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Loren Galloway Bowans

@dearloren.bsky.social
286 followers 215 following 2.5K posts

Gulf Coastal elitist 📍 Home with the armadillo 🔗 bit.ly/4qnQO7M

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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 4h
Also, don't comment on how big portions are at a restaurant. Things like, "Oh my god, this is so much food!" It implies that if I finish everything on my plate, I've eaten too much.
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 4h
Listen to Maintenance Phase 😏
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 21h
If I can't have happiness, I'll take schadenfreude
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 21h
BLUE KENTUCKY MOON KEEP ON SHINING
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Reposted by Loren Galloway Bowans
"fart" @jonhendren.com · 27/02/2025
mike ditka used to have a branded resort in kissimmee florida and there were lots of staged photos of mike ditka hanging out in it. i will post a bunch of them now. sorry for hte low resolution these are from like 2008
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
Earlier, I was trying to tell my husband that I thought a show's casting was good, but instead what my brain and mouth came up with was, "The actresses are nice."
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Reposted by Loren Galloway Bowans
Marie Le Conte @youngvulgarian.marieleconte.com · 07/10/2026
walks around with a big coat and no underwear
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
If they're looking for some who makes incomprehensible pitching decisions and can't win in the postseason, maybe they should call Joe Espada
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
ACL turning Zilker Park into a giant, smelly mud pit really is quite the allegory
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
I still think about this all the time
culinary students be like i got spaghetti due at 11:50
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
Atlanta may end up winning the game, but goddamn did New Orleans win halftime
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Reposted by Loren Galloway Bowans
Amanda Mull @amandamull.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
Briefly thought that was Pat McAfee singing, sorry to this man
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
Why is Eric Church involved in this lol
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
If laughing at an AI video of violence against a woman normalizes violence against women in general, then what the fuck does it do when Al Michaels and Kirk Herbstreit are in national television whitewashing Watson's sexual misconduct against over two dozen women?
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
If you're outraged about what a 22 year old who makes $2.5 million said at a Monday media availability, should you not be even more outraged about what an 81 year old who makes $15 million said on Thursday Night Football?
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Watson's accusers are massage therapists with little to no power and are almost entirely women of color. Al Michaels has quite a bit of power and influence, though. Is that the difference?
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Every sports person I follow was outraged about Arch Manning laughing at a fake video of a powerful white woman being slapped. Still haven't really heard anything from that set about Al Michaels saying that "winning is the best deodorant" for Deshaun Watson committing multiple sexual assaults.
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Never could look at Kershaw the same after that racist screed at the Laugh Factory
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
My dad thought—and still thinks!—that this was so, so funny. He laughed and laughed. So if you ever wonder why I'm like this... that's why.
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
I loved Barney, and I was very excited and talking back to him, but then all the sudden my dad went, "I'll get you my pretty! And your little dog, too!" in the Wicked Witch voice. He said all he heard from the other room was a scream, the monitor clunking onto the floor, and little feet running.
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Fun story: When I was about three years old, I liked to go into my parents' room and play pretend with the receiving end of the baby monitor like it was a phone. So one day, my dad went into my room and got the input end and started talking through the baby monitor like he was Barney the Dinosaur.
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Plus the pelts make such beautiful stoles
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Before I look it up, how bad is it on a scale of one to Kevin Ware?
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
JJ Watt saying "Spags" over and over gives me the ick
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Also, sorry, are they saying that people in El Paso are working in mines? Is that a euphemism for going to UTEP? Because I'm pretty sure the tin mines closed like a hundred years ago
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
I know that mining is still a job that exists, but "Facebook saved me from the mines" has to be an all-time dumb commercial
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
I'm not a Texans fan, but I do need them to start winning because I don't want DeMeco to get fired. It's a point of pride for me that my hometown team has the NFL's hottest head coach.
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Our friend is a Giants fan and took his son to this game for his 7th birthday. It was his kid's first ever NFL game. Gonna be pretty friggin' memorable.
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Aaaand back to the defense not being able to get a stop
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Sublime
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
OR THROW IT TO MY SON THAT WORKS TOO
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Please, for the love of God, run the ball
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Once again requesting that the Bills defense MAKE A GODDAMN TACKLE
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
It's cute when Josh does it
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
I HAVE ALWAYS BELIEVED IN KEON
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Reposted by Loren Galloway Bowans
CJ Fogler @cjzero.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
some guys should just not try to hurdle
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
They look sooooo slooooow
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Dion wtf
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
"When missing posters go up, Ken Paxton takes them down" just sounds like Ken Paxton is trying to prevent children from being found by tearing down missing posters
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Yeah, like that
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Can we start playing defense yet or
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Rooting for the Texans today, so they will of course be losing this game. Apologies in advance.
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
It's the black pants
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Volume up to hear the weirdest thing I've ever heard Gus Johnson say, even by Gus Johnson standards
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
We have not discussed this enough
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
CC watching the game from the hospital with the kids 🥹
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Me when the Pope is rooting for the White Sox
Tweet from "Spectro" that says, "Pope, would you please shut the fuck up"
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
2026 Michigan Humiliation Tour
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Loren Galloway Bowans @dearloren.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Chanting "who hates Iowa, we hate Iowa" when you're playing Michigan is absolute loser shit
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