iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Simon @ellisuk.com · 18h

Skye the doggo pops up to say Hello

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Simon @ellisuk.com · 29/09/2026

It's good but it's no....

Grafitti saying "Les Dennis is coming for all you cunts"

1133

Simon @ellisuk.com · 24/09/2026

Me reading your posts

Rowan Atkinson on Not The Nine O’Clock News playing a government spokesman looking at the latest unemployment figures and saying “oh god, oh god!!!”

010

Simon @ellisuk.com · 15/09/2026

Everyone meet Skye the dog who now lives with us:

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Simon @ellisuk.com · 12/09/2026

Went to see mum at the hospice and she has been moved on to End of Life Care, so was sedated and not conscious. Chatted to her about some of the good times reminded her of some funny anecdotes and also made a new friend with the hospice kitty:

A Ginger Cat relaxes on a plastic visitors chair at a Hospice.

6100

Simon @ellisuk.com · 12/09/2026

Well he for one can follow this advice:

A victorian Gent pointing and saying:

You there: Fuck off. And when you get there, fuck off too. Then fuck off some more. Keep fucking off until you get back here. Then Fuck off

030

Simon @ellisuk.com · 07/09/2026

Well since you ask me to "date myself with an image of my first ever computer". I do have a couple of device images that may satisfy your rather strange request:

The Grandstand Munchman......NOT PACMAN.....Munchman

040

Simon @ellisuk.com · 02/09/2026

Post something random or….don’t I’m not your mum.

The post to The Day of the Dolphin film.

011

Simon @ellisuk.com · 28/08/2026

If you see this, post your getaway vehicle...

The moomins in a boat climbing aboard a ship with Moomin papa saying “Prepare yourselves for tragedy.”

040

Simon @ellisuk.com · 26/08/2026

If you don’t then here it is:

Arkell v Presdram letter:

Dear Sir,
This letter has now been replied to as
We act for Mr Arkell who is Retail Credit Manager of Granada TV Rental Ltd. His attention has been drawn to an article appearing in the issue of Private Eye dated 9th April 1971 on page 4. The statements made about Mr Arkell are entirely untrue and clearly highly defamatory. We are therefore instructed to require from you immediately your proposals for dealing with the matter.
Mr Arkell's first concern is that there should be a full retraction at the earliest possible date in Private Eve and he will also want his costs paid. His attitude to damages will be governed by the nature of your reply.
Yours etc.

Dear Sirs,
We acknowledge your letter of 291h
April referring to Mr. J. Arkell
We nole that Mr Arkell's altitude lo damages will be governed by the nature of our reply and would therefore be grateful if you could inform us what his attitude to damages would be, were he to learn that the nature of our reply is as follows: fuck off.
Yours etc.

Readers will be kept abreast of any
further developments.

030

Simon @ellisuk.com · 24/08/2026

Well to those sniggering I say…..

Withnail saying “what fucker said that?”

000

Simon @ellisuk.com · 16/08/2026

Just like the moon pizza goes In search of his dream of cheese I search for peppers

Shirley Bassey belting out a classic at the top of her voice.

030

Simon @ellisuk.com · 15/08/2026

I only wanted to watch Canal Journeys your honour!

The body of an email which says: Channel 4 suggests starting with 24 hours in Police custody.

040

Simon @ellisuk.com · 07/08/2026

There was one guest horrified that we didn't have New York, New York as the final song but I will have to quote the words of Peter Cook's esteemed publishing company in response to Arkell.

The text from the original Arkell v Pressdram:

Dear Sir,

We act for Mr Arkell who is Retail Credit Manager of Granada TV Rental Ltd. His attention has been drawn to an article appearing in the issue of Pricate Eye dated 9th April 1971 on page 4. The statements made about Mr Arkell are entirely untrue and clearly highly defamatory. We are therefore instructed to require from you immediately your proposals for dealing with the matter. Mr Arkell's first concern is that there should be a full retraction at the earliest possible date in Pricate Eye and he will also want his costs paid. His attitude to damages will be governed by the nature of your reply. Yours etc.

This letter has now been replied to as follows:

Dear Sirs,

We acknowledge your letter of 291h April referring to Mr. J. Arkell We note that Mr Arkell's attitude to damages will be governed by the nature of our reply and would therefore be grateful if you could inform us what his attitude to damages mould be, were hee to learn that the nature of our reply is as follows: fuck off.

Yours etc.

Readers will be kept abreast of any further developments.

010

Simon @ellisuk.com · 03/08/2026

Once again I find myself pointing to Paul Eddington for how to be remembered.

Paul Eddington quote: "A journalist once asked me what I would like my epitaph to be and I said I think I would like it to be,
'He did very little harm'.
And that's not easy. Most people seem to me to do a great deal of harm. If I could be remembered as having done very little, that would suit me."

04213

Simon @ellisuk.com · 31/07/2026

Only one response to that:

Stephen Fry on mishearing Hugh Laurie to pass the marmalade asks: You want me to fart the hit parade?

131

Simon @ellisuk.com · 30/07/2026

Shouldn't need to say this but fuck it the world is going to shite in a handcart and some bastard fitted a V8 engine.

It's the bit from Glengarry Glenross but instead of Always Be Closing it's Always Be Punching Nazi's

000

Simon @ellisuk.com · 27/07/2026

Well he needs to be careful he doesn’t end up like this poor chap:

Peter Serafinowicz as Terry Wogan having a whitey on Points of View.

120

Simon @ellisuk.com · 25/07/2026

Ok let’s see if @michaelspicer.bsky.social turns up for this or if it’s all been a long con. 🤣

The stage for the Dorking venue of Michael Spicer’s tour.

130

Simon @ellisuk.com · 25/07/2026

Well the first time I saw one of the adverts all I could hear was:

Robbie Coltrane as Doctor Johnson in Blackadder III exclaiming SAUSAGE!

130

Simon @ellisuk.com · 25/07/2026

Did he interrupt the panel for:

An advert for the fake show Bitch Hunter from the tv show 30 Rock.

060

Simon @ellisuk.com · 18/07/2026

In “Bands from the 1990’s you didn’t expect to be playing a gig in the coffee shop you’re currently in” news.

Advert for a toploader gig at the login lounge coffee shop on the 15th October.

430

Simon @ellisuk.com · 17/07/2026

I see the Daily Mail are having a normal one this Saturday with a panic over Andy Burnham becoming PM, gushing obsequious praise for Boris Johnson in Ukraine and a photo of the suspect in Ann Widdecombe’s murder all on the front page.