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Dysfunctional panic hardware

@caelanaegana.bsky.social
102 followers 139 following 1.7K posts

Forget the audacity of hope; embrace the practicality of cynicism. Human rights aren't negotiable. Real-life professional void screamer, disaster expert, and beagle-chaser. linktr.ee/caelanaegana

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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Haha loser
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Free idea: If you are running for Congress or the Senate, start carrying around a golden plunger. Say nothing about it, just carry it in a visible way.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Me: We need to do the things. Also me: We don't want to do those things. My chronic illness: If you do not do the things now I will make sure you don't have the energy to do them later and you will feel anxious and inconvenienced forever.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Trying to think of who besides Nosferatu Miller could have written that UN speech.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
He's not great at walking either
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Ambassador Ken Fairfax (ret) @portlandken.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
The accounting is in: In Oregon there are 111 data centers. The TOTAL number of people employed at data centers is just 2,630, or 0.1% of the labor force. Those 100 data centers consumer 23% of all electricity used in Oregon. Meanwhile, electricity rates skyrocket as more centers are built.
opb.org
Oregon data centers by the numbers: 111 facilities consume nearly one-quarter of state’s power, according to new report
A first-of-its-kind report details the footprint of the controversial facilities.
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Robert Maguire @robertmaguire.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Trump became the presumptive GOP nominee on March 12, 2024, and within days, he started creating new companies and slapping his name on products. He hasn't stopped since. The tally now stands at 81 new businesses—36 since taking office (he started two more while I was drafting this report)
citizensforethics.org
Trump incorporated dozens of new companies in lead up to second term—and never stopped - CREW | Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington
Trump filed a financial disclosure in June revealing he brought in more than $2.2 billion in revenue during 2025. We found that more than a third of that revenue came from dozens of companies Trump ha...
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
Supposedly nonstick ceramic pan: You do not want an omelette. You want scrambled eggs.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Has anyone else noticed this trend of local newspapers' feeds just being ads in disguise? "Things our experts say are a bargain at Macy's sale this weekend." "Your areas Top 5 tacos: Try them Now." "What real estate REALLY costs in your area." Etc.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
To all those currently on I-90: CHECK YOUR FUCKING BLIND SPOT. Seriously wtf is wrong with all of you I've never had to lay on my horn so much.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
You know what other concentration camp-having country had a thriving international tourist industry?
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
I'm sorry about this, reaper, but I need to speak to your manager.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
My dog's nose is whistling in her sleep and some traumatized brain cell of mine keeps thinking it's hearing a smoke detector with a low battery. 🫩
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Malaclypse the Middle @malaclypse.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
Imagine if this investment had been on solar panels, batteries, and micromobility infrastructure.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
Fuck this nakedly corrupt Supreme Court.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
$5.51 fee to use a delivery locker on what was probably less than a $20 exchange to begin with? What a grift. They should be ashamed of themselves.
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Mrs. Betty Bowers @mrsbettybowers.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
Hakeem Jeffries and Jared Kushner met today to see what they have in common. It turns out to be only one thing: A stupefying fear of progressive Democrats accomplishing lots of things that will help people.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
I was right now years old when I realized the reason I can never find a comfortable pillow is because my neck is hypermobile. Bunched up blankets it is for the rest of my life, I guess.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
SCOTUS conservatives really just showing their whole ass these days
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
Just when you are settled in, the dogs gently snoring, restlessness slowly changing into the light scattered nonsense of a dream... A furry pillow hog unleashes the most sulfurous butt bomb right next to your face.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
It would be nice if the Star Dept./DOGE hadn't fired every diplomacy expert on Iran. And every other subject matter expert for that matter.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
Theoretically, if we have a President Vance (ugh) pretty soon, what happens to Kushner and Witkoff and our very good (??!!) relationship with North Korea? He's such an empty shell of a human being it's tough to figure out exactly what insanity comes next.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 16/08/2026
Trump's Dept of Energy just stripped citizen stakeholders like native tribes, agriculture, fisheries, and water users along the Columbia of their voices on the future Hanford nuclear Superfund site. The Citizens Advisory Council has shrunk from 70 to 20, all of whom will be DOE-appointed.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
The subject of the video appears to lack theory of mind. He is unable to understand that the knowledge of others is different than the knowledge of himself. Conclusion: subject has the cognitive development level of a typical 4 year old child.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
