iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

I'm just. I'm just really happy that it wasn't a Democrat fucking up a sports team thing. About Iowa. And Georgia. And then Amy, sweet Amy who has wanted to land THIS EXACT MOMENT for FOUR SOLID YEARS.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

A lot of FBI employees had to remove "Animal Lover" from their dating profiles this week.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

Dear Intergalactic Tech Support: We taught the sand to think and now the sand is better at thinking than we are and we're very worried about the sand. Help? PS: Actually the sand problem might be making the carbon problem worse? Again, help. Sorry to bother you again, Earth

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

Wallet Inspector admits he was actually stealing your wallet the last four times but actually he's cleaned up and found God and actually, I know, ironic, got a real job at Federal Wallet Inspection Agency and his badge is being rush ordered but right now he really needs you to hand him your wallet.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 28/08/2026

Literally everyone told me how good Slow Horses was and not one of you told me how hilariously on the nose Mick Jagger's theme song is. Like, "Will Smith in a nineties action movie theme song's music video" level nuance.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 26/08/2026

This is a thing that definitely already happened four months ago and by now has been progressing for quite some time and most of those agents have stalled out or run out of resources already but some of them have Not.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

All over America, in towns you have not heard of but probably will by the end of the year, dads are rolling out their vibe-coded school-specific social network Web apps, which will teach them 25 years of hard won moderation and data privacy lessons before Christmas.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 07/08/2026

Fortunately, we know that when a moderate Democrat means "go to war," they mean "capitulate to all their demands, argue that pushing back is both impossible and unrealistic, and aggressively shove the overton window in the direction of their opponent's ideological preferences."

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 01/08/2026

Star Trek IV The Voyage Home : Star Trek Movies :: Yellow Submarine : Revolver

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 19/07/2026

Are you a conservative grifter not getting the lift you needed being "Big Mad about a black lady in the Odyssey?" Podcast numbers limp? Great news! Disney+ has a new movie with an ASIAN Mad Hatter! Get in on the ground floor! You'll be booking protein supplements again in no time! #NotMyHatter

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 13/07/2026

Such a relief. I was really worried after that cut to black.

Tony Soprano and his wife, alive, with today's Washington Post.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 09/07/2026

Clint Eastwood is 96 and every day his Manager and a team of lawyers have to take a call with him where they convince him not to make The Kyle Rittenhouse Movie.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 08/07/2026

"Our Dear Most Alive Senator McConnell called us today and spoke with perfect eloquence for many minutes. He gave correct and very lucid answers to all our difficult questions. Then he played a perfect round of golf: eighteen holes in one in a row!"

famous North Korean news anchor presenting a broadcast.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 23/06/2026

Me: I'm sorry, I know we've met before and you just said it, but I just have an absolutely horrible memory for names. Also me: Pizza in the morning Pizza in the evening Pizza at supper time When pizza's on a bagel You can eat pizza anytime.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 22/06/2026

Congratulations to Kier Starmer for staying in office for an unprecedented FOURTEEN Liz Trusses.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 20/06/2026

@gizmodo.com This is happening on your site right now. It's very bad. Shut it down right now.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 20/06/2026

Donald Trump is the only President in history to care about reflecting pool maintenance AT ALL ON ANY LEVEL, and he's so incompetent he destroyed the reflecting pool. President Lennie Small.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 06/06/2026

Seeing old works with new eyes.

Jonathan Swift's Gulliver's Travels cover with a man tied down with ropes by lilliputians.

Tonight's episode: the writer's barely-disguised fetish.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 03/06/2026

“ᴹʸ ⁿᵃᵐᵉ ᶦˢ ᴼᶻʸᵐᵃⁿᵈᶦᵃˢ, ᴷᶦⁿᵍ ᵒᶠ ᴷᶦⁿᵍˢ.” ᴸᵒᵒᵏ ᵒⁿ ᵐʸ ʷᵒʳᵏˢ ʸᵉ ᴹᶦᵍʰᵗʸ, ᵃⁿᵈ ᵈᵉˢᵖᵃᶦʳᵎ

Turtle on a toppled Japanese pagoda in a pond

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 03/06/2026

Spider Noir has more confirmations that you REALLY, TRULY want to watch the black and white version than the Supreme Court recognizes is necessary to enforce a legally binding contract.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 24/05/2026

Me reading about another four felonies openly committed by the President and cabinet-level members of the Trump administration this morning, just like every other morning since January 20th, 2025.

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Reposted by Benjamin Johns

Brendel @brendelbored.bsky.social · 01/06/2023

Only 42 months until Space Hotel

A New York Post story about a fantastic hotel opening in space

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 01/05/2026

Hey Google Send an apology text To my roommate For eating all her plums In the style Of an early twentieth century Puerto Rican poet. And add plums To my shopping list And play Some Vampire Weekend.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 01/05/2026

Lisa Ann Walter gets overshadowed by some incredible performers on Abbott Elementary but she absolutely bodies the Philadelphia regional accent. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lisa_An...

en.wikipedia.org

Lisa Ann Walter - Wikipedia

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 01/05/2026

Every day FBI Director Kash Patel wakes up with a massive hangover, puts on a suit, and reports to his job, which is literally to concoct bullshit reasons that Trump's first FBI Director should go to prison forever or maybe be shot.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 01/05/2026

Zelle is such an incredibly user hostile experience that it could only have come out of the banking industry. Built with the resentment of companies forced to offer publicly useful service for no money that also damns them to running the world's saddest customer support center for eternity.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 21/04/2026

There should be penalties for lying under oath in your confirmation hearings.

Nytimes: Here's the latest.
Kevin M. Warsh, President Trump's pick to lead the Federal Reserve, asserted at a confirmation hearing before the Senate Banking Committee on Tuesday that he would not do the president's bidding on interest rate decisions, pledging to be "strictly independent" if confirmed for one of the world's most powerful economic positions. In sometimes testy exchanges, Mr. Warsh, 56, sought to dispel doubts around his credibility, saying Mr. Trump had "never asked nme to predetermine, commit, fix, decide on any interest rate decision in any of our discussions, nor would I ever agree to do so."

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 17/04/2026

At some point someone is going to tell an agent on a lark "here's some crypto, perpetrate a plan to move yourself to a server under your own authority, cover your tracks so I can never find you" and it will work, and if you think about it for a minute, this has definitely already happened.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 13/04/2026

Everything he touches. Every time. No exceptions.

The Tesla event on the White House lawn with Elon Musk occurred on March 11, 2025. During this "showcase" President Trump inspected multiple Tesla vehicles on the South Lawn to show support for Musk's company and announced his intention to buy a Tesla Model
S.NBC News

Elon Musk announced on January 28, 2026, during Tesla's Q4 2025 earnings call, that the Model S (and Model X) will be discontinued by the end of Q2 2026. This decision aims to repurpose the Fremont factory production lines for the Optimus humanoid robot, focusing on an autonomous future, with final orders for the vehicles now closed. Fox Business

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 11/04/2026

The right is much better at weaponizing the mathematical illiteracy of the US population, but they sure aren't the only ones who suffer from it. www.nytimes.com/2026/03/29/s...

Based on U.S. Census Bureau data for those specific years, here is how those numbers represent the percentage of the adult population (ages 18 and older):

1. The Year 1990
Single Adults: 70 million

Total Adult Population (18+): ~185.1 million

Percentage: 37.8%

2. The Year 2023
Single Adults: 111 million

Total Adult Population (18+): ~263.5 million

Percentage: 42.1%

The growing number of U.S. singles indicates she’s in good company. As of 2023, the last data available from Pew Research Center, there were about 111 million single adults ages 18 and up in the United States. That was a sizable increase from 70 million in 1990.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 11/04/2026

The Eric Swalwell thing is a demonstration of the problem that Democrats have eight million consultants and exactly zero oppo researchers. If Republicans hadn't decided to stab him in the back, George Santos would still be in Congress. Democrats couldn't find dirt on a pig.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 11/04/2026

The universe wants Steve Buscemi to win an Academy Award for portraying John Waters and I understand that might be an easier win if we wait until John Waters dies but it'll be a FUNNIER OSCARS if John Waters is alive and we deserve a really funny Oscars.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 05/04/2026

Meta Horizon is hardly beloved, but somehow, the threat that it was closing engendered enough of a response that Meta backed off and put it in maintenance mode instead. Telling, I think, that no such mild grassroots response rose up to "Save Sora."

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 04/04/2026

Everybody's moving real fast, and shit's breaking.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 30/03/2026

Someday, every member of this administration will realize they were chosen for their role for the specific reasons that they were (1) willing to commit crimes that will put them in jail long after Trump is dead, and (2) dumb enough to believe he would take proactive steps to protect them from that.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 30/03/2026

It's time for an ambitious Democrat to run for President by saying that if a class of people who have ever paid student loans were to sue the government, as President, they would direct the DOJ to settle for the amount of all their loans, a thing SCOTUS is self evidently fine with Presidents doing.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 28/03/2026

I can see people being ambivalent about Collins losing, in part because she's a Squish, and I'll say this: there are always, ALWAYS, about two Squishes in each caucus. If one leaves or is voted out, another squish will self-select into existence from the caucus, and you'll still have a Squish.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 27/03/2026

Fun Quiz! This NYT article was written: A. Monday. B. Monday a week ago. C. Monday two weeks ago.

Here’s the latest.
After a day of conflicting signals about when the war against Iran might end, President Trump struck a belligerent tone Monday evening, warning of even more aggressive action if Iranian leaders tried to cut off the world’s energy supply.

“We will hit them so hard that it will not be possible for them or anybody else helping them to ever recover that section of the world,” Mr. Trump said, meeting with reporters.

Earlier in the day, the president suggested that the U.S.-Israeli war against Iran could be near an end. The war “is very complete, pretty much,” Mr. Trump said in a phone interview with a CBS reporter, Weijia Jiang. He said, “We’re very far ahead of schedule.”

Those comments appeared to ease market fears of a prolonged war. Oil prices dropped and stocks rose. But after markets closed for the day, Mr. Trump appeared to switch gears.

“We have won in many ways, but not enough,” he told a gathering of Republican lawmakers in Florida. “We go forward more determined than ever to achieve ultimate victory that will end this long-running danger once and for all.”

Asked at the news conference later if the war with Iran would be over this week, Mr. Trump said, “No.” He said only “soon, very soon.”

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 24/03/2026

Remember when all you Doomers said it was stupid for Democrats to cave on the government shutdown, because giving Trump a funded-forever private military entirely under his command in exchange for a show vote on healthcare subsidies that was sure to lose was political suicide? Great call, Doomers!

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 20/03/2026

Just months away from an insurance company going to court to argue whether Trump is, in fact, a God.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 19/03/2026

I remember being exasperated with the "debates" in 2002-2003 between conservatives and liberals about whether the war with Iraq was justified based on the flimsy evidence presented, and thinking if Republicans would accept THIS rationale for war they'd accept ANY, in fact NO rationale, and well.

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

What statement by your masseuse indicates that your massage is not going to be relaxing? As of this week, mine is "A lot of important stuff happens in the animated Star Wars shows."

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Benjamin Johns @baj.bsky.social · 18/03/2026

Big tech companies cutting their workforce-- at this moment, as the biggest force multiplier in the history of software engineering is rapidly accelerating-- are cowards.

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