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Aaron Waite

@aaronwaite.net
47 followers 85 following 96 posts

Hopeful author and audiobook narrator. Constantly mixing up G.K. Chesterton and C.S Lewis quotes.

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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 30/03/2026
Holy crap, my book is funded! I've got a bunch of stretch goals on tap, so feel free to pile in and get yourself a fun book! #fantasy #Kickstarter #audiobook
kickstarter.com
Update 5: YOU PUT THE FUN IN FUNDED! · Pilfer!
Holy crap. Ya'll did it. You absolute madpeople, you gave me money to make my book.I'm flabbergasted, somewhere in the mix of emotionally stunned, stunted, and stilted. What do you even do with this k...
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Jason K Pargin, author @jasonkpargin.bsky.social · 24/03/2026
Why authors are so annoying about preorders:
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 05/03/2026
Hi, all y'alls! My book's up on Kickstarter, if you're a fan of funny and quietly introspective fantasy like Discworld or found family thievery like Leverage and Firefly, please give Pilfer! a look! www.kickstarter.com/projects/pil...
kickstarter.com
Pilfer!
A fantasy novel with heart, soul, and snark.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 03/03/2026
Crowdfunding for my book is live! