Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 30/09/2026Dying from autoerotic asphyxiation while Johnny Cash's voice singing WAP plays loudly from pulsating speakers on my Ikea desk. My most ambitious vision has been realized at last. 020
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 28/09/2026A little different but a while back I saw a post from a popular streamer/model who was earnestly saying something like, "Why is it so hard to find a high-energy guy who loves partying at bars, video games, country music, and fake tits, who also loves and respects women??" 051
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 22/09/2026Random day off work could not possibly be better timed. Gimme da Crone!!! 010
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 16/09/2026You come to two doors protected by two guards. Behind one door is treasure beyond imagination; behind the other, certain death. You know that one guard always lies, and the other guard always sends you an URGENT email saying that we are going to LOSE if you don't contribute just FIVE dollars TODAY 000
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 16/09/2026Staying in a hotel for a conference this week and I'm way up on the top floor of a big hotel. Needless to say I am standing in front of the big open window hanging dong. 010
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 07/09/2026The foundation of MAHA is a narcissistic desire to feel special: more educated, more caring, more independent than you. It is not genuine concern for health or knowledge. It is vanity. 042
Reposted by Wizard MortySpencer Ackerman @attackerman.bsky.social · 18/08/2026ICE and CBP are full of rapists and child predators. A new report details it in horrific detail.forever-wars.comThe Sex Criminals and Child Abusers of ICE and CBPRape. Domestic violence. Epstein friendship. It's all tolerated by our valiant homeland-security apparatus. PLUS: COINTELPRO 2026 9243462038
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 07/08/2026As long as we're talking about men reading on here, shout-out to @keithrosson.bsky.social for helping me restart my reading habit this summer. Picked up Smoke City on an impulse and have been reading every day since. Halfway through Coffin Moon now and just pre-ordered Crone. He's great! 040
Reposted by Wizard Mortymtsw @mtsw.bsky.social · 29/07/2026All the Fauci stuff is a modern day version of the POW/MIA stuff after Vietnam - a way to try to rewrite the history of a huge failure of conservative ideology to be instead a story about how liberals and foreigners stabbed us in the back. 5553941357
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 29/07/2026The White Thumb Rises: A Microsoft Teams horror story 000
Reposted by Wizard MortyA Blog of Their Own @blogoftheirown.bsky.social · 23/07/2026The Dodgers who went to the White House should receive every bit as much judgment and condemnation as the Giants pitchers who Sharpied the Pride hats. ICE spent their World Series-winning season terrorizing their city. Fuck them for doing photo ops with fascists instead of standing with their fans. 6739168
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 23/07/2026This is pretty revealing about how little thought people tend to give future regrets. If I take the chance at $1M and lose out on $50k, that's about the same as missing out on any moderately successful investment opportunity. If I take the $50k and never know whether I would have won $1M...mannn. 000
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 22/07/2026Just read a Salon piece about how Obsession, a movie about a man forcing a woman to dissociate from her real personality to center him at the expense of everything else, which inevitably has terrible consequences, has nothing to say about the current moment. It was uhhh not written by a woman. 020
Reposted by Wizard MortyPaul Byrne @theplanetaryguy.com · 21/07/2026The U.S. Secretary of Defense just stated that—so far—the war with Iran has cost $37.5 billion dollars. That's since February. That same amount is how much the United States spent on planetary science from FY2013 through FY2026 inclusive. Thirteen years of planetary science or five months of war. 16936021418
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 21/07/2026People have allowed themselves to become so enveloped in consumerism that buying things has, itself, started to feel like a job, and people don't love anything as much as they love bitching about their job all day long 000
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 19/07/2026One thing we could do to reduce violence in this country is send anyone who wears a baseball cap with a brim like this to an isolated island to kill and eat each other 010
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 17/07/2026Corina Knoll at the NYT wants us to know that fascists are actually pretty nice people if you ignore the fascism, which is really just a passionate belief in free speech if you think about it share.google/6ayZslkSdJvi...share.googleThe Army Veteran Killed Outside His ‘Trump House’Kerry Sheron could often be found waving and nodding to those who passed his home, which stood out in Escondido, Calif. 000
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 16/07/2026Annnd on the mound tonight for the Brew Crew is the right-handed rookie, Norbert Quesadilla 000
Reposted by Wizard MortyStan Oklobdzija @stano.bsky.social · 14/07/2026California is debating legislation right now that would ban all ICE employees from ever being hired by a public agency for life. This is good and next year's Democratic House needs to provide a full roster of ICE employees to help facilitate state efforts like this one. 343816874
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 14/07/2026I will say again that any Dem running on a tax-the-rich platform with the slogan "Make them pay" will have stronger grassroots support than they could possibly imagine 040
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 08/07/2026Flirting when you're married just means saying "hi" to each other over and over in various bashful ways 000
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 04/07/2026I'm the direct descendant of a Danish immigrant, a first-wave feminist, a Korean aristocrat who married an Indiana farm boy after the war, and a bunch of religious fundamentalists and con-men. I'm as American as they come, I think that's cool, and I want to keep making this country better 🫡 000
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 02/07/2026Sometimes when I hear Radiohead's Creep I imagine it's Judas right before deciding to betray Jesus 000
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 01/07/2026Recently started watching Renegade and got a little disoriented hearing a narrative description of the show's premise over the theme song, then immediately seeing the same narrative fully play out in the pilot episode. 010
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 22/06/2026Drinking beers with the boys when suddenly my night turns sour due to my insistence that anyone who thinks "pretzel shape" is the best shape for a pretzel is a useless shit-lib who will inevitably swing from the gallows 000
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 14/06/2026The celebration when It Happens is going to rip open a wormhole straight into a heavenly spa where the angels bathe 011
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 12/06/2026Enough about doomscrolling, if you're not having fun on your phone that's a skill issue. I'm amuse-pilled and laughmaxxing on here bro. Straight up smilescrolling. 011
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 01/06/2026If you've ever talked with an AI bot and found it difficult to remember that it's just a computer, please just stay at home and watch your little shows or whatever. No one needs you trying to impact the world. You can just chill. 000
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 28/05/2026One of the dangers of being involved in revenge campaigns such as this one is that it sends a loud signal to others that if/when they punish you, the punishment needs to be final. 000
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 27/05/2026Would somebody please ask these lard brained nitwits if they think God has a penis and what they think it looks like 000
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 26/05/2026Funniest movie moment of 2026, everyone else can give up 000
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 20/05/2026Something missing from peasant discourse is that in peasant times everyone knew who you were and what you were like. If the local miller didn't like you, you couldn't just keep buying flour at a fair regulated price. And obviously if you piss off the witch of the creek you're fucked. 000
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 15/05/2026Debuting my new conspiracy theory about how mobile game ads that show people fucking up extremely simple tasks are giving everyone a severely degraded impression of how smart they should be 020
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 13/05/2026All my holy homies are surviving on locusts and honey (Matthew 3:4), boiling their sons (2 Kings 6:29), and scarfing down words (Jeremiah 15:16) 000
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 11/05/2026A pretty obvious one here is "Being a good person requires nothing of me beyond believing that I am a good person" 012029
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 11/05/2026Oh brother, brother I am telling you it just makes sense. 000
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 07/05/2026Basically I think what's happening in the Republican party right now is they're in the "fastening the belt" stage of when a guy accidentally strangles himself while jacking off to CSAM while his wife and kids are out of town 000
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 01/05/2026Wow, I mean...it makes sense. It just makes so much SENSE. 000
Wizard Morty @cyberleaf.bsky.social · 30/04/2026Heard Fortunate Son today and started wondering if there are any other wars besides Vietnam that have a theme song 000
