a show called Peppermint Palace.
He's a white man in glasses with red and white striped jacket and bow tie, with a peppermint striped headband on his straw hat with a beaver puppet on his right shoulder. The 80s were weird.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 16/08/2026

You just don't want to fuck with Canadian engineers.

Two very big and freakishly burly Canadian Army engineers with epic Viking beards.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 11/08/2026

I don't think people rave nearly enough about the Federated Army Warships from Fifth Element. Seriously top 2 or 3 favorite scifi warships.

Screencap from Fifth Element. In the distance is the flaming moon headed to Earth. In the foreground is a Federated Army Warship.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 10/08/2026

Post you from a different era in your life. I'm the one with the lizard camo jacket.

Two fat guys in a never registered 69 Datsun 2000 Roadster racecar. I owned it and it's one of the few vehicles I regret ever selling. Not even vaguely street legal, but it was awesome.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 08/08/2026

I invented maple chia chocolate brownie waffles tonight. My hella pick eater wolfed one down fast. Shit they taste good and im not ask chocolate person at all.

Chocolate waffles piece that is part of a much larger waffle on a white plate. There is a stim toy globe behind it.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 06/08/2026

Sure, you might call your little town white trash, but does your police force hand out gift certificates to liquor stores to reward good driving? Oh Live Oak Texas, you do so complete me.

Woman smiling holding a gift certificate for LOL Liqores given out by the City of Live Oak to reward good driving.
Really.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 06/08/2026

For non-Texans, you are seeing something I honestly wouldn't expect to see in my lifetime. I was born in Pasadena. Pasadena is famous for Urban Cowboy, the Klan bookstore & radio station, and multiple DOJ suits. Never would I expect to see a Dem candidate going there.

Political ad/flyer. Talerico for Texas. New American Dream stylized like a US flag and a list of cities including Pasadena on 8/09.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 03/08/2026

$20 says that Jordan Salinas is about to be featured in a metric shit ton of videos on YouTube. The guy looks like a cool hippie, a healthcare worker, caregiver to his brother, and into horseback riding. The fact he had a can on his 5.7 will do much for the industry.

Photo of Jordan Salinas, with a goatee, black bandana, and black shirt kneeling next to his brother with a lesser goatee, striped sweater, and chinos sitting in a wheelchair.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 29/07/2026

So, um, New Zealand, y'all doing ok?

Woman in black skirt singing heavy metal and gawking at the audience while her bald bassist strums in the background. "New Zealand heavy metal concertgoers left 'crying and vomiting' after guy does a 'massive' poop in the most pit.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 27/07/2026

Blackberry Passport. By far one of the most bad assed phones I'd ever owned...but that was 10 years ago it died off.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 24/07/2026

Playing Anarchy Pancakes with my oldest. Winner gets ice cream . Literally threw my entire hand down before he was able to get a single one placed. I was informed I'm not his real father and he doesn't love me. Dad win.

Stacks of cards from Anarchy Pancakes card game. Also pictured, empty chair where child who no longer loves me was sitting.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 20/07/2026

WTF At the tire shop. Amazing how many vehicles have hotspots built in, it's easily 12 and it's not a big shop. Though that one...what in the fuck.

List of wifi access names of which one is named TheWhitePower

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 12/07/2026

The FBI tested a MAC-10 in a briefcase. To be safe, they literally used string to trigger it. Didn't occur to them it's a heavy recoiling .45 and it instantly flew off the table at the shooting range and spun around firing wildly. Shockingly, nobody was hurt.

Black briefcase with a green interior. Inside is a MAC-10 with small silencer and some accessories with a string around the trigger so it can be fired from inside the case.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 10/07/2026

Being in the Imperial Guard is safer than the army of Russia.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 06/07/2026

Graphic design and copywriting people can feel this pain. We've all been there.

A box of giant dr pepper freeze pops but the word GIANT is spelled GANT on the box.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 25/06/2026

Ordered this bad boy today, as a treat, an honest treat.

Woman holding a coffee mug that says "I accidentally became important at work and it's ruining my life"

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 23/06/2026

Dear lord, I do so love @theonion.com so very much.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 21/06/2026

Star Trek really did know how to tug on the heart strings with scenes like this.

Stolen from Facebook, creator unkown.

Odo from Star Trek is melting away into the pool of good and Kira is saying goodbye in a tear jerking scene, but it's the reflecting pool instead the original pool of goo.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 16/06/2026

There was a line in 24 Hour Party People about how drunks were the worst since they get sweaty and bloated unlike coke or other party drug addicts. I've known a lot of addicts and it's not really that far off.

still from a tv showing coverage of the UFC white house fight. it's joe rogan in an ugly tie that's too short holding a microphone and looking like incredibly bloated and sweaty from clear overuse of steroids and what I can only imagine is a TON of booze. You can see the white House in the background.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 12/06/2026

Holy shit, when you've lost the Babylon Freakin' Bee.

Screenshot of a Babylon Bee article with the title "Trump sets new world record by winning war with Iran 27 times in one year"

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 10/06/2026

Dear lord, talk about looking like her daughter.

Photo of Elizabeth Inglis, mother of Sigourney Weaver. Inglis was very young in this photo and looks freakishly like her daughter.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 08/06/2026

Oh nice, this is pretty woke. Austin is getting a recruiting center dedicated to the worship of a meth addict welfare queen.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 01/06/2026

This sums up so much about San Antonio. A much beloved coyote and grocery bag driving downtown in a blown big block powered shopping buggy honking its horn.

A dragster truck that has been turned into a shopping basket is driving down a main street in downtown San Antonio holding the Spurs Coyote costume and the HEB shopping bag filled with produce waving flags that say Go Spurs Go.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 27/05/2026

The King of the Soft Whites, morbier. If it wasn't hellishly illegal in the United States I would eat it all the time.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 26/05/2026

Carry this business card with me.

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FatGuyOnABike🔒 @fatguyonabike.org · 09/05/2026

Women don't want flowers or chocolate for mother's day, what they really want is 9 mm core bond by the case. Yes, this is ai slop. She's looking at the back of a target not the front. Also she's on the wrong damn side of that firing line. She's literally standing down range.

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