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Dan Wootton

@danwootton.bsky.social
432 followers 335 following 82 posts

NOT Martin Branning. (Parody)

PostsRepliesMedia
Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 04/02/2025
I'll have some of whatever Crafty's smoking! 😂
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Nigel Farage @nigelfarage.bsky.social · 04/02/2025
For once, Sir Keir Starmer is 100% correct. Thumbing his nose at the EU's constant attempts to "repair relations" is the only way forward. Let's not forget that Labour's most successful Prime Minister to date owes his entire legacy to playing lapdog to a cookie American President...
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 04/02/2025
Meghan was replaced with a simulant years ago.
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Becky Aizen @beckyaizen.bsky.social · 03/02/2025
It’s pretty worrying when mainstream commentators enter the conspiracy space. I mean, ‘fake pregnancies’?! What’s next, @danwootton.bsky.social? Meghan had an affair with JFK & RFK, then shot Jack Ruby from a grassy knoll while faking the moon landing? The world is full of dreck. Don’t add to it.
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Nigel Farage @nigelfarage.bsky.social · 30/01/2025
Mister Trump has just shared with me the architectural drawings for his planned, new, 30,000 bed "migrant hotel" facility in Guantanamo Bay. The British Government, indeed the world, could learn a lot here...
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 30/01/2025
Ten goose steps! 😂
media.tenor.com
a man in a suit and tie is playing drums .
ALT: a man in a suit and tie is playing drums .
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 24/01/2025
Any chance you could text me his number, Nige? I have a little assignment he might be interested in...
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courtland1.bsky.social @courtland1.bsky.social · 24/01/2025
@nigelfarage.bsky.social Are you going to start a riot about his sentence?
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Nigel Farage @nigelfarage.bsky.social · 20/01/2025
Every April, these British Isles are invaded by hundreds of thousands of undocumented migrants from Europe and West Africa. They come here for the sole purpose of having babies and engage in the illegal fishing of our waters. www.bbc.com/news/article...
bbc.com
Sandeel: Brexit fishing row heads for trade court showdown
The UK has banned European vessels from catching the silvery fish species in its North Sea waters but the EU is challenging the move.
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 20/01/2025
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Nigel Farage @nigelfarage.bsky.social · 09/01/2025
Throwback to when we used to play "Hitler Youth" at Dulwich College... Fun times!
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 09/01/2025
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 30/12/2024
You know there's been more than three Presidents, right?
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Darren Grimes @darrengrimes.bsky.social · 30/12/2024
Just heard the sad news... RIP Jimmy Carr. 🥺
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Nigel Farage @nigelfarage.bsky.social · 29/12/2024
Immigrants are the backbone of America. They are what made this country great and we will need many more of them if we are to make it great again.
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vinylbuff.bsky.social @vinylbuff.bsky.social · 29/12/2024
@danwootton.bsky.social
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 28/12/2024
You're thinking about it the wrong way around, boy...
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Darren Grimes @darrengrimes.bsky.social · 28/12/2024
Another £27 BILLION saved, thanks to Brexit! Is there any space left in the piggy bank? bsky.app/profile/the-...
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 26/12/2024
Did he just? 😲
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Nigel Farage @nigelfarage.bsky.social · 26/12/2024
Ho! Ho! Ho! 🎄DONATE NOW!🎄 ...and I'll let him go. Unharmed. www.justtaking.com/DonateToNigel
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Darren Grimes @darrengrimes.bsky.social · 17/12/2024
Another day, another EV bursts uncontrollably into flames. 🙄 The environmental lobby have completely normalised these death devices. Why does Sir Keir of Starmer refuse to take action and ban these things? www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/c4...
bbc.co.uk
Igor Kirillov: Russian general in charge of nuclear protection forces killed in Moscow explosion
Lt Gen Igor Kirillov was charged yesterday in Ukraine for the use of chemical weapons, and was sanctioned by the UK in October.
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 17/12/2024
