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Cory Ottenwess

@coryottenwess.com
326 followers 902 following 1.6K posts

Former designer. Future biology teacher. Current work in progress. Autistic, atheist, wobbly-sympathizing, Trotskyist adjacent. I read too much sci-fi and think about it too hard. Diabetes dad. Solo gamer. I cook, therefore I am.

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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 9h
What in the fuck.. they made Charlie and the Chocolate factory into a FUCKING REALITY TV show?!
static.klipy.com
Willy Wonka: The Suspense Is Terrible!
ALT: Willy Wonka: The Suspense Is Terrible!
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 10h
You know, it’s REALLY hard to believe this wasn’t A.I. at this point.
youtu.be
Australian twins speak in unison during interview about alleged crime
YouTube video by Associated Press
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 27/09/2026
Children deserve better role models than garbage YouTubers. It’s sad to hear who this 8yo looks up to
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 26/09/2026
Well said.
static.klipy.com
Golf Clap
ALT: Golf Clap
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 26/09/2026
Do your cats watch you intently while you’re changing their litter? Do you think they are concerned that you are stealing their poops?
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 22/09/2026
diesel shortages are going to drive up costs for items, i'm sure the delays/missing stock are due to cost issues.
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 22/09/2026
@theonion.com can i get the vintage onions if i'm studying to be a teacher? :D
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 19/09/2026
I have to be honest.. I don’t know how many Jasons are on Dark Matter..
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 16/09/2026
Maybe they just overcooked the McConnell clone?
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 13/09/2026
Ok, I think we need to step up our efforts to broadcast cat videos into space. That’s probably best that aliens think cats rule this planet
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 12/09/2026
My wife wants to listen to it now, so I get a re-listen!
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 11/09/2026
the new bobiverse book is out. The Infinite Extent, and it is only 8 hours 22 minutes of audiobook. THATS IT?! thats all i get? i need at least 18 hours of bob!
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 29/08/2026
the food isn't safe, and now the medicine isn't safe either. we are not going to make it, are we?
usatoday.com
Healthcare company recalls multiple injectables. See affected drugs
Injecting the potentially contaminated drugs could cause blood clots, organ damage and other health issues, according to the FDA.
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 29/08/2026
These are the days that should have holidays
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 29/08/2026
Public schools are way too underfunded to pay for crayons, let alone surgical procedures
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 29/08/2026
Huh, I would have expected Xfinity
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 29/08/2026
Way to make us look bad.. Canada.
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 29/08/2026
So.. piracy?
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 27/08/2026
There are currently 6 cars idling in the target parking garage. No one gives a fuck about toxic car exhaust do they?
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 26/08/2026
is there a reason they feel this is a threat? seems more like a statement about accountability.
dailymail.com
Disturbing guillotine discovered in pickup truck outside SCOTUS
The 18th century instrument used for beheadings was found just feet away from the Supreme Court and within a stone's throw from the US Capitol.
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 25/08/2026
Yep. Everything is more expensive. Capitalism wants everything you have left.
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 25/08/2026
Watching a movie on Pluto.tv is exposing me to the worst commercials humanity has to offer. I’ll never do this again.
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 23/08/2026
Wife is out for the night. That means, scotch, pizza rolls, and sci-fi movies :)
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 23/08/2026
i want a sequel to Flight of the Navigator. A different ship can crash on Earth, on a recovery mission to collect the now multiplying puckmaren is to be re-introduced to its home planet. the ship needs to find the adult david to regain the map data.. maybe?
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 14/08/2026
Why do I feel like these Hemsworth Abu Dhabi ads feel so cold and lifeless
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 13/08/2026
This seems like the corporations are just being let off the leash
nytimes.com
Trump Gives Green Light to U.S. Companies to Aim Hacks at Cybercriminals (Gift Article)
The practice would align the United States more closely with countries like China and Russia, where spy agencies have long relied on private-sector hackers to help with national security missions.
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 12/08/2026
eating a salad shouldn't feel like playing roulette
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 12/08/2026
so, we no longer get any info on who owns our corporate overlords. international interests are no longer required to report ownership, but americans are; so they can keep an eye on us.
fincen.gov
FinCEN.gov
Today, the U.S. Department of the Treasury’s Financial Crimes Enforcement Network (FinCEN) is issuing a final rule that permanently removes the requirement for U.S. companies and U.S. persons to repor...
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 11/08/2026
:O i found a study that explains why my autism became more apparent in my 30s/40s. thanks for that.
pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov
“Having All of Your Internal Resources Exhausted Beyond Measure and Being Left with No Clean-Up Crew”: Defining Autistic Burnout
