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Ellie Evans

@elbeast.in
592 followers 531 following 666 posts

El Beastie aka ellieAPI aka veritastrophe aka evansekeful internet loreist // miner at the spreadsheet factory // reply bae // complex systems enthusiast

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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 29/04/2026
i did it
shows updated handle as elbeast.in domain
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 22/11/2025
without downloading new pics, what is it like dating you?
Charlie Day with the Pepe Silvia conspiracy board
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 17/11/2025
What Perfect Album came out the year you turned 16?
QUEENS OF THE STONE AGE
SONGS FOR THE DEAF
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 15/11/2025
we already have one tho
Screen cap from the 2009 film where the wild things are
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 14/11/2025
so much better than a piss tape
Copy of Epstein email with part highlighted that insinuates Putin has a photo of Trump blowing Bill Clinton
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 19/09/2025
cat has really been pulling me through it too
tiny black tuxedo cat staring judgingly at what is presumed to be his “owner.”
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 04/07/2025
Shear was this close to becoming the CEO of OpenAI and they all sound like this.
Emmett Shear: Let's play an imagination game! What is the opposite of a population decreasing due to death? It's a tricky riddle because usually everyone thinks the opposite of death is immigration, but l'll give a hint there is another secret way that new people can come to exist!

Rota: Why are you speaking to me like that?
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 06/04/2025
how long does it take to build an industrial scale fabrication factory, michael? six months?
Lucille Bluth from the scene where she assume a banana is cheap at a cost of $10 in the TV show Arrested Development
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 20/01/2025
cat told me the vibes are off
tuxedo cat facing away from camera staring under a grey couchtuxedo cat staring at the camera as if to convey his thoughts on what he saw under the couch in prior photo
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 09/01/2025
i have aspirations
The Sleepytime tea bear in pajamas sleeping cozily in a chair in front of the fire, presumably as a result of the Sleepytime tea sitting next to him and being hella cozy. The cat is on the rug on the floor.
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 06/01/2025
this hurts so bad
cut in side of pinky finger tip that is bleeding under the finger nail
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 12/12/2024
lacks the emotional depth of closing over 2pts down to achieve true greatness
Screenshot of the closing value of Microsoft stock at $420.69 on October 1st 2024
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 08/12/2024
real
Letterboxd review by user nickusen for the 1998 movie Pi watched Mar 14, 2021 that states “this movie is a documentary about what happens when I drink too much iced coffee”
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 03/12/2024
this guy has an honorary msis as far as i’m concerned, class of 2021
little tuxedo cat sleeping on a comforter
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 02/12/2024
Post an onion headline that lives in your head rent-free.
Man Just 3 More Failed Goals Away From Becoming Crypto Guy
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 01/12/2024
“‘No way to prevent this’ says only nation where this regularly happens” is low hanging fruit but it’s an all-timer. I also saved this one because I turned 27 in 2013 and this was exactly what I was doing.
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 30/11/2024
it’s been real, charlotte
My sister (left) dressed as a cow and me dressed in a skirt, jean jacket, and cow print cowboy hat posing at a party A drawing of a humanoid cat dated 11/9/24 and labeled “Phillip, he/they” with a speech bubble that says “meYOW”Text conversation that goes as follows:

Receiver: Breakfast
Kris got really good cheese I'll try and conserve so you can try

Sender: I got sucked into a Melissa
McArthy movie lol

Receiver: Is it Tammy? Lol

Sender: Yes lol
A turtle made out of a champagne bottle top on a marble counter
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 23/11/2024
lol
Screenshot showing this skeet flagged as intolerance
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 23/11/2024
“hey why don’t you turn the bomb off?” i’ve decided i would be this guy
Will Patton as Chick in the movie Armageddon
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 20/11/2024
get it together, seattle city light
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 19/11/2024
literally what i texted my dad the day after, i’m letting it wash over me and taking small comfort in the practical
Text exchange where the sender says “I don't have the mental energy to do this again” and the reply says “Me either”
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 19/11/2024
after the enshittification comes the cleanse 🙏🏻
Wojak looking at the sunset with tears in his eyes
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 18/11/2024
i really wanted to listen to this song and got the bonus of seeing matt maeson’s spotify bio
く
Matt Maeson
3,471,504
monthly listeners
Just got asked if I was the singer of Coldplay at my hotel right after I played an arena. Once I got into my room I was super tired but also really hungry so l grabbed some chips from the mini bar but I didn't look at the label and they were unbelievably spicy habanero chips and I'm just stuck on why would you have habanero chips as an option in a hotel room? Like the market for people that enjoy habanero chips has to be very niche right? My mouth is on fire and I can't wash it out so l'm just distracting myself by typing this
Posted by Matt Maeson
Cringe - Stripped
Matt Maeson
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 18/11/2024
pov
squidward looking out of the window in a dark room to spongebob and patrick having fun outside
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 18/11/2024
took this screenshot the day after Election Day after yelling “not now Duolingo!” at my phone
The ghost of the Duolingo bird crying while saying “Betrayal!”
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 17/11/2024
🙏🏻
99 names of allah butt plug ornament
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 17/11/2024
agreed
Freddie Prince Jr in She’s All That on a TV with the caption “she kind of blew me off.
(CHUCKLES)”
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 16/11/2024
an assortment of cuban pastelitos in the right shapes
tray of cuban pastelitos
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 15/11/2024
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 15/11/2024
this is what i imagine it’s probably like
diddy kong riding an ostrich
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 15/11/2024
when you haven’t reached your daily brat quota
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 15/11/2024
“Where do you see yourself in four years”
Gavin Newsom holding an assault rifle while captioned saying “To the members of the United States Supreme Court,”
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 15/11/2024
I am tired, so unbelievably tired, so hilariously and alarmingly tired
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 15/11/2024
excel told me to fuck off and go to bed
A laptop on my bed showing a very frozen Excel workbook
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 15/11/2024
Hellthread we were there together rock and roll noises
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 14/11/2024
remember this banger?
Obama shaking hands with Trump while looking at the camera like a very tired and disappointed dad.
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 14/11/2024
i would like if this posting king came back here
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 14/11/2024
holding himbs feets while himbs sleeps
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 13/11/2024
matt gaetz face that’s it that’s the skeet
Matt Gaetz at the RNC after bad cosmetic procedures
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 13/11/2024
every time someone references the princess bride it triggers a core memory of having a childhood crush on cary elwes but not telling anyone because i could never remember his name
Cary Elwes being a hottie
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 12/11/2024
cute big kitty
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 06/02/2024
Preparing for new bluesky users
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 06/02/2024
reinstate hellthread
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 08/07/2023
the energy im tryna bring to the skyline
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 08/07/2023
i think about this photo almost every day at work
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 06/07/2023
annual planning runs from march to the end of july and my emails to my boss are becoming increasingly unhinged
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 15/05/2023
called it
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 14/05/2023
got some work done this week and reconsidered my life choices what did i miss?
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 11/05/2023
this is where i skeet from
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Ellie Evans @elbeast.in · 11/05/2023
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