Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 11/06/2026Corporation Tax collywobbles: 1. File tax return in timely manner. 2. Wait a year. 3. Get fined by HMRC for not filing. 4. Send HMRC proof that you did, in fact, file your tax. 5. Get a letter saying you need to file your tax for ONE DAY last year. And so it goes… 050
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 31/05/2026Spare a thought for Arthur Wood, a jobbing library music composer who had only just started receiving appreciable royalties for his work when he died. The theme tune to The Archers. Has there ever been a complete recording of My Native Heath? I only know of recordings of 3 of its 4 movements. 180
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 30/05/2026Lacking a proper Crystal Baschet, I cobbled this together with half a dozen wine glasses, water, a moist finger, and lots of patience. The country was in lockdown. Time was the only thing that wasn’t running short. Double LP, CD, and digital download available now at fasttunes.bandcamp.com 082
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 28/05/2026Tom Baker’s most memorable line. bsky.app/profile/andr... 020
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 28/05/2026In the silent version of Blackmail (1929), the Whites’ loaf is sliced lengthwise. They must have had a huge toaster. In both versions, the knife is revealed to be clean after the murder. This means that Mr Crewe was cooked through. 020
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 28/05/2026Brigit Forsyth told me and my mother I was “a lovely, polite little girl” when I was 8. I was a boy. bsky.app/profile/kayl... 060
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 27/05/2026I was the voice of DEFRA on Farming Today for one week in 2003. bsky.app/profile/kayl... 030
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 25/05/2026Pick a Bond villain from the photos already on your phone. 130
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 24/05/2026Double LP. CD. Digital download. fasttunes.bandcamp.com 085
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 12/11/2025Gavin Sutherland Fans! I’ve found what might be the last surviving sealed copies of 4 albums I recorded for Gavin back in the 2000s. All proceeds to go into the Saving Up For Vol. 2 pot. tinyurl.com/nw95tnurtinyurl.comPardon our interruption... 000
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 08/11/2025SALE! SALE! SALE! PLEASE BUY OUR RECORDS! THE MAJOR WILL NOT STOP SHOUTING! bsky.app/profile/fast... 001
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 01/11/2025PRICES SLASHED IN TIME FOR CHRISTMAS! SURPRISE YOUR LOVED ONES ON CHRISTMAS MORNING WITH A BLAST OF THE SWEENEY! fasttunes.bandcamp.com/album/the-ne... www.ebay.co.uk/itm/40582709... www.ebay.co.uk/itm/40634188... www.ebay.co.uk/itm/40528402...fasttunes.bandcamp.comThe Next Programme Follows Shortly, by The Fast Tunes Orchestra arranged and conducted by Gavin Sutherland50 track album 01614
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 03/09/2025“I’d like to publish the sheet music, Gordon.” “Get onto Hamlyn’s, Freddie. They’re doing the printed merch.” “Won’t they package it as a children’s book? The music is a bit advanced for children.” “It’s 13 bob a copy, Fred. Everybody’s got to learn somewhere.” I’m 49 and I’m struggling with it. 040
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 02/09/2025Trumpton, 1967, and Paul Hamlyn Limited can’t decide on how Mrs Cobbit spells her name. I’m sure Mrs Honeyman would have told them if they’d asked. (Yes, I know. They lived in different towns.) 150
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 01/09/2025Gavin Sutherland's fantastic composition Gairloch Variations is out today on Spotify. Give your ears a treat! open.spotify.com/track/10PWHB...open.spotify.comGairloch Variations 021
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 25/08/2025Badly-framed image of spurious printout intended to suggest something is afoot.jpg 050
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 18/08/2025TV in the background, 20 years ago: “We’re introducing the new Sugababe. And you are…?” “I’m deranged!” At least that’s what I thought she said. I’ve just found out she was actually called Heidi Range. Me with my finger on the pulse of the zeitgeist, there. 071
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 08/08/2025@cheeseford.bsky.social Help me out here. 25 years ago, you played me an LP of old Music Hall artists recorded in the 1960s. The compère introduces one act as making his first appearance since having a limb amputated. What was the album? I thought it was Late Joys on Decca, but it isn’t. 120
