iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Don’t go outside, RFK Jr jerked off to roadkill in the chemtrails again.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

Well, Clavicular just got arrested for drugging and raping a kid.... Is anyone surprised?

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

Yellow Wendy's means nothing if they don't bring back the fries from the 1990s.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

I went back in time and threw Robert F. Kennedy Jr. in front of the bullet that killed his Dad. But it was DBZ rules so things still suck in this timeline.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

#LuigiMangione Luigi shouldn't have been in that skate park in Phoenix that day. He should have murdered Andrew Wakefield instead.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

BlueSky peaked after the 2024 election. Prove me wrong. Get me millions of followers and I will deliver slop like this. Also, The Middle East is now West Asia. I have spoken.

Jay and Silent Bob witness Kash Patel in a pasture next to some livestock. "Yo, this dude ain't one of us!"

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

That wasn't Mitch McConnell that was the final boss in the next Five Night's at Freddy's

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

I’m not the Angel of Death; I’m the Devil of Life.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

I’m always lurking, JD. I’m not the anti-Christ but I’m always lurking!

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

Why couldn't I just have been the Dr. Doom of the Middle East? Kingdom of Levanta? Turkey wants its empire back. Israel wants to make one. Iran wants one. Saudi wants one. But none shall have one. Only DOOM will have his empire. Jerusadoom. Doomascus. Istandoom! #MiddleEast is now West Asia.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 07/09/2026

Lunette walked so Miss Rachel could fly.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

People need to keep my cousin Abdul up in Michigan's name out THEIR damn mouths. It's my cousin Stifler in Michigan that's the real problem. Don't....don't let that man near positions of power. @abdulelsayed.bsky.social

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

Yo, JD Vance. You only said keep your wife’s ‘name’ out my mouth. I found the loophole and used it. 🖖🏼👅 That was supposed to say the shocker emoji but they don’t have one and my pinky has PTSD from high school lacrosse anyway.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

Our troops are not fucking toys for Bryson Kegsbreath's high fantasy holy war horseshit. The business of America was, is, and always will forever be...BUSINESS! Fuck the religious right! They are destroying the military and it is time for the REAL America to rise up and destroy them!

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

I AM backwards and poor. I am a fuckin bum. I do live in a trailer with my mom! I do got a dumb friend named Cheddar Bob whose data centers go obsolete as soon as the lights come on.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

My Secretary of War here; one hundred percent queer. He LOVES the cock!

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

The man put a makeup studio in the Pentagon so he could be pretty for war crimes and treasonous speeches. He's talking to the lion.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

Gay dudes: please give the nation permission to forever associate the f-slur in the American vernacular with the traitorous theocrat war criminal Pete Hegseth. It will cut him deep, like the closet he is in. Right next to the Christmas presents. Pete Hegseth LOVES THE COCK!

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 29/08/2026

Changing the batteries in the birds was cover for the Flock camera installations.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 23/08/2026

Just call me angelllll of the morniiiing aaaangel!

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 21/08/2026

Yo...I uh....found someone's trapper keeper. No contact info inside but I think it belongs to Mrs. Natalie Trump because that's written in several places on it. H/t @lincolnproject.us

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 08/08/2026

Uncle Mark and Aunt Claudia need to tell Cousin Donny to change his diapie

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 03/08/2026

I'll be glad when the anti-vax movement's "leaders" are dead. They won't be able to hurt innocent people anymore. Bioterrorist fucks deserve to die of measles. Yeah I said it.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 02/08/2026

We was butt naked all over the floor. It feld weird tho cuz we was at the Faygo store.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 14/07/2026

Great Recession nuked my hometown from orbit my first semester in college. Really all of Ohio tbh. I feel so bad knowing those kids born then are now entering adulthood. I wasn't around for the 80s. Did see the 90s. So maybe I saw half of peak America.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 12/07/2026

Lindsey Graham is dead, South Carolina is alive!

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 06/07/2026

"Ice Cream" "Now....Joe, this here was built out of a repurposed McFlurry machine, so the ice cream part is obviously broken"

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 29/06/2026

Half the magat profiles on Facebook are run by the same Bobs and Vagene guy calling you about your car's extended warranty.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 28/06/2026

"Hey...uh....you got any slits in here? heh heh...eeeeeeehehe" "Damn it, Beavis there's no slits in this pool. That fat orange guy lied. "AHHH. That guy with the Uncle Sam suit has his wiener out!" "Run Beavis!"

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 28/06/2026

I have multiple times seen a 5'6" brown guy with mid length black hair/beard walking around Dallas barefoot in light sand colored robes. Either I'm going crazy or I saw Jesus. Or the most dedicated cosplayer I've seen in years. Historically Accurate Messiah, now available at Spirit Halloween.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 28/06/2026

Netanyahu can rot in Israeli prison. They're not very nice. Get the fuck out of Lebanon. We'll restore friendly relations eventually, when Israel finds its Peter Magyar (new PM of Hungary) equivalent. Side note: If I were president we wouldn't be at war with Iran. I'd be fixing inflation.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 28/06/2026

Turkey'd roll in and we'd see if South Korean tanks they just bought are 20 yrs ahead of a Merkava. Israel prolly smaller than HOU Grand Pkwy, US/Turkey could seize it easier than Israel did Gaza. They need to know their role, shut their mouths, turn Ben-Gvir and Smotrich over for war crimes.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 28/06/2026

If I were President of the United States and Benjamin Netanyahu and Bin Salman treated me the way they treat Trump, I'd have woken up this morning, declared a no-fly zone over Lebanon and Israel, and DARED those motherfuckers to cross the boss. And if Israel shot at us, I'd trigger Article V and...

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 26/06/2026

Feel like I can say this being Arab but Dearbornistan can feast upon the fattest satchel of Richards for being more concerned with theocrats killing each other over there than theocrats that are an existential threat here.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 24/06/2026

Brendan Carr is OpusDeinly Partisan Jenkins....play the South Park episode again.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 24/06/2026

“Hurrr durr I voted for Trump because I wanna be able to say retatrudite again”

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 24/06/2026

“Hurrr durr I voted for Trump because I wanna be able to say retatrudite again”

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 23/06/2026

Mufti Al Husayni should have been at Nuremberg.

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Heineken Skywalker @devilofdallas.bsky.social · 20/06/2026

Go drinkin with a Scotsman, cuz u can't fuckin understand them - Robin Williams

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