Reposted by Chris Thorburnsexy baba yaga @beardynoise.bsky.social · 25/03/2026Now I'm thinking of one of the many great @cbthorburn.bsky.social posts 1163
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 12/02/2026Tonight on Scrubs: *whoosh sfx* Catch me, my not gay chocolate angel bear! EEEAAAAGLE! Anyway Mrs Haggerty, the cancer has spread to your brain. 🎵 lights will guide you home 🎵 0112
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 11/02/2026Fuck your ChatGPT, if I want to see a caricature of myself I will make the effort to go to the seaside and pay £15 for a cruel man to give me body dysmorphia like we’ve always done. 4998257
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 06/02/2026Performed a song I wrote about the short that screened before A Goofy Movie in 1995 cause I’m allowed to do that 46222
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 11/01/2026In times like these, we need Balloon Writing Guy more than ever 0111
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 08/01/2026The collective Jackass cast should do the Criterion Closet, which we now know to be a van, while the van goes speeding down the highway careening round corners and the Jackass boys fly into the shelves trying to pick out and discuss art house films the entire time. 517246
Reposted by Chris ThorburnMark Harrison @markharrison.bsky.social · 02/01/2026tiktok.comThe SCREAM movies #standup #standupcomedy #comedy #film #horror #movies @Monkey Barrel Comedy TikTok video by Chris Thorburn 021
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 29/12/2025The Safdies should make a stressful kids movie about how Santa gets it all done in one night 050
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 25/12/2025Being back at my parents got me feeling all sorts of ways. Was just doing dishes and saw a particular fork and said “god I’ve not seen you in a while” 1260
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 24/12/2025The energy I’m bringing at the dinner table the second someone brings up ChatGPT 0290
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 17/12/2025The amount of songs that know a key change and sax solo is an option and don’t is a fucking disgrace 2142
Reposted by Chris ThorburnBilly Domineau 🇵🇸 @billydomineau.bsky.social · 14/12/2025At SNL I worked with artists who made the funniest, stupidest graphics in no time flat. Some of my biggest jokes would have been impossible without these geniuses building an insane image or finding the perfect real-life photo of a politician. Sucks that their work is being pushed aside for slop. 3467321387
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 01/12/2025Giddy up Jinglehorse, for fucks sake. Pick up your feet, you cunt. 0182
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 24/11/2025RIP Jay Gatsby, you’d have loved party 4 u by Charli XCX 050
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 15/11/2025I’ve been silent about this long enough, seeing ITVX programming on Disney+ makes me sick to my stomach. 261
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 14/11/2025We did it everyone. We made men embarrassed to read books by women in public once again. Great work. 0182
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 03/11/2025I’m sorry you think I “ruined” your Gatsby-themed party by sleeping with your wife and dying in the pool. 37618
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 31/10/2025Me: I feel like maybe I don't allow myself to be happy because deep down there's a part of me that believes I don't deserve to be, you know? Dr Loomis: *scribbling notes* dead eyes pure evil 071
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 29/10/2025They say A.I. can replace our jobs but I’d like to see A.I. quickly burn out and make the overall environment toxic. Okay I’m being told that’s the main thing it does. 520624
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 28/10/2025Waiting patiently for my 3G to search and save Don Draper I Don’t Think About You At All Meme so I can win this argument. 070
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 28/10/2025I can’t help but notice you’ve not immediately paid me for the invoice it took me seven months to get round to sending you. 0201
Reposted by Chris ThorburnChris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 30/09/2023Head barista: So I'm thinking we offer rolls, full breakfasts, hot drinks to sit in or takeaway... Tim Robinson character in the back: yeah and what if the whole cafe could be dracula themed 1333477
