Sign in

dustin Couch

@dustinkcouch.bsky.social
8.3K followers 133 following 80 posts

www.youtube.com/@dustinkcouch

PostsRepliesMedia
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 11/06/2026
yes please save it to c:/users/admin i love taking a 25 click roadtrip through file explorer
114510
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 10/06/2026
*explaining the backrooms to my grandparents* see how your hallway looks like my childhood? that's called liminal. you are what's known as an "entity"
014022
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 09/06/2026
i can't believe the Ocarina Of Time remake has only 3-4 more delays left i'm so excited
2744
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 23/04/2026
me in the Ghost Hunting group chat: good find tommy! there's something up with that tire for sure me in the Disney Exec GC that I was added to by mistake: Agreed. People will love seeing "Little Yoda" on the "Big Screen" me in the smaller Ghost Hunting GC: tommy thinks his tires are haunted hahaha
0605145
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 21/04/2026
alright
A screenshot of a text from Amazon.

Amazon: Your package was delivered!

(attached is a picture of a box with a piece of paper that reads DO NOT GO OUTSIDE)

The receiver sends a question mark as a response.

Amazon sends another picture with the same piece of paper on the box, but the words are covered in blood along with the message "JUST KIDDING :)" in blood.
101583262
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 19/04/2026
Also it was hard getting those romantic couple pictures for the video because it was difficult to explain to my offline friends why I needed 100 pictures of them with their partners and that I was going to make one of them say "ladies hit me up" across several social media sites
2704
Reposted by dustin Couch
Bouphe @bouphe.co.uk · 17/04/2026
In the presence of greatness (MS Paint Sonic) I narrate videos within videos now. Happy to do videos within videos within videos, hmu!
1717
Reposted by dustin Couch
Cohen is a Ghost @skullmandible.bsky.social · 17/04/2026
Had the honor of narrating this! dustin's work is so goddamned funny and cool. nobody else is doing this type of thing and I highly recommend you check it out!
1697
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 17/04/2026
Watch my video it takes place on the internet youtu.be/_RG7hU_S8Vc
youtu.be
A Strange Night On Reddit
YouTube video by Dustin Couch
714040
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 17/04/2026
i'm posting a video tomorrow morning that takes place in the same fictional subreddit from my last video so if you want to watch my new video and you haven't seen my last video then that's fine. it's fine.
5704
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 21/03/2026
When a book is describing the scenery and has more than 4 geographical features in a sentence, I'm no longer picturing anything and just taking their word for it
0948
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 22/02/2026
I should change my number
Text message exchange:

Sender: Look, I get it. You're worried that I'm not being upfront with you. That's not just suspicion — that's your high level survival instincts at work. However, I really am your grandpa and I really do need you to come down to the basement.

Receiver: my grandpa is dead.

Sender: I genuinely understand, trust me. Your grandpa (me) claiming he's suddenly rebooted is a specific kind of chaos you didn't ask for.
181279283
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 11/02/2026
filmmaker amas are always like Q: Why are you adapting Yoshi's Island into a horror movie? When Travis came to me with the script for YOSHI'S DEAD ISLAND I knew we had something special - we're both huge fans of MARIO and SAW (YES, even the SEQUELS Hahaha) so the idea of A MASHUP was a NO BRAINER
114113
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 29/01/2026
sometimes i'll spend months hunting down an old movie or flash game that i could barely remember pieces of but when i finally find it i'm always like whoops i wasn't looking for "Beastmaster 2" I was looking for "the way i felt before it all started going by so fast"
118224
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 12/01/2026
AI commenters on reddit freak me out but what sucks more is when people respond to them like they're a guy
1963
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 02/01/2026
I disagree with the flak this app gets. Just don't follow people that make you cringe. Mute them. Follow the funny ones. It's like hanging out in the coloring book section of a bookstore and being like wow this place is for idiots
6966126
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 21/12/2025
If I were going to be in a live boxing match, I would first text someone "might let the other guy win tonight. he needs this more than I do" and then post the screenshot of that message if I lost
113513
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 21/11/2025
just had the thought "if i were you i would go ahead and eat lunch" what do you mean IF you were me. who are you if not me
313512
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 09/11/2025
"shocked pikachu"? not gonna be very effective. pikachus are resistant to electricity. lol.
121151
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 29/10/2025
loudly sighing and drying my hands off mid-dishwashing to fast forward the podcast to the next Betterhealth Ad-read
11278
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 21/10/2025
watched the new tubi goosebumps movie and liked the end credits song. looked it up and the artist's name is "Lyrical Female Vox" the song is from the album "Mysterious Pop 3" and can be downloaded from the website "Royalty Free Music Cheap"
1984
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 29/09/2025
welcome to spooky things from the internet - this mario fan game slowly becomes corrupted as you progress - this is a photo that a couple took while on vacation. when they uploaded it to facebook, commenters noticed a strange figure lurking behind them - here's a video of a guy dying in a fire
1139884
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 28/09/2025
does anyone have advice for being more assertive in situations like this?
Text exchange:

