iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 08/07/2026

I was doing some photo editing at kareoke and my friend gigachad'd me, shockingly looked actually halfway like a gigachad.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 25/06/2026

You've all had your fun. Summer's cancelled.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 10/06/2026

Too many people followed me expecting selfies. Too bad, that shit happens about once a year. We're World Eaters posting today.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 05/06/2026

I'm now realizing I haven't posted a current selfie in a goddamn long time. So anyways, I lost 80 pounds last year.

Selfie of the most generic white man in their 30's imaginable, the dipshit didn't even realize the light is reflecting off his glasses in a silly way.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 02/06/2026

What is the point of a State of Play if the game we're all waiting for has been all but confirmed to be never coming out. Bloodborne Remaster never, and for this, an infinite rain of poxes and toads upon all.

The Hunter and the Doll sit somberly at a news desk. The ticker reads "THERE IS NO NEWS". There has not been news for a decade. All is dust and ash in my mouth. The Old Blood has faded. The young'uns no longer yearn. Is this what it feels like to know true despair?

Oh also they have tea.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

did you know you can have as many rooks as players in a marathon lobby if you wipe the enemy squads out do you want to know how i found this out

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

There is good news, though. Quills might be good at voice acting. I, however, have become absolutely fantastic at the art of repeatedly stabbing people to death.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

There's Oomfies. And then there's loading up an extraction shooter and finding out you have to clutch against your mutual. Anyways, uh, hey @voice-quills.com , sorry about screaming "QUILLS GODDAMNIT IF THIS IS THE VOICE ACTOR I FOLLOW ON TWITTER I'M FUCKING KILLING MYSELF" directly into a mic.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 04/11/2025

The sandwich exploded on me. I could feel it through my bulletproof vest. The worst part about it, though, was the smells. Onions. Mustard. I'll never forget what I went through that day. How could I. How could anyone. Mustard stains, oh god, the mustard stains.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 04/11/2025

Watching two people who desperately want to laugh at someone who made their lives hell dying but can't because they're about to be the mayor and mayoress of New York City is hysterical. He literally just does this and tries his damndest to not say anything.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 04/11/2025

They even have image edits of the characters in Broncos gear for taunting their opponents on social media. Incredible work. Just an absolutely devastating claim by the Broncos fanbase, they're having a fantastic season as well so the fans are going OFF.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 04/11/2025

Easily one of the funniest crossovers of the modern era is the fact that the Denver Broncos fanbase has decided that they will co-opt one of the most popular video games of 2025 to make highlight reels with. That game? Umamusume: Pretty Derby.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 03/11/2025

We've been doing work on a baker's house for a bit and today he came into the office with a thank you gift, and HOLY SHIT THE BEST CANNOLIS IN BOSTON JUST GOT HAND DELIVERED TO THE OFFICE OH FUCK ME OH GOD

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 27/10/2025

The plane they used in this scene was actively being used to transport arms around the world and the arms dealer they bought some of the guns in the film from was like "oh yeah I have a plane shipping guns down there, you wanna use it in the film?" Insane shit.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 27/10/2025

One of my favorites movies is Lord of War, not because of the movie itself, but because everything involved in the production is absolutely insane.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 24/10/2025

I have fucked over people with Eternal Weekend prize money with this card. Now I show it to you, MTG community: The answer to Firebending in a single. goddamn. card.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 24/10/2025

They announced a Switch 2 version of Factorio and all I can think about is this post

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 20/10/2025

Me when Melville chucks another throwaway line into his books that will be better than anything I've ever written or will ever be able to write

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 20/10/2025

Out boss wants us to have weekly meetings as an office on Mondays and Fridays. Had the first morning of meetings and they were all productive and blew by, unlike every other job I've ever worked. You can have... Meetings... That don't suck...?

