Reposted by emmavoid
what a fantastic all-timer thread on this phenomena and the psychology behind it
I think about this all the time and not understanding this is the difference between successful liminal horror, and just horrorslop. liminal horror is about the baked-in hostility of public spaces we millenials saw die
![taco belle
@ animalologist
Multiple things can be true at once
22h
The purpose of SlutCon is to help ease men who are scared of approaching women, and for women who simply enjoy flirting to be in an environment where that happens a lot, since there's generally a dearth of that
At the same time, many - probably most! - women do Not want to be flirted with or propositioned by men they don't know. When a small scene only has a handful of large, well-known events, each one has disproportionate impact on everybody's ideas of acceptable behavior among other members of their milieu.
Attending the same events = specific shared context. Means
you're somewhat on the same page.
I suspect that the men who publicly raised concerns about SlutCon's impact on the scene are being megaphones for private objections and distresses they've heard from women in the scene who would NOT be comfortable at an event like that, but who don't voice it publicly because they suspect they'd suffer socially for doing so. That going to SlutCon to be flirted with gives women social cachet, and squirming at the idea means you're [not cool, can't get with the program, are probably a wokescold or a prude etc etc other pejoratives] and therefore, that you'll be excluded or held at a distance
Now, if this scene were purely a social scene, that'd be perfectly fine. Don't go to parties that don't suit you!! The issue arises because it's NOT purely a social scene. This scene is inarguably tied up with Al safety, research, and the SF tech scene in general.
When consistently being invited to the right parties is professionally advantageous, and when SlutCon itself **is** going to be an excellent networking opportunity for people in those fields, it's not neutral that {sexual proclivities} are the filtering mechanism that determines who's in the room. It means that promiscuity & forwardness is explicitly professionally advantageous.
And, if the norms of SlutCon influence the norms of that milieu outside of the e…](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:qiknc4t5rq7yngvz7g4aezq7/bafkreibofbhecabcfimcooqfmhfkw5ycfc2adnfedemupo7aihs5fb7voy)
