iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 9h

The incredible thing is that Nicholson and Freeman are both still alive.

DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

Dynamite: Nobel, 1866. Basically nitroglycerine & clay. Triggered by fire, force, & electricity. Becomes unstable. Mainly mining. Usually red sticks. TNT: Häussermann, 1891 (was yellow dye, 1863). Triggered mainly by blasting cap. Very stable. Mainly warfare. Usually yellow blocks.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Feminize a band name: The Righteous Brassieres

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Trey Stokes @treystokes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

Feminize a band name: Cervix-a-Lot

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Know this: I don't care who you are. I will reserve judgment about you until I read the "Personal Life" section of your Wikipedia page.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

Gave up trying to replace the keyboard on my Asus laptop. I got about 20 screws out (back, battery, & motherboard) & got cold feet. Guess I'll be using a USB keyboard until I'm ready to replace the laptop.🤷‍♂️

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

Fake it till people point out you absolutely cannot and will not make it.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

Been working on some replacements for "rama lama ding dong". No advancement has been made in decades. - hunga dunga ling lang - lolly polly rang rung - sharka larka long dong

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

Anni-Frid looks different without makeup. I mean, I know she was a brunette, but... Also, I thought Benny was taller....

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

Can't we stop this thing where every news story post is just the same sentence four times??

"'Russian Houses' pose a threat" in the post, the image, the headline, and the lede.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

”If you can’t be with the one you love, love the one you’re with” is probably the second worst musical advice in history after “don’t fear the reaper”.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

The Soggy Bottom Boys have announced that they will no longer be opening for Ed Sheeran.

George Clooney & others as the Soggy Bottom Boys in Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?

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James, lunatic armed with some really funky stuff @reelcastortroy.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

The architect who designed the addition 50 years ago is still working and had the original drawings in his archive. Did this. And now we're planning a whole series.

Architectural composite showing a historic red-brick rowhouse beside a hand-drawn street-elevation plan. The photograph shows the three-story facade, tall black-trimmed windows, gray doors, sidewalk planters, and a mature street tree, while the drawing extends the elevation with dimensions, roofline, windows, downspout, and construction notes.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

It's wild that Hollywood has for years made happy claims of "no CGI" in stuff that clearly had a bunch of CGI bc they know audiences don't like CGI stunts & actors, but then they just pivoted to "And now we'll use AI all the time!", which is far worse.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

Humiliating #EveryDayCarry moment. Volunteer at the history center needed a screwdriver, so I leaped to the rescue with my 711L and 24 Wiha bits only to find she needed a hex driver to take apart a flat-pack desk, & I don't carry a single hex bit. 😔 Had to go to the car for my hex driver set.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

I’m very honored to announce that i have inherited the bulk of Dolly Parton’s wig collection. I will be wearing one in her honor each Halloween & on her birthday (Jan 19).

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 13/09/2026

Saw my sister’s childhood friend w her parents at the diner, & it reminded me: she was over when my grandparents were visiting, & grandpa asked her father’s name. When she answered, he said “Tob? As in Tobias?”, but she said, “Tob, as in Thobas,” because she had a bad cold. Cracks me up to this day.

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sheeven shpielberg 🏳️‍🌈 @sheev.calamitousintent.com · 13/09/2026

Make a band edible; fleetwood mac n cheese

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 10/09/2026

Victorinox should make a Swiss army "knife" that's just all screwdrivers. Phillips 2, Phillips 0, medium flat, & Torx 8 (common on knives & multitools). In place of the toothpick: eyeglass screwdriver. And etch the tweezers with inch & mm for checking the length of screws.

Third party micro screwdriver for Victorinox Swiss army knife toothpick slot.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 10/09/2026

We should just give in & call soccer "football" & American football "American football" & Canadian football "Canadian football" & rugby "rugby football" & baseball "baseball football" & golf "golf football".

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 08/09/2026

Know your German High Command ball situation.

Hitler has only got one ball. Goering has two but very small. Himmler is rather sim'lar. But poor old Goebbels has no balls at all.