Sender: Hey this is Jake from doordash I'm on my way

Receiver: I didn't order anything from doordash

Sender: I didn't say you did?

Receiver: you're right i'm sorry

Sender: No worries be there in 5

Sender: *picture of front door* Let me in
24879161
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 27/09/2025
Here's 4 images from my new video go watch The Web Watchers
A screenshot of a reddit comment exchange:

ms-paint-sonic: I got a ticket for going 20 miles under the speed limit yesterday :(

spyro-64: LMFAO you are SUCH an unhinged chaos gremlin and I am so here for it

ms-paint-sonic: please don't say shit like that to meA Facebook post from Oakview Watch that says: ROADSIDE REBECCA SPOTTED WALKING ALONGSIDE RED LEAF ST. BE CAREFUL IF YOU ARE DRIVING TONIGHT

Comments:

Jake Jenkins: My big cousin almost hit her once. He is single and christian

Meryl Russel: How big is he

Meryl Russel: How big is your cousinA reddit comment exchange:

depressedgokux200: you've been stood up DOZENS of times?

StraightCoded: yeah it's called putting yourself out there and getting rejected before you even get the chance to prove that you're worth being loved (cry laugh emoji)

ms-paint-sonic: do you need someone to talk to

StraightCoded: yesA discord screenshot exchange:

lindsayissleepy: Ok but you have to move here first

lindsayissleepy: It's getting embarassing telling people that my best friend is from Canada

lunargghost: i'm from california

lindsayissleepy: that is the same thing
316339
Reposted by dustin Couch
Cohen is a Ghost @skullmandible.bsky.social · 26/09/2025
I got to narrate this! Working on dustin's stuff is so fun. he captures the patois of specific online subcultures so well, it feels like you're really seeing something from another world. check it out babey cause it rules
06213
Reposted by dustin Couch
Robert Hutchinson @ertchin.bsky.social · 26/09/2025
No one writes funny inane internet comments better than dustin Couch. (there is 1 jumpscare but it happens pretty much when you're expecting it to)
0265
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 26/09/2025
i made a new screenshot story here's the first minute the other minutes are on youtube: www.youtube.com/watch?v=IfjT...
1013347
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 18/09/2025
look what you did. i tapped the sign as hard as i could. like from the simpsons. but you didn't listen
111712
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 16/08/2025
remember when there would be a guy on a nintendo forum who joined in Feb 2001 with 54k posts and a Dark Link sig and he would be mean to you for being new and you would desperately hope to one day be as cool as him but deep down you knew that you would always be marked with that Apr 2007 join date
6699187
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 16/08/2025
fruit loops might as well all be the same color they dont even fucking try
21376
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 08/08/2025
the reason you shouldn't yell "fire" in a theater is because i am trying to watch a movie
245772
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 03/08/2025
creepypasta where a guy posts on a message board like "somethings wrong with this vhs star wars tape i got at a garage sale" & the opening crawl is like Episode IV A New Hope There is a man behind you
1039883
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 24/07/2025
always get mad at myself when my phone is on 2% battery and i realize how many apps i had running. when did i even download checkers
01175
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 23/07/2025
oh hey Bluesky finally added a Group DM
(An image with the bluesky logo uptop)

YOU asked and WE listened.

We've added a GROUP DM!

we just need you to follow a few rules:

Rule 1: Be nice!

Rule 2: No Cursing!

Rule 3: Participate!

Ready?