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 13/10/2025

A reprint of Armageddon and these four would fix me, I fear.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 13/10/2025

Shout-out to my friend who pet a rabbit and got a ribbon for doing so while my other friend found a My Melody on the ground, based and farmpilled.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 13/10/2025

Went to the State Fair. Remains absolutely fantastic in terms of vibes.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 09/10/2025

LANCER MENTIONED ENGAGE BIG SAL PROPAGANDA OPERATIONS

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 09/10/2025

Oh yeah, looks good to me. Looks good to the markerlight as well.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 09/10/2025

With a cast iron meat grinder, you can turn your sprues into basing materials. Just cut em into big bits, pop 'em into the grinder, and boom. Instant rubble. Alternatively, since 3rd edition there has been a forbidden technique for Necrons that Games Workship doesn't want you to know about.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 08/10/2025

Scoop when asking why he's missing Commander with the Boys and heading to Taco Tuesday:

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 08/10/2025

me and the other four Massachusetts MTG influencers arguing over whether or not we're Strixhaven or Innistrad (We are both)

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 08/10/2025

Not to be this guy, but I respectfully disagree with Amy. We've had Masshole representation for quite some time.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 07/10/2025

After a month and a half, Walgreens finally filled my Adderall prescription. We're so fucking back, folks.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 04/10/2025

Views at the wedding I'm at are pretty solid. Only thing that could make it better is maybe an Amazon delivery center, maybe a Walmart.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 03/10/2025

WE'RE SO FUCKING BACK IT'S NEVER BEEN MORE BACK SKONG IS REAL, BF6 IS REAL, AND NOW FUCKIN' PROTOMEN ACT III IS REAL OH MY GOD IT'S NEVER BEEN MORE FUCKING BACK THAN IT IS AT THIS VERY MOMENT I'M FUCKING GOING INSANE AAAAAHHHHHHHHH

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 30/09/2025

Real answer: Rome. First few months are for the gods, latter half are just counting. January and February were added later by Julius Caesar, and boom, we get the modern Julian Calendar.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 26/09/2025

Me for like 20 years of my life: oh I'm much closer to my mom in terms of temperament, humor, and hobbies. My dad, the second he realized I was an adult and he could stop masking around me:

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 26/09/2025

I'm realizing now I forgot to explain her newest hire: René Zagger. She hired fucking EMET SELCH TO PLAY THE DEVIL. Also, he is romanceable. So. You know.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 24/09/2025

also shoutout to the reprints, which added the single greatest line of flavor text ever printed outside of Rancor. Flavor win on every level.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 24/09/2025

me: seven drops with no protection are completely unplayable, your deck should top at six and anything above that is probably going to be cut eventually. also me: baby. baby that wasn't about you. baby you know i love you baby BABY NO DON'T TARGET ME WITH ONE RED MANA OPEN BABY I CAN CHANGE

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 24/09/2025

Ahab goes on a tirade against God in one chapter towards the middle, and the line "Talk not to me of blasphemy, man; I'd strike the sun if it insulted me." is uttered and somehow, beyond all comprehension, is not even approaching the apex of the absurd lines in the screed.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 23/09/2025

"Matt that's a horse, how can he be an athlete" that's not a fucking horse, that's the greatest athletic instrument to ever live. That's Secretariat. You want to know how absurd his performance was? Belmont Stakes is a mile and a half race. Secretariat won by 83 yards. TWO HUNDRED FIFTY FEET.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 23/09/2025

Been thinking about athletes with such absurd performances that the modern era refuses to yield to them, folks who reached the peak so early that decades later the people trying to scale the mountain of their achievements will almost assuredly never reach the pinnacle.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 23/09/2025

Imagine you're in line to see Troy Baker at Comic-Con, the guy behind you's phone goes off, you turn around, it's HIDEO FUCKING KOJIMA, and he's just standing with his signature book and PSA graded photo cards like

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 22/09/2025

Alternatively, me sending sixteen emails and making a half-dozen phone calls telling people to fuck off, we're not using them because they're bloodsucking vampire companies that don't do dick for shit (LOOKING AT YOU, YELP AND ANGI, STOP CALLING GODDAMN IT).

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 16/09/2025

50,000 powder gangers used to live here. Now it's a ghost town.

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Matt, Dad Hat Enthusiast @chowder.bsky.social · 15/09/2025

Honestly, sometimes, we have no choice but to stan.

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