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 24/10/2025some awful nice timbers you’ve got there be a shame if someone were to shiver them 519723
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 23/10/2025Dinner - CANNOT have the same thing twice in 1 week or so help me god - Need veg, protein, carbs, all the groups - Need to clean 8 dishes - All day's been leading up to this, don't fuck it up Breakfast - Same shit every day - Hot coffee - Cereal - Smash hit every time - The best 3577
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 23/10/2025There is an epidemic amongst young men and it’s looking at your phone at the urinal. Look at you, you’re doing it right now. 1130
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 23/10/2025I genuinely believe raincoats that are yellow are more waterproof and there’s no science to back that up 913211
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 22/10/2025Love this picture of Batman with a tablet like he’s about to tell you there’s a 50 minute wait for a table but he can seat you at the bar 25710
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 22/10/2025After the films about Dylan going electric and Springsteen going acoustic, I cannot wait for the 2+ hour Oscar bait biopic all about when Tom Waits went full Cookie Monster 38418
Reposted by Chris ThorburnEleanor Morton @eleanormorton.bsky.social · 27/06/2025It's so funny knowing someone who created a meme @cbthorburn.bsky.social 11024
Reposted by Chris ThorburnThe Alternative Comedy Memorial Society (ACMS) @theacms.bsky.social · 03/06/2025Two months till #edfringe? Here, have a time-ordered list of gig recommendations: noblefailure.org/ed25 Ben Target! @cbthorburn.bsky.social! Elf Lyons! @jennyfromthequiz.bsky.social! @josielong.bsky.social! @joznorris.bsky.social! @leslieis.cool! @turlygod.bsky.social! @vixleyton.bsky.social! 2114
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 01/05/2025when the casino asked me to leave my own stag do 0142
Reposted by Chris ThorburnMonkey Barrel Comedy @monkeybarrelcomedy.bsky.social · 19/03/2025🍌 TOP BANANA 🍌 Tonight at 7pm & 9pm! Catch our weekly new act / new material show, featuring all the best newcomers and a top headliner - for just £3! @cbthorburn.bsky.social & #KatieGreen host and headline 🎟 buff.ly/VMwVeVx . . . #comedy #edinburgh #whatsonedinburgh #monkeybarrel 021
Reposted by Chris ThorburnThe Alternative Comedy Memorial Society (ACMS) @theacms.bsky.social · 11/03/2025Much gig goodness coming to Glasgow Comedy Festival (glasgowcomedyfestival.com/events/) this month, go see e.g. Joe Sutherland! Kemah Bob! Fern Brady! @cbthorburn.bsky.social! Kieran Hodgson! @jainedwards.bsky.social! Richard Brown! Watching Bad Movies With Great Comedians! With more Chris Thorburn! 167
Reposted by Chris ThorburnOnce Upon A VHS - 80s and 90s Fantasy Podcast @onceuponavhs.bsky.social · 01/03/2025My muppet and I saw you from across the bar and we really dig your vibe 3274
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 16/01/2025David Lynch was my favourite director and I’m absolutely floored by his loss. Here’s the stupid joke of mine he inspired. Thanks for everything David. 06715
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 27/12/2024Not sure what to get that special someone for Christmas? Well it was two days ago so I’m sorry. You’ve fucked it. Anyway I’m bringing a new Work In Progress to Glasgow Comedy Festival in March and tickets are on sale now. www.glasgowcomedyfestival.com/performances... 0143
Reposted by Chris Thorburnfleewitt.bsky.social @fleewitt.bsky.social · 07/12/2024In the spirit of Christmas I'm going to use my first post to draw attention to something by @cbthorburn.bsky.social that has greatly improved my enjoyment of Jingle Bell Rock 2738
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 06/12/2024some awful nice timbers you’ve got there be a shame if someone were to shiver them 2864
Reposted by Chris ThorburnAndrew Stout @thomasacstout.bsky.social · 01/12/2024The original tweet made me laugh so uncontrollably that my family made coasters out of it 216215
Chris Thorburn @cbthorburn.bsky.social · 30/11/2024Members of the jury, I ask you: why do we enjoy Mars? Is it the flavour? The texture? Or is it the great big throbbing vein? 512918
Reposted by Chris ThorburnFearghas Kelly @fearghaskelly.com · 29/11/2024THIS THURSDAY – FINAL SHOW OF 2024! One whole year of Screen Time, whodathunkit? Wrapping it up in style with another class lineup: 📺 Chris Thorburn 📺 Amelia Bayler 📺 Amanda Dwyer 📺 Rory Spence 📅 Thursday 5 December 📍 The Stand Comedy Club, Glasgow 🎟️ www.thestand.co.uk/performance/... 194