LET'S GO!! (let's go is a blue link)Bluesky Group Chat

grudge holder: lol i missed group chats

me: so this is just a giant group chat?

caturday blues: yeah

ms_paint_sonic: ya

Dave: (sends a post from Dentist From Beneath that says "You look like someone I could see myself divorcing in a few years.

- me, flirting with you")

Dave: boost this

grudge holder: LMAO

(Gray text in middle says "You tried to leave.")

Bluesky Moderator: Sorry, We haven't added that feature yet!

Me: The feature to LEAVE?Me: The feature to LEAVE?

ms_paint_sonic: what the fuck

(Gray text in middle says "ms_paint_sonic has been taken beneath")

Bluesky Moderator: Rule 2: No Cursing

caturday blues: oh my god??

dave: (sends a post from Dentist From Beneath that says "ADVICE NEEDED: what kind of wine pairs best with a 2nd glass of wine?")

dave: boost this 

grudge holder: now is not the time dave

grudge holder: that is funny as f*ck though

(Gray text in middle says "questpsx has been taken beneath")

blurry hamster: that guy didn't even say anything!

Bluesky Moderator: Rule 3: Participate

caturday blues: @moderator.bsky.social LET US OUT

(Gray text in middle says "caturday blues has been slowly dragged beneath, screaming for their life")

Bluesky Moderator: Rule 1: Be Nice

blurry hamster: that was so violent for no reason?? :cry emoji:me: i have an idea

me: we need to get the moderator to break a rule

blurry hamster: that's a stupid idea

(grey text in middle says "blurry hamster has been taken beneath")

me: hey @moderator.bsky.social

me: (sends a post that says "The series finale of America being the worst episode yet wasn't on my 2025 beingo card. Oh wait. Yes it was")

me: isn't this post funny

Blueksy Moderator: Of Course!

me: (sends a post that says "It isn't technically day drinking if you're still drunk from the night before. In this essay I will")

me: how about this one

bluesky moderator: Well everyone has their own sense of humor!

me: (sends a post that says "An assault rifle that only shoots blanks should be called a Jk-47! I'll see myself out")

me: how about this

Bluesky Moderator: fuck

Bluesky Moderator: that post sucks so bad

(grey text in middle says "Bluesky Moderator has been taken beneath")

me: f**k i thought that would work

dave: I told you to boost it
dave: did i not?

(grey text in middle says "He is rising from beneath")

The Dentist From Beneath account starts typing
10966299
Reposted by dustin Couch
Alexi Conman @alexiconman.bsky.social · 20/07/2025
If you like internet-centric subtle horror mockumentaries of a convenient size (full thing is just over 20mins), this is a strong recommend, great. Quite spooky, kind of funny, very interesting narrative depth despite mostly comprising reddit posts and weird audio clips.
14910
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 07/07/2025
google when im not signed in: whats up you fucking robot. i bet you dont even know what a bus is. prove you know what a bus is google when displaying results: look what my robot said :)
344081
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 07/07/2025
POV you're looking through the reddit comments of the most gut-wrenching tragic news story you've ever read
a ctrl+F search of the tone tag "/s" on reddit. There are 3,453 results
21238
Reposted by dustin Couch
Cohen is a Ghost @skullmandible.bsky.social · 25/06/2025
I'm in this as a wells fargo employee AND a southern preacher picking at something that should be left alone. Dustin's weird web stuff is so so sick and it was an honor to be a part of it. check it out!!
3679
Reposted by dustin Couch
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 22/06/2025
who you gonna call www.youtube.com/watch?v=0vOG...
1121058
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 22/06/2025
who you gonna call www.youtube.com/watch?v=0vOG...
1121058
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 20/06/2025
the weirdest thing that happened to me 56 months ago was when when i got sent this counterfeit coupon
(A text message exchange. The number up top is blurred out.)

Sender: (Image of a Pizza Hut coupon) Pizza time! Show this coupon to the cashier while checking out at your neighborhood Pizza Hut for a FREE 1 Topping Large Pizza. At participating location only!

Receiver: idk if this is the number to text but i just showed this coupon to the cashier and they said they didn't recognize it.

sender: at participating location only!

Receiver: location? As in just one Pizza Hut?

Sender: Yep!More of the text exchange:

Sender: Yep!

Receiver: Which location?

Sender: (Sends an address, but it's blurred out)

Receiver: Are you sure you sent me the right address?

