iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 13/06/2026

@reckless.bsky.social New Decoder question: If the A.I. you created is conscious, is it ethical to force your newborn to murder people at the behest of the United States government?

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 02/05/2026

My gaming PC blew up in 2019. The last console I bought was the PS2. I have never played a Pokémon game. Nevertheless, I acquired a Switch 2 and Pokopia. The world is tearing itself apart and I’m building houses to make pocket monsters happy.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 04/04/2026

A friend accidentally stopped his car on top of my foot last night. I’m a little sore but otherwise unharmed. Hm, that gives me an idea… [instantly dies because he’s not Bruce Willis in UNBREAKABLE, he’s in a shitty knockoff called UNPARKABLE]

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 11/03/2026

The male loneliness epidemic but, like, NOT in a way that makes it anyone else’s problem.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 09/03/2026

“The depths of human creativity and depravity are two sides of the same coin.” – @vicmsong.bsky.social talking Furby

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 02/03/2026

Played a game of Dishwasher Operation* and lost. * Try to snake your arm around the screaming hot heating element of a just-run dishwasher to pick up a fallen fork

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 02/03/2026

Me whenever I’m doing endless repetitive shit with an X-acto blade: I wish I had a Cricut. Me whenever I’m shopping for a Cricut: I would sooner stick an X-acto blade in my neck than buy a DRM-encumbered online-only paper cutter.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 25/02/2026

Furious at Hayao Miyazaki for not actually telling me How Do You Live. I need answers.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 17/02/2026

THE AGE OF BOBOT IS UPON US (consensually)

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 15/02/2026

Girl, that Valentine’s Day post on Instagram is somewhat undermined by the 364 days per year you post on not-Instagram about the ways your boyfriend makes you sad.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 13/02/2026

My brain has a unique talent for turning even the nicest dream into horror. Romantic meetcute → impulsive flight to far-off lands → plane upside-down screaming crying death.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 04/02/2026

If we can just pinpoint the superyacht’s location, maybe we can lure those yacht-sinking whales near it and…

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 26/01/2026

Being mid-life while the world is in crisis DOESN’T make this a mid-life crisis.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 22/01/2026

I just watched “Jim Henson: Idea Man” and (between sobs) was further impressed that Eliza has worked with The Jim Henson Company on multiple projects! 🐌

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 04/01/2026

Rewatching the “Live at The 10 Spot” Radiohead concert broadcast on MTV the year I graduated high school. The Paramount vultures, having scraped any remaining meat from MTV’s bones, will soon discard it altogether. Feeling rather picked over myself, to be honest. radiohead.com/library/#okc...

radiohead.com

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 29/12/2025

Hello, Reed Diffuser Company tech support? How do I turn down the volume on this thing? It has 50% too much smell.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 27/12/2025

I’ve discovered the secret to infinite free money: Switch wireless plans so your bill goes from $115/mo to $30/mo. You can then use “But I’m saving $85 every month!” to justify literally any stupid purchase…forever!

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 16/11/2025

Every time I open Bluesky to post something, I say to myself “It would be better if you were telling this to a therapist” and, duly chastised, I close the app.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 26/10/2025

Between @pftompkins.bsky.social’s statements and that hitchhiking robot being destroyed within minutes of arriving, Philadelphia has always been on the right side of the AI debate.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 20/10/2025

Making it my life’s mission to complete the YFI 69.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 15/10/2025

What they fail to mention on the product page for these sustainable compostable bamboo toothbrushes is that they’re so enormous it’s like trying to brush your teeth with a fucking broom handle. Anyways I recently picked up a new hobby, whittling.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 01/10/2025

Still kinda pissed at the Honors English teacher who shamed me for (correctly) using the word “conflagration”.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 16/09/2025

@siracusa.social I was so tired of Red Dot Syndrome that I created a Shortcut to launch Settings and gave it a transparent PNG of the Settings icon. I imagine the janky animation would bother you as much as the badge itself, but I’m willing to tolerate it.

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Reposted by Dan Engler

Dave Shumka @daveshumka.bsky.social · 31/08/2025

Hot take: I don't think you should be allowed to use the self-checkout if you're a dumbshit.

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Reposted by Dan Engler

Avery Trufelman @trufelman.bsky.social · 29/08/2025

Trans rights are fundamentally threatened. My friends' abilities to travel, to get healthcare, to exist in peace are all under attack. I am so upset about this. But, as a cis ally, why am I so nervous to talk about it? Why am I afraid to appear performative? This is required listening

open.spotify.com

Spotify – Web Player

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 27/08/2025

@connorratliff.bsky.social A special birthday message for an auspicious occasion!

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 25/08/2025

It’s been so long since I last smacked myself in the balls with anything that, as the detached vacuum cleaner hose careened toward me, I could only think www.youtube.com/watch?v=wKbU...

youtube.com

I Can't Believe You've Done This

YouTube video by PWee28

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 17/08/2025

I was shamefully unaware of @demilardner.bsky.social’s work until this week, but “So You Wanna Win A P*nis Pump 2” rivals @chrisgethard.bsky.social’s “One Man’s Trash” for the title of Best 43 Minutes of Comedy You Will Ever Watch. m.youtube.com/watch?v=h7Ef...

m.youtube.com

So you wanna win a p*nis pump 2 (W Libby Watson and Jesse Clarke

YouTube video by demi lardner

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Reposted by Dan Engler

Heather Anne Campbell @heathercampbell.bsky.social · 16/08/2025

last night — in what has to be the dumbest dream I’ve ever had — my wife and I were crying because it was announced that Mario was dead

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 06/08/2025

How to detect AI-generated writing: It frequently contains em dashes. How to detect that I’m fucking old: I use periods in text messages and social media posts.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 06/08/2025

For the first time in three months, it is (very lightly) raining in Seattle. #BLESSED

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 02/08/2025

Lying in bed and feel a tickle on neck behind my right ear. Swat it away, assuming it’s either my bedsheets or my imagination. Quarter-sized spider. In my home. In my bedroom, where I sleep. This is a declaration of war.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 14/07/2025

Woke up to find a shard of clear glass embedded in my heel. No clue where it came from, how I stepped on it while unconscious, or how I managed to avoid bleeding everywhere. Suddenly concerned about what I’ve been doing in my sleep.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 08/07/2025

@hgmodernism.bsky.social Listening to an episode of the Unexplainable podcast about your two favorite things: plants and consuming mass quantities of something to make yourself immune to it! “Should you be eating poison oak?” from last September. podcasts.voxmedia.com/show/unexpla...

podcasts.voxmedia.com

Vox Media: Podcast Network | Unexplainable

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 04/07/2025

Spent my first 20-odd years as a devout Catholic and the biblical verse lodged in my mind is “Whatsoever you do to the least of my people, that you do unto me.” The poor. The hungry. Seeking asylum. Fleeing death. Children of Gaza. Thrown to the wolves by rich old men in a fucking prayer circle.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 14/06/2025

This week, I started taking a mid-day break to go up to my building’s rooftop patio and spend some time away from the horrors of the world. Today there was some weirdo up there in a speedo. Nothing good lasts.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 04/06/2025

A first for me: Unsubscribing from a podcast I enjoy because they started taking money to inject an episode of a different unrelated podcast into their feed each week. An hour-long ad I’m compelled to download and then delete? NOPE.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 03/06/2025

It is once again @elizaskinner.bsky.social pasta day! ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ www.bbc.co.uk/food/recipes...

Screencap of a tweet by user @DanEngler on April 20, 2021. It reads “This beetroot pasta is so good that I should be Venmo-ing @elizaskinner every time I make it to thank her for suggesting the recipe.”

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 08/05/2025

No Pope Pizzaball? NOT INTERESTED. en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pierbat...

en.m.wikipedia.org

Pierbattista Pizzaballa - Wikipedia

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 28/04/2025

Anyone who says they understand what’s happening and can tell you the right thing to do is full of shit. They are lying to you because they want your money.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 24/04/2025

What’s the emoji for “trying very hard to not have a panic attack”? Gotta be this one, right?

The “shaking face” emoji, a blurry cartoon face with an expression of shock and motion lines on either side.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 22/04/2025

An Oral History of the R.E.M. “Everybody Hurts” Video and the Top 300 Parodies Broadcast on American Television

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Reposted by Dan Engler

Paul F. Tompkins @pftompkins.bsky.social · 21/04/2025

[Pushes cowboy hat back, spits tobacco juice, squints into the distance] Well son looks like we got ourselves a conclave

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 20/04/2025

Thinking about the time a girl invited me to her place to watch a movie and the movie she chose was SCHINDLER’S LIST.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 19/04/2025

For the first time ever, I sought out the original Blur, Beyoncé, Bob Marley, and Lauryn Hill tracks used to assemble this 20-year-old mashup, and they’re all so radically different that I can’t imagine the vision needed to combine them. youtube.com/watch?v=ymYH...

youtube.com

Blur - No Blur No Cry (Loo and Placido)

YouTube video by Blur Archive Project

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 15/04/2025

It’s been over 36 hours and the IRS still hasn’t withdrawn my scheduled tax payment. Things must be DEEPLY fucked if the oligarchs can’t even manage to bleed the workers on time.

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Dan Engler @danengler.bsky.social · 09/04/2025

If anyone tells you non-alcoholic Guinness tastes just like the original, fill their mouth with mud. It has zero body, like Guinness-flavored LaCroix. Rank.

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