Shit, no way! 😭 Bloody EVs.
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 17/12/2024
Who?
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 11/12/2024
We are! 😂
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 08/12/2024
My name is Penis Balls!
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Nigel Farage @nigelfarage.bsky.social · 08/12/2024
🔆 NEW MERCH DROP! 🔆 Fancy seeing my gob, grinning up from your growler? Enjoy a pint with the lads in Chucky Arlah's... HURRY NOW - STRICTLY LIMITED AVAILABILITY WHEN THEY'RE GONE THEY'RE GONE! (Please allow 28 days after ordering for your merch to be printed.)
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 04/12/2024
Bloody hell Nige, mate!
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Nigel Farage @nigelfarage.bsky.social · 04/12/2024
Pronouns: Apache Attack Helicopter Height: 6'2⅞" Shoe: Faux leather Union Jack print Zodiac: Pises Smoke: Superkings Tattoos: 0 Piercings: 1 Fave drink: Milkshake
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 04/12/2024
It's not actually my birthday.
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 04/12/2024
Go Wootsie, go Wootsie, it's your birthday, it's your birthday!
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Darren Grimes @darrengrimes.bsky.social · 04/12/2024
If I understand correctly, another way of saying this is that 76% of people in the UK are rich. Sounds pretty good when you put it like that!
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 03/12/2024
TRIGGERED! 🤣
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Darren Grimes @darrengrimes.bsky.social · 03/12/2024
I fail to see the issue here. Why the hell do we insist on importing all these foreign Christmas traditions anyway? The Britain I love does not eat turkey or mince pies on Christmas! We eat goose and little sweet pies made out of raisins and stuff all mashed up. Delicious!
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Nigel Farage @nigelfarage.bsky.social · 02/12/2024
Remind me again what else the NHS need from us in order to just do their jobs? #ungrateful
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 02/12/2024
There, there... 😂
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 28/11/2024
Knows it. 👊
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Nigel Farage @nigelfarage.bsky.social · 28/11/2024
🇬🇧 24 HOURS TO SAVE BRITAIN 🇬🇧 Sign the petition NOW and enter your credit card details to remove 2-Tier Keir from Office. BUT HURRY! YOUR COUNTRY NEEDS YOU. www.justgiving.com/donatetonige
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Nigel Farage @nigelfarage.bsky.social · 23/11/2024
⚠️ CITIZENS OF CLAPTON ⚠️ The security services have finally seen fit to allow you to meet me. My surgery is now OPEN! ✅️ [Opening hours: Wed 15:00-15:30]
A very obviously AI generated image of Farage smoking a fag in an absolute pig sty of a constituency office with overflowing ashtrays and empty beer cans everywhere.
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 23/11/2024
Just a thought - which one's the constituency office in?
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 23/11/2024
Call me.
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Darren Grimes @darrengrimes.bsky.social · 25/12/2023
That's it! The woke have gone too far this time... How exactly am I supposed to make my manger scene stained glass window decoration with these? For years that has been me mam's favourite thing about Christmas and these Godless ghouls have ruined it! It's a Christmas WAR!
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 25/12/2023
That's what we did back home. Works a treat.
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 15/12/2023
Bliss+
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 15/12/2023
You knows it... 😉
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Nigel Farage @nigelfarage.bsky.social · 15/12/2023
See? How can I be a "racist"? Or doesn't that fit their narrative?
Renowned racist, Nigel Farage, with one of his best friends who is black.
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 15/12/2023
That reminds me! @Lozza got a job for you mate. Video that needs narrating. Half a day, £500.
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 14/12/2023
Cheap af 👊
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Darren Grimes @darrengrimes.bsky.social · 14/12/2023
I've been doing some research into Rwanda and sorry, but I don't see the problem. Rwanda is the most technically advanced nation on Earth. Birnin Zana, the largest smart-city sounds like heaven - hanging gardens, mag-lev trains, free shuttle buses. Honestly. Sign me up to this veritable paradise!
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Dan Wootton @danwootton.bsky.social · 13/12/2023
He's got cotton... 😂
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