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Alice Lastname

@belligerent.bsky.social
279 followers 425 following 183 posts

I’m neither particularly funny nor particularly thought-provoking.

PostsRepliesMedia
Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 06/02/2026
Has anyone thought about proposing single payer healthcare and just calling it trumpcare, because I feel like he’d get on board and the name might be worth it til he leaves office.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 02/02/2026
www.justice.gov/epstein/file... they’re all breathtakingly horrific people. This dude advised Sarkozy on African affairs.
justice.gov
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 13/11/2025
Speaking of Farkas this is also a perfectly normal thing to write to a sex trafficker
House exhibit 6998, email from Jonathan Farkas to Epstein, “REDACTED seeing me at lunch early July I hate you for introducing me to her can’t get her out of my mind what do you think will happen between Trump and Xi have a great f 35 story but not for e mail and it’s no state secret” dated 6/25/2019
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 30/08/2025
If the tariffs are ultimately unconstitutional we’re gonna have to give massive refunds to Amazon and Temu and nothing to the people who actually bought the shit at a markup, thanks to our feckless President.
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Black Aziz Anansi @blackazizanansi.blacksky.app · 28/08/2025
Share this tweet if you are down for a national walkout.
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Sacto_Steve @sactosteve.bsky.social · 16/08/2025
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 15/08/2025
Calzone
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 15/08/2025
I’ve said “what the ever loving fuck” out loud at least 8 times today about current events, but this is the ever loving fuckiest.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 15/08/2025
Bringing back that National Origins Formula, I see.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 15/08/2025
That’s the trick, I’m from the area and have to introduce it to other people as sort-of-Greek-inspired meat sauce and then they usually get into it.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 14/08/2025
Scrotox-level smoothness + the elusive male birth control option all in one elegant solution!
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 14/08/2025
My favorite one (this was, at least briefly, real).
Google’s AI describing removing wrinkles from your scrotum with a steamer or iron.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 11/08/2025
@govpritzker.illinois.gov hi there, ^ this would annoy all the worst people and also be a win for gay folks in backwards states if you want to get a jump on it.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 11/08/2025
So sort of - all states have to recognize all marriages from other states, including the gay ones, but states can elect not to issue marriage licenses to gay couples. Hoping Illinois starts letting zoom marriages and online license issuance for out of state couples happen to alleviate this.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 11/08/2025
It’s true but also the idiocy of tariffs on Switzerland being higher than tariffs on China should not go unremarked upon.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 25/07/2025
The FBI / DOJ has the files unless they’ve been destroyed - they’re just “sealed” from public release.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 25/07/2025
Not releasing the files is different than not building a case for and then prosecuting the perpetrators of sex crimes, though.
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scha·den·freu·de @blisterpearl.bsky.social · 24/07/2025
And a plurality of voters fell for it. Unpresidented.
"It was miraculous. It was almost no trick at all, he saw, to turn vice into virtue and slander into truth, impotence into abstinence, arrogance into humility, plunder into philanthropy, thievery into honor, blasphemy into wisdom, brutality into patriotism, and sadism into justice.
Anybody could do it; it required no brains at all. It merely required no character."
- Joseph Heller, Catch 22
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 23/07/2025
I don’t care about nudity but suppose I prefer for it to either be solicited or expected (sauna = ok, flashing = not so much) but either way, use of women’s rooms involves no nudity, so even people who might have valid reasons to avoid dick will be able to do so regardless of who else uses it.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 22/07/2025
Even the normal guys have a hard time accepting that I’ve never inadvertently seen genitalia in a public bathroom. Urinals aren’t a thing for us. I’ve no idea what the other women have going on downstairs.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 19/07/2025
Well you see, if we learn new things we might accidentally challenge our preconceived notions, and that’s un-American.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 16/07/2025
It’s so depressing but it wouldn’t even matter if he released concrete proof he was guilty. His fan club will just pivot to defending him. “Mary was only 14!” “How could he have known they were minors?” “They got paid so are they REALLY victims??” It’s so predictable he should just get it over with.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 10/07/2025
I don’t even understand why they’re bothering to cover it up so hard. If they released irrefutable proof Trump was involved his supporters would just pivot to “ok but how much puberty is, like, enough puberty?”
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 09/07/2025
Why do we undo things that everyone universally wants just to be dillholes.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 09/07/2025
I could tell something really normal happened while I was busy with work, when the first thing in Trending was “MechaHitler.”
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 04/07/2025
We don’t even need to secede (it would be real clunky) - what we need to do is raise state income taxes in the blue states, collectively, to pre-2017 levels (or Clinton era, even better) and use our $80+bn to fund interstate compacts to provide needed services.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 01/07/2025
It’s wishful thinking but I’d like the blue states to up their taxes so we’re all paying what we would have been paying without this ridiculous bill and then make interstate compacts to provide the services these morons are cutting. I feel bad for the blue dots but we should help who we can.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 27/06/2025
Right but New York spending 1.2bn on stadiums for various sports teams is just capitalism at its best, obviously. My dudes, we need the bread BEFORE the circuses.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 18/06/2025
It should be really obvious to these folks he’s a hard right religious nutbag. Trump called people who did vandalism to Teslas domestic terrorists who should be deported to El Salvador, and is basically silent on this guy. If he were a Dem, this would not be the case.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 15/06/2025
All these articles about the MN assassin being a “Walz appointee” and it took like 2 seconds to google that appointees to that committee are nominated by industry groups, and not like, Walz’s hand-picked besties. This fact is unmentioned in the articles. Irresponsible.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 08/06/2025
If a righty says “states’ rights” what they mean is “the state’s right to restrict individual liberties.”
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 06/06/2025
All the federal government needs to do is have a pay-per-view duel to the death between Trump and Musk and then we wouldn’t even have a deficit anymore.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 06/06/2025
I just wish neither of them had the nuclear codes.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 25/04/2025
The lesson is that the one who misbehaves the most, gets extra snacks.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 18/04/2025
This has to be underreported - the Venn diagram of folks who won’t vaccinate their kids and folks who would avoid taking their sick kids to the doctor feels like it’d be a circle.
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Hakeem Jefferson @hakeemjefferson.bsky.social · 18/04/2025
I think a lot abt how marginalized people are expected to be perfect just to be treated w/ basic dignity, just to access legal protection. But democracy can’t mean rights for the respectable few. It has to mean fair and just treatment even for those seen as least deserving. That’s the real test.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 10/04/2025
I don’t like him and I disagree with 80% of what he believes, but that 20% (criminal justice reform, occasional foreign policy stuff, government spying on its citizens, and now this) means I find myself agreeing with him almost the most of any sitting Republican.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 09/04/2025
Dear next Democratic President, when you bring back the WPA to counter the effects of the Trump Depression, I would like more trains please.
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Randall Munroe @xkcd.com · 08/04/2025
Tariffs xkcd.com/3073
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 07/04/2025
I agree but also think we need to change the civics to actually prevent this. There’s no better case for more checks and balances than this shit.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 07/04/2025
This is real “Jerry Seinfeld complaining that woke today means he wouldn’t be able to make Seinfeld while cashing a $500m check from Netflix for streaming rights to Seinfeld” energy.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 06/04/2025
Tariffs will take money out of everyone’s pocket, leaving less to spend on the wares of domestic sellers.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 04/04/2025
Don’t forget to divide it in half first.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 04/04/2025
Oop and it’s gone we’re now down in the last year.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 04/04/2025
As of this morning, the S&P500 is up 0.25% in the last year! America is truly great.
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 03/04/2025
Is it gayer now because of the sudden influx of bears?
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 03/04/2025
Stagflation, all I never wanted Stagflation, have to get away Stagflation, America will be alone
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Alice Lastname @belligerent.bsky.social · 03/04/2025
We also have robber barons!
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