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Aaron Reichlin-Melnick @reichlinmelnick.bsky.social · 01/09/2026

As somebody who grew up during the era in which there was a massive public push to reduce teen pregnancy, it’s absolutely wild to me to see people on Fox News now complaining that not enough teens are getting pregnant.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

Took lunch to my parents today, & my chatty stepmother didn't have anything new to say, so she just told me everything my sister told her when she visited.😶

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

Downgrade a movie The Englishman Who Went up a Hill & Came Down the Same Hill

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 29/08/2026

A fun game if you watch a lot of #everydaycarry videos is "spot the bandaid".

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 29/08/2026

I introduced a friend to Suno, the AI music site, & he's produced a bunch of hard rock political tirades, including setting Robert Shepherd’s "Glossary of Adjectives to Describe Trump" to speed rap metal. Wild. He's older than *I* am.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 29/08/2026

Weird that we don't have twelve 30-day months & an extra 5 holidays in spring (6 in leap years), during which we celebrate the top philanthropists of the previous year. Honorees would be decided by an international consortium that would be wildly corrupt.

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James Wright @jameswrights.bsky.social · 26/08/2026

RIP Tim Curry, never was a man so distinctly iconic and yet such a chameleon in a role🧡😢

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Garrett M. Graff @vermontgmg.bsky.social · 25/08/2026

One way you know Dolly Parton lived life the right way: I don’t think anyone’s going to get fired for accurately quoting Dolly Parton today.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 25/08/2026

One funny thing about Epstein is that he spent years carefully cultivating friendships/extortion with influential people to ensure he'd never have to answer for his crimes, & then they threw him in a cell & only made sure THEY'D never have to answer for THEIR crimes.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 25/08/2026

This will be my final tweet, bc i ran the 100 metre dash faster than Usain Bolt & then crashed into a wall and exploded into pieces. please honor my legacy

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 24/08/2026

Make a band bigger: Styx & Stones

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 23/08/2026

Someone needs to invent a foot switch that makes a video camera change between two focal points. That way, people can do demos where things sitting on the table are in focus one moment and things held up to the camera in the hand are in focus the next moment. Auto focus sucks.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 23/08/2026

Fun fact: "aux quatre coins" ("at the four corners") became "catercorner", which became "cattycorner", which itself became "kittycorner", because we are an unserious nation of boobs.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 22/08/2026

If you see this, we implore you to post a picture from whatever device you're using without explanation.

Still image from "The Dover Boys" cartoon.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 22/08/2026

Last night, I saw a YouTuber mention aphantasia, & it made me realize I can't visualize anything. Like, other people lie down to go to sleep & think about stuff & see actual images of that stuff?

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 21/08/2026

Here's a saying you don't see much anymore: "chief cook and bottle washer". Early 1800s references were often to actual ship's cooks & bottle washers, then applied to leaders who also do the real work.

Bangor (Maine) Commercial -- Apr 13, 1895

Frequency chart showing "cook and bottle washer" in newspapers being most popular in the 1950s but fading to obscurity in the 2000s.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 18/08/2026

#EDC seems to be a popular hobby, & yet I've never seen anyone carry one of those bulky packs of teeny tools. Your everyday carry is what you have one you. If it's in a bag in your car, it might as well be a full-size tool.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 17/08/2026

everyone stop talking about "nepo babies", you bunch of clowns

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 16/08/2026

Something I find insanely frustrating is the way Google Image Search shows results for Facebook, even tho links to those pages rarely actually have those images. Google has to know this, yet they do nothing.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 15/08/2026

Grew up with a kid name Charlie Hiester, & we never once called him Gnarly Kiester, because we were Gen X, so WE WERE GENTLEMEN.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 12/08/2026

Terrible day. Someone i was sure was lying was actually just disingenuous.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 11/08/2026

Imagine sitting on 11 crates with 1700 pounds of gold coins in them, earmarked for science. #Smithsonian

Funding of the Smithsonian Institution by James Smithson's donation of, in, 2026 dollars, $110 million worth of gold. At the time, it's buying power was about $15 million in 2026 dollars.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 09/08/2026

Finishing up my Paul Revere presentation.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 07/08/2026

This one time, I tried to make a PowerPoint presentation about all the genera of animals that would have to be on Noah's ark. I gave up at reptiles. Couldn't get into them past crocodilians. Seriously, who gives a shit about order Squamata? Not me, I can tell you that.

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DerekZarban @derekzarban.bsky.social · 06/08/2026

Hank Green being attacked by knitters and AI haters at the same time is hilarious.

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