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 01/08/2025Oh dear. (NB: not a product of Fast Tunes Ltd.) 020
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 31/07/2025That Ludwig van Beethoven had the tiniest run-out I've ever seen. It was only 5mm from start to finish. Sweet, sweet analogue. 010
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 30/07/2025Pleasing results from a bit of casual vinyl abuse. 010
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 29/07/2025I recently spent a whopping £1.75 on a clean copy of the Sound For Industry Worthington E jingle single. I'm not going to that kind of expense without sharing the love. This is one of my favourites.swisstransfer.comSwissTransfer - Envoi sécurisé et gratuit de gros fichiersEnvoyez jusqu'à 50 Go - Gratuit et sans inscription - Gardez vos transferts jusqu'à 30 jours. 120
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 28/07/2025I seem to have inadvertently attracted some of the best minds when it comes to TV music. Yes, that almost certainly means you. Could you help me with a childhood memory? Bear in mind this is something I saw once, 40 years ago, so there will be some wrong details in there. 116
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 15/07/2025Here I am in 1982, listening to the new Tim Hart Nursery Rhymes LP. The Sennheiser headphones were presumably lent to me purely for the photograph, because I wasn’t normally allowed to touch The Big Stereo or any of its components. See also Astro Wars in its box. 030
Reposted by Fast Tunes LtdRoss McKay @rossmc11.bsky.social · 14/07/2025I have a solution that will improve Masterchef 800% in the process. 618748
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 01/07/2025The Major grumbled darkly about the outlay involved in getting so many records pressed. “In retail, shelf space is king. Knock a sixth off the price and see if that shifts the ruddy things!” The double LP is consequently now £6 cheaper. The Major has spoken! www.ebay.co.uk/itm/40601283...ebay.co.ukPardon our interruption... 010
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 10/06/2025Gavin is going to be on In Tune on Radio 3 this afternoon talking to Petroc Trelawny about The Next Programme Follows Shortly. No pressure, like. www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m...bbc.co.ukBBC Radio 3 - In Tune, The classical soundtrack for your eveningLive music and interviews from the world's finest classical musicians. 0108
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 02/06/2025This time last year, we were putting the finishing touches to the mix. Mandy Watsham Dunstall contributed her wonderful vocals, Janine Fenton got to play an owl, and I was told to leave the vintage U47 alone. 071
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 30/05/2025Thought for the night. Both eBay and Bandcamp deduct VAT from the gross total before paying its sellers. This is presumably to make their accounting less complicated. There is no VAT on postage, however. That means the Exchequer makes 25p it’s not entitled to on every CD sold. The sneaky sods. 131
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 30/05/2025PRICES SLASHED! Actually, Bandcamp adds the VAT on after purchase, so the prices have been adjusted to reflect that. Still, PRICES SLASHED! makes a more attractive headline. Thanks to the customer who pointed out last night that they’d paid double the tax. fasttunes.bandcamp.com/album/the-ne...fasttunes.bandcamp.comThe Next Programme Follows Shortly, by The Fast Tunes Orchestra arranged and conducted by Gavin Sutherland50 track album 021
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 29/05/2025You can now buy the LP and the CD on Bandcamp as well as the download. The EP is still on eBay only because Bandcamp is a bit sniffy about physical-only releases, and we don’t have digital distribution rights for Tyne-Tees. fasttunes.bandcamp.com/album/the-ne...fasttunes.bandcamp.comThe Next Programme Follows Shortly, by The Fast Tunes Orchestra arranged and conducted by Gavin Sutherland50 track album 043
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 28/05/2025SLEEVENOTES. CD buyers will be aware by now there has been a bit of a bish with the typesetting. Digital buyers should be getting a notification about now telling them the pdf booklet has changed. 140
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 28/05/2025The Radiophonic Shed has acquired another noisy object. 061
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 28/05/2025I’d like to say a personal thank you to everybody who has supported us so far. Today is something of a red letter day. After 2 years of haemorrhaging money left, right and centre, today I was able to pay a bit of my input capital back for the first time ever. 1110
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 26/05/2025DIGITAL PEOPLE! WRAP YOUR LUGHOLES AROUND THIS LOAD OF DIGITS! fasttunes.bandcamp.com/album/the-ne...fasttunes.bandcamp.comThe Next Programme Follows Shortly, by The Fast Tunes Orchestra arranged and conducted by Gavin Sutherland50 track album 53619
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 06/05/2025Thank you to everybody who has bought the new album so far. I’m delighted to announce we’ve once again surpassed an actual television star in sales. 180
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 02/05/2025INTERNATIONAL READERS: The Major has worked out how to turn International Postage back on, swearing bitterly that it used to be on by default. BRITISH READERS: The Idents EP is now inclusive of postage. Thank you so much to all of our supporters. www.ebay.co.uk/usr/fasttune...ebay.co.ukfasttunesltd on eBayFollow fasttunesltd on eBay. Buying, Selling, Collecting on eBay has never been more exciting! 033
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 01/05/2025IT’S OUT TODAY! On hearing that we’d received several enquiries, the Major shot up from his morning drink and said “WE CAN’T AFFORD TO TURN DOWN HALF A DOZEN SALES! GET THEM ON EBAY, MAN!” With the website and downloads to follow, I’m proud to say it’s now buyable. Links in comments. 296
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 01/04/2025Having locked Gavin in the cupboard, The Major strode up to the podium. “I want you to play this as if you were Kent House itself facing the wrecking ball.” The Major expects to get a recording contract out of this. He has dropped subtle hints about taking out contracts of his own. 092
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 08/03/2025An update. A bit of necessary behind-the-scenes red tape took much longer than expected, but I’m delighted to report that that’s now all sorted and we can get the CDs manufactured. 2277
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 07/01/2025First rule of merchandising, Spike. Get ‘em ‘ooked. (First rule of Bluesky: no videos over 50MB.) 081
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 07/01/2025The Major wants you to know he’s perfected the world’s first LP made out of custard! Don’t get too excited just yet. There’s paperwork and stuff to complete before we can flog them, but flog them we will. 1222
Reposted by Fast Tunes LtdPete Prodge @peteprodge.com · 31/12/2024All 25 promo videos I produced for @fasttunesltd.bsky.social 's TV themes album can now be viewed on their YouTube channel, in glorious 4K. www.youtube.com/@fasttunesli... * Picture Box * Are You Being Served * Nationwide * Left Bank Two * Doctor Who * and many more!youtube.comFast Tunes LtdWe are Fast Tunes, the smallest recording organisation in the world. Twenty-five years ago, give or take 6 months, vintage telly nerds Gavin Sutherland and Martin Fenton started compiling a list of b... 1167
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 01/01/2025Happy new year, and thank you for your support. I found this years old list of things Gavin and I would have liked to record. We managed some, while others will have to wait. Somehow I don't think we're ever going to get around to Jim'll Fix It, though. Decent couple of tunes, but... 181
Reposted by Fast Tunes LtdTim Worthington @outonbluesix.bsky.social · 26/12/2024In case it got a bit lost amidst the excitement over Wallace/Who/Stacey, here's me and Ben chatting about some possibly slightly less hotly anticipated Christmas Specials of Grange Hill, The Goodies and Roland Rat - The Series... timworthington.org/2024/12/24/l...timworthington.orgLooks Unfamiliar’s Yuletide Binge: Ben Baker – The Fickleness Of The Long Distance RatterLooks Unfamiliar with Ben Baker talking to Tim Worthington about The Goodies: Snow White 2, Roland’s Yuletide Binge, Grange Hill For Christmas and more…! 072
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 23/12/2024Christmas Eve. The Likely Lads. Gavin has cleverly arranged this so it incorporates the different versions used across the TV and radio series, and so it lasts for longer than the original 30 seconds. 065
Fast Tunes Ltd @fasttunesltd.bsky.social · 22/12/2024Day 23. Manège, reproduced on water-filled wine glasses. It took a fortnight. 088