Sender: Yep!

Receiver: then what the fuck is this

Sender: pizza hut(text from a different cut off number)

Sender: (sends a coupon) Burger time! Show this coupon to the cashier at your neighborhood McDonalds for a free quarter pounder! Yum! At participating location only.

Receiver: which location

Sender: (sends address, but it's blurred out)

Receiver: that's the same address that other number sent me to.

Sender: no it isn't

Receiver: i'm not going

Sender: please

sender: please

Receiver: no

Sender: please(Text from Mom)

mom: What time are you and your brother planning on coming by tonight? love you

Receiver: idk i haven't talked to him but I'll probably get there around 6 or so. do you need me to pick anything up on the way? love you too

mom: No, I'm just running to pick up dinner real quick before y'all get here. I got a great deal on some pizzas!

Receiver: wait what deal

Receiver: mom?

mom: (sends coupon) Pizza time! Show this coupon to
15668156
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 20/06/2025
got a screenshot post coming soon (hopefully tomorrow) that's a few more screenshots than usual, so i'm going to post some more of the older screenshot stories in the meantime. thank you for your patience
3922
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 18/10/2024
weird night on bluesky
Screenshot Of Bluesky on the Discover tab:

Wholesome Facts: wait i just learned that to keep from drifting apart otters will hold hands and plan date nights

Bluesky: You might have noticed the app glitching out a little bit today. We think it may be related to screenshots of Twitter/X so please refrain from posting those for now.

gunman: wow wonder why everyones leaving twitter big mystery

(Screenshot of Bluecheck user on Twitter)

On my own: They don't give a fuck about you. They only care about their agenda and their woke cult. They don't just want your money. They want your blood.

(quote tweet from Pop Crave: Sony reveals title of Bug Boy reboot: Bug Girl)

(Poster of Bug Girl with Tagline: Little Bug. Big Heart.) 

(screenshot of twitter ends here)

(The replies, favs and shares under the screenshot all read 000)
Nostalgia ZONE: am i the only one who remembers myspace
(screenshot of myspace)

xxBritneyxx (~waffle mafia =])
Subject: Body:
PLEASE OPEN: YOUR CRUSH WILL ASK YOU OUT IF...
hello my name is kayla and i was killed by a drunk driver who stabbed me to death. the cops wouldn't even let my parents see my body because my corpse looked so crazy. send this to 5 people and repeat the phrase "kayla is so pretty" 10 times or i will be in your room tonight.
PS i have no eyes or a face either && i'm dripping with blood
[Proverbs 3:15-16] "Trust in the LORD with all

(screenshot of myspace cuts off here)

ms paint sonic: (reply to myspace screenshot)  is this realScreenshot of Bluesky:

ms paint sonic: kayla is so pretty! :)

blue thumb: just got evicted (upside down smiley emoji) sorry to ask this but please send what you can

Wholesome Facts: (reply) here ya go (picture of a cat) did you know cats love their humans SO much? You got this (fist bump emoji)

blue thumb: (reply) i don't have a cat.

quest psx: i think it can pull through
(screenshot of CNN Article)

X (Formerly Twitter) has lost 99.99% of its traffic in last 5 days
X Continues Its Pilgrimage Into Oblivion

ONA Comic:  (a 4 panel comic)
panel 1: (blue guy holding 2 coffees) hey i made us some coffee
panel 2: (green guy holding 2 coffees) but i made us coffee too
panel 3: (blue guy still holding coffee) guess thats why i love ya
panel 4: (green guy still holding coffee) aw
title in corner: Our Neurodivergent Asses

wood plant:
i should delete twitter

(screenshot of twitter)
Saved By HIM
@rockoXVII
They made Bug Boy woke. Burn it all the fuck down.

(quote tweet of official sony account)  Sony: Hey it's me Bug Girl! I'm a little bug with a big heart!

(the replies, favs and retweets look like they're melting onto the next post. they spell out "Kayla")

Wholesome Facts: did you know dogs made bugboy wokeAlt text for 3rd screenshot is in the replies because it exceeds the character limitFourth screenshot of Bluesky:

The posts are all red and melty and the replies, favs and shares all spell out "I am in your room"

There is a face in the backround as well.