Background: Although autistic adults often discuss experiencing “autistic burnout” and attribute serious negative outcomes to it, the concept is almost completely absent from the academic and clinical...
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 11/08/2026
Insulting: paying additional subscription fee for 4K video. Added insult? The ads they insert are full 4K. So it’s just a limitation not a technicality
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 08/08/2026
i went down a rabbit hole reading about HG Wells and his eugenics beliefs, and then went on to find that he wrote The Rights of Man, which went on to be an influential text on the United Nations Declaration of Human Rights in 1948. full fucking circle man. wow.
bookshop.org
The Rights of Man
H. G. Wells's passionate and influential manifesto--never before available in the United States--was first published in England in 1940 in response to World War II. The progressive ideas Wells set out...
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 06/08/2026
Every service promising to save you money is begging you to link other services to it, or to enroll in other subscriptions further defining the profile they have constructed of you. There is a digital version of you out there.
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 04/08/2026
fingers crossed. application and transcripts submitted for my substitute teaching license.
static.klipy.com
Key & Peele: Substitute Teacher 'I Got My Eye On You'
ALT: Key & Peele: Substitute Teacher 'I Got My Eye On You'
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 03/08/2026
Well.. shit.. explosively
wired.com
Taylor Farms Spent Big on MAGA and Anti-Regulatory Lobbying Before Diarrhea Outbreak
The company donated more than $3.6 million to conservative groups between 2020 and 2025, including $1 million to the MAGA Inc. super PAC.
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 03/08/2026
Why am I just hearing about Francesca Hong today?
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 30/07/2026
please tell me it is someone who can continue to push this narrative that there are more than one horse.
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 30/07/2026
when looking for borosilicate petri dishes.. why does the item description say "for science"? is that not obvious? what else would you do with a petri dish?
static.klipy.com
Muppet Show: Beaker & Bunsen Honeydew Lab Experiment
ALT: Muppet Show: Beaker & Bunsen Honeydew Lab Experiment
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 30/07/2026
It’s been a long day, and I’ve got a bottle of scotch bigger than my head. Not that anything bad happened today, it’s just that I don’t know how to tell time without wearing my watch and I’m in a good mood.
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 28/07/2026
i think it is absolutely bullshit that people still post things to X that requires you to log in to view content. nope nope nope
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 28/07/2026
arrgh! there's too many books to read! not enough time! my reading list has grown too damn long. my to-be-read list is 176 titles. i need to make sure i have spare glasses in case of the apocalypse.
static.klipy.com
Twilight Zone: Time Enough at Last
ALT: Twilight Zone: Time Enough at Last
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 24/07/2026
does anyone else think their email and text messages have become uselessly inundated with spam? perhaps time for a new messaging system that replaces both with some sort of consent system that prioritizes your privacy?
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 24/07/2026
Next administration needs to push through a law that sitting presidents cannot have shot named after themselves, and a moratorium on naming things after presidents must wait 25 years, or something. His name is everywhere!
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 23/07/2026
It’s my birthday this weekend. And I seem to be running low on bourbon. Hint hint.
static.klipy.com
Lucille Bluth's Surprised Wink (Arrested Development)
Alt: Lucille Bluth's Surprised Wink (Arrested Development)
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 23/07/2026
And what if you’re not a California resident?
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 22/07/2026
UPS was supposed to deliver a package between noon and 4. it is now 5pm and i have not seen a UPS truck. logistics is obviously a lie at this point
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Reposted by Cory Ottenwess
Electronic Frontier Foundation @eff.org · 22/07/2026
What does a court case about drivers reporting police checks have to do with social media and freedom of speech? Potentially, a lot. A new ruling of the EU's top court risks pushing platforms to monitor what we say online. www.eff.org/deeplinks/2...
eff.org
New EU Court of Justice Ruling on Platform Liability Could Cause
Intermediary liability laws around the world recognize that social media platforms, search engines, and other online service providers have become an integral part of our lives: they shape how we
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 22/07/2026
for some ungodly reason, classmates[dot]com has been sending me a stupid amount of marketing email lately. it took forever to figure out how to delete my account. that is some bullshit predatory practices. someone should in court for that shit.
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 21/07/2026
@scalzi.com put his book library up on humble bundle to raise money for World Central Kitchen. Feed some people, and your brain some good stories!
humblebundle.com
Humble Book Bundle: The John Scalzi Collection: Old Man's War & More by TOR Books
Discover your new favorite author with this bundle of books from sci-fi humorist John Scalzi! Pay what you want and support World Central Kitchen!
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 21/07/2026
Is Rubio the new McCarthy? We never learned our lesson the first time did we? He’s just going to start calling American citizens “un-American “ because they don’t lick trump stump?
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Cory Ottenwess @coryottenwess.com · 17/07/2026
What about elected all officials?
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