There should be a feature built in with every social media site to check if the thing you're about to post in nonsense without additional context. Set it to gentle "hey friend, you wanna read over that again?" or slap-you-inna-face.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
There is no way they managed to squeeze that decrepit, inflexible old fat man in an airline food cart. But I look forward to AI animators trying to math it out.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 10/08/2026
The separate vaccine idea was proposed in the Wakefield study 30 YEARS AGO. That's the same study that was retracted in 2010 for offensively poor methodology. Reporting found that the children in the study (8. Yes, 8.) were subjected to painful, and risky, and unnecessary experimentation.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
Seems like that could backfire. Rhetorically, why are politicians so half-assed at this stuff?
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 03/08/2026
Dear people with drones near Spokane: WTF are you doing? You're blocking air support to get the fire under control. More than 700 homes have already burned. What the hell is wrong with you. Same to anyone driving vehicles into blocked zones. Nobody should have to tell you this.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 03/08/2026
John Cornyn is apparently really easy to bamboozle and/or blackmail. Democrats are not likely to remember this.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 03/08/2026
John Cornyn is apparently really easy to bamboozle and/or blackmail. Democrats are not likely to remember this.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
Thinking about a recent video with an economist saying that consumer sentiment started declining around 2020 when people started to notice their own dissatisfaction. It might only have been showing up in surveys at that point, but how do you think Trump's election happened in the first place?
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
Citizens United made this inevitable, and SCOTUS knew it at the time. It's time to reform the court.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 31/07/2026
Corey Doctorow mentioned him on Jon Stewart's podcast, alongside another excellent podcast No Gods, No Mayors. I'm concerned my Internet might be too bubble now.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
If life in the US ever normalizes, us Millennials are going to suffer a collective identity crisis. If we're not getting our hourly cortisol spike from the newest end of the world threat, do we even exist?
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 28/07/2026
Political news has been suspiciously quiet over the last week or so. That makes me more anxious than normal.
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ProPublica @propublica.org · 24/07/2026
We found that the sepsis rate in second-trimester pregnancy loss hospitalizations increased by more than 50% under Texas’ abortion ban. Here’s how we did our analysis. (Published Feb. 2025)
propublica.org
Texas Won’t Study How Its Abortion Ban Impacts Women, So We Did
Since Texas banned abortion, no one has studied the statewide effects on pregnant women experiencing complications. Here’s how we sifted through data on millions of pregnancy hospitalizations and anal...
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 24/07/2026
-Dumps personal fortune into failing social app -Designs cars that look like cardboard props from B movies. -Builds cars that fall apart, literally -Leverages failing car company and failing social app into now-failing space company. -public persona is cringe if not infuriating. Why is he a CEO?
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 24/07/2026
In case anyone is wondering how the West is doing right now.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 22/07/2026
Me: time to sleep Hypersensitive nerve endings: No, it is time to remove every last dry, itchy skin cell. I know where they all are, and I have a priority list.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 22/07/2026
I haven't seen this being shared much but if anything is a big enough pain point for the geriatric babboon in the Oval it might be his tech donors.
Amazon data center in bahrain struck and destroyed by Iranian cruise missiles, reports Tom's Hardware on 7/21/2026
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 20/07/2026
Given Trump's very obvious combination of dementia-induced wandering and narcissistic attention-seeking, your think all events would have a plan in place to handle where he goes. Macron did it masterfully at Versailles. FIFA has no excuse really.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
The clown show gets louder... And hairier
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 13/07/2026
British intelligence has reportedly allegorized the 🍊 White House's atmosphere to a cross between The Crucible and Wolf Hall. If only he could be afflicted with an excruciating, festering leg wound.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
The reaper MISSED AGAIN. But they're getting closer.
US Senator Lindsay Graham has died, reports the BBC on Saturday evening 7/11/2026.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
He wants to nuke them SO bad. Desperately encouraging that blood clot at this point
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 08/07/2026
JD really is the anti-poster boy for this administration.
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 01/07/2026
It was literally built by Boeing you utter piece of human garbage
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
I was wondering what was taking so long. I know people who are impacted by this rule. It could lead to self-harm or worse. Someday I could be impacted by it. It's nothing short of cruelty. ground.news/article/fina...
ground.news
Democrats in half of states sue Trump administration over Medicaid work rules
Democrats in 25 states and the District of Columbia on Monday sued the Trump administration over its recent guidance on new Medicaid work requirements, arguing the strict rules will prevent eligible A...
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Dysfunctional panic hardware @caelanaegana.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
That eagle is 100% shitting on whoever walks out that door.
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