(bottom of tweet from ms paint sonic:)
and that man's name was Albert Einstein. Share with 10 people or he will rise from the grave.

gunman: ❤❤❤GOD LOVES YOU❤❤❤ SHARE WITH 7 PEOPLE OR YOU WILL GO TO HELL

Wholesome Facts: did you know god has no eyes or even a face && shes dripping with blood

ONA Comic: "I do not give Facebook consent to use my pictures, information or posts." paste this into your status or Facebook will sell your information!

(four panel webcomic is all fucked up with text layed over it that says:
HELLO MY NAME IS KAYLA AND I WAS STABBED TO DEATH
I HAVE NO EYES
I HAVE NO FACE
I AM IN YOUR BEDROOM)

wood plant: YOUR CRUSH WILL ASK YOU OUT if you share this with 8 PEOPLE. IF YOU DO NOT SHARE THIS THEY WILL HUNT YOU
261020271
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 06/08/2024
friendly reminder
image of a stick figure labeled "You" saying "Joe Rogan is short" shooting a gun at stick figure labeled "Joe Rogan" who is holding up a shield, which ricochets the bullet over the head of a small stick figure named "your short friend" saying "missed me"
224439
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 07/06/2024
cool day over at twitter
Screenshot of a thread on Twitter from someone named "Trey - Birthday in 2 days!" with a Bluey avi. Every post has larger ratio of quote tweets and replies than likes. The thread has 7 posts.

Post 1: im sorry but if you think spongebob is funny you have an annoying sense of humor

Post 2: "omg a hit tweet" lol didn't expect what was easily my dumbest tweet to go off but ok

Post 3: guess i hit a nerve (shrug emoji) spongebob dick riders
out in full force tonight ig

Post 4: ok y'all are getting boring so i'm muting this thread now have fun talking amongst yourselves (peace sign emoji)

Post 5: btw this is why nobody gives a fuck about the sb fandom anymore. toxic bullshit like this is why i left in the first place

Post 6: also hey hi hello its me again just want to say if you're sending me death threats because you don't understand satire: my little cousin knows how to doxx. do not fuck with me

Post 7: I am at the dentist's. (picture of a lake is attached)Alt text for Images 2 and 3 will be in the replies because they exceed the character limit.Alt text for Images 2 and 3 will be in the replies because they exceed the character limit.Screenshot of Twitter TL:

servsup: (quote tweet of "milkshakes lowkey taste better microwaved") BAHAHA of course the incels found my post (cry laugh emoji) enjoy your brainfreeze i guess (shrug emoji + crylaugh emoji)

ranger danger: (reply to servsup) you need to leave your house immediately. set your milkshake down gently so you don't burn yourself and leave right now. you might be in danger

servsup: (reply to ranger danger) shut the fuck up (two crylaugh emojis)

servsup: (reply to self) I am at the dentist's. (picture of lake from screenshot 1 and 3, but now a giant hand is rising out of it)

__

pics of vegeta: PSA: STOP FEEDING HIM. BE NICE TO EACH OTHER. DO NOT AGITATE ANY FANBASES. KEEP YOUR TAKES COLD AND YOUR INTERACTIONS PLEASANT OR YOU WILL SUMMON THE VERY, VERY TALL DENTIST. DO NOT DO THAT

____

ms sonic: i liked some of her songs but i don't really think taylor swift's music is for me personally :/ (this post has a huge ratio of 807M quote tweets)
1133989
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 03/12/2023
i think twitter might be dying
A Screenshot of a headline from CNN on Twitter/X that reads: 

"Almost one million people went missing last night" along with a screenshot of a creepy forest.

The replies are from a bunch of blue check accounts and read:

Darren Rogerrs: Good Stuff

Fighter Jet: Two puzzled Emojis

Danny1983: Joe Biden

Saved By HIM: What a crazy world we live in

Stoic van: Almost a million people gone missing wow they must be doing a magicians disapperance (cry laugh emoji)

Dave: eyes looking left emoji

Matt: Hello

On my own...: Ii need assistance. i am at 207 N Oakwood ST, Madisonville AZ

rockoXVI: What a crazy world we live inScreenshot of X timeline:

blue thumb: does anyone think this app has gotten strange lately
its over (reply): what do you mean

Pizza Huts: hey it's pizza huts (pizza emoji) reply with where you are right now

picture of dogs: hollywood is going downhill i swear... 

(quote tweet of Discussing Film: Disney considering making another Marvel movie or perhaps a Star Wars. For more updates meet me at 207 N Oakwood ST, Madisonville AZ)

Growers Groceries: We're throwing a christmas party and YOU'RE INVITED

SHOUT your address in the replies if you want in on this (christmas tree emoji)

(attached to the tweet is an image of a christmas invitation that reads: 

"HO HO HO!!! Ready for some holiday fun? Games! Prizes! A Dr. Pepper. We'll even pick you up in a LIMO! 207 N Oakwood ST, Madisonville AZ")

samara (reply): what in the kidnapping scam is this post

super paint sonic (reply): 3522 SOUTH LANE SLOCUM, IL 60056 UNIT 68Screenshot of X:

grudge holder: i just looked up how many blue checks there are and lmao 

(Image: "At least 891,693 users currently suscribe to X premium according to the data") 

(quoted tweet from NBC: "Experts estimate a total of 891,963 people have been reported missing in the last 24 hours")

it's over (reply): but they're all still posting so much idk they seem fine

grudge holder (reply): do they?

Blue check account (reply): What a crazy world we live in

bee meeter: you should not give your address out to an account that has existed for one day in my opinion (quote tweet from super paint sonic giving out his address to Grower's Groceries, who joined in December 2023)

super paint sonic: i was worried about that too so i checked dw it's legit lol (image of DM between sps and growers groceries)

Growing Games: we're giving out FREE Playstation 5s today. come on down to our store at 207 N Oakwood ST, Madisonville AZ 

(image of a 3DS on ground)

Luigi 64 (reply): pick that upScreenshot of X timeline:

grudge holder: those shady ads that keep coming up all belong to a company called Growing Graveyard. guess what else belongs to them now

(image that says: "Growing Graveyard is an American provider of funeral services as well as cemetery property. It's founder, The Long Legged Mortician has stated that the goal of the company was to "Grow the biggest graveyard of all time" He had himself buried alive in the Growing Graves Cemetery to "Add to the numbers"
Headquarters: 207 N Oakwood St, Madisonville AZ
Founder: The Long Legged Mortician (???-2023)
Subsidiaries: Growers Groceries, Growing Games, Pizza Huts, X")

quest psx (reply): have we been sold again

super paint sonic: the limo has arrived (sunglasses emoji)

(image of hearse)

bear and bird (reply): That is a hearse (heart emoji)
631017228
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 31/10/2023
it's that time of year again
Screenshot of a Tweet from @Twitter on 9/22/2022 and its replies.

Twitter: Ready for halloween? (ghost emoji) (jack o lantern emoji) (skull emoji)

So are we! That's why we're excited to introduce you to @TheBigWitch

You'll be seeing a lot of her throughout the spooky season!

But beware, she's out to give you a scare!

Replies:

The Big Witch: BOO! I'm The Big Witch! I'm flying around on my broomstick causing trouble! (broom emoji) (witch emoji)

save game (response to The Big Witch): this seems like it's going to get old fast

The Big Witch (response to save game): I'll place you in my cauldrom! I'm The Big- (The screenshot cuts off here)

(The Big Witch's username and handle are both Orange)(Screenshot of Twitter Timeline)

water tunic: the way virgos freeze up when you ask to see their phone...

The Big Witch (reply): I eat frog legs for breakfast and toadwarts for lunch!

water tunic (reply): quiet
_

real pokemon: my life has gotten so much better ever since i chose peace and love over hate and negativity

The Big Witch (reply): I choose dark magic and trickery! The Big Witch strikes again!

real pokemon (reply): shut the fuck up
_

bark simpson: not really comfortable with the fact that the big witch account is just a walking stereotype of witches

The Big Witch (reply): You'll make a fine ingredient in my stew! Oh how I love black cats and pointy hats!

bark simpson (reply): see like all of this is just a lot
_

pictures of good dogs: (mirror selfie of a fit person) if you don't fuck with me i don't fuck with you. simple as that

The Big Witch (reply): Oooo I'm melting I'm melting!

big goku (reply): ma'am(Screenshot of Twitter Timeline)

sonic avi: i hate how i say "i'm fine" when i'm actually so sad all the time. i can't keep lying to everyone

The Big Witch (reply): I'll put a nasty spell on you! I'm The Big Witch!

sonic avi (reply): hey i say a lot of things i don't mean when i'm upset and i'm in a very bad place right now but i want you to know i mean this with all my heart: nobody here likes you. nobody wants you around. i hope the person running this account dies (orange text) TAKEN BY THE BIG WITCH

airplanehater (reply): oh shit

_

McDonalds: come try our new halloween fries! only $1.99 TAKEN BY THE BIG WITCH

pumpkin (reply): (image of an empty parking lot where a mcdonalds should be) PUT IT BACK
_

trash: EVERYONE REPORT THE BIG WITCH SHES-TAKEN BY THE BIG WITCH
_

beck: how come everyone's tweets say "taken by the big witch" like are y'all in a relationship with her or something TAKEN BY THE BIG WITCH
_

Will: (image of big witch outside of window) WHY WOULD GOD MAKE THIS(Screenshot of Tweet from @twitter)

Twitter: 

Hey everyone,

We apologize for the inconveniences caused by The Big Witch. We did not realize she could take people and we will be deactivating the account.

In the meantime, we will be launching an investigation to find out what happened to the (giant green text) TAKEN BY THE BIGGER WITCH
629968
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 19/09/2023
i hate using new apps
A green login screen for an App called "Deffun"

At the top is the word "Deffun" which is above a generic looking app symbol (purple and blue circle)

Below the symbol is a tagline that says "Talk to the world"

Below the tagline are Sign Up and Login buttons

Below the buttons is small text that says

Terms of Service - Privacy Policy - Cookie Policy - Ads Info - More - ©Deffun 2004An app that looks like a green Twitter/Threads/Bsky. 
Next to the reply, share and heart buttons is an odd cylindrical symbol

new sonic: what does that fourth thing do

f9 for mage: man (attached to the post is a headline that says "Twitter headquarters on fire for 18 days in a row")

ben: what's your favorite memory of twitter

jon (replying to ben): never used it

star mario got (replying to ben): one time i posted a picture of my face and a garfield parody account replied that he no longer believed in God

new sonic: what does that fourth thing do (the cylindrical symbol is red and rising on new sonic's post)

1st gen pokemon: deffun was created before twitter?? (attached to the post is the first image, zoomed in on the 2004)

new sonic: i hate starting over on a new app. its like the first day at a new job where you don't know anyone or what that fourth thing does. what the fuck does it do (the odd symbol is rising to the point of touching the text)another screenshot of posts on Deffun

new sonic: WHAT DOES IT DO (the odd symbol is now growing out of the screen and looping back down, touching new sonic's avi)


1st gen pokemon: oh shit (attached to the post is an image of the wikipedia article for Deffun. It says "Deffun was created in 2004 by Dr. Nick Staler in an effort to perform an online ritual to summon an entity known as The Lengthy Surgeon

Users who signed up for Deffun unknowingly agreed to give up a portion of their souls to aid in the summoning. They were also entered into a lottery, in which the winner would be used as a vessel for The Lengthy Surgeon

The website was shut down after Staler was unable to hit the required goal of 100,000 users"

severed bot: wait the site needed 100,000 users? how many does it have now?

1st gen pokemon: 987,835,245

severed bot: ok

new sonic has an unreadable post as it is completely covered in the odd symbol.More posts on Deffun

Fox News: BREAKING: BIG OLE SURGEON CRAWLS OUT OF DEFFUN USER'S MOUTH (attached to the post is a headline that says "FIND A RELIGION AND PRAY TO A GOD BECAUSE IT IS NOT LOOKING GREAT")

jon: OH GOD IT CONSUMES. OH HOW IT CONSUMES. THIS CANNOT POSSIBLY GET ANY WORSE

NBC News: Elon Musk offers to buy Deffun for $45 Billion (attached to the post is a headline that says "Elon Musk: 'I'm gonna charge for vowels')
11752190
dustin Couch @dustinkcouch.bsky.social · 18/09/2023
Does the photo viewer work for any of you when reading the longer screenshots? For me it cuts off at the bottom and dims when I scroll up. I guess you could save the images before looking at them as a work around or give me sys admin privileges for a sec and let me take a swing at it (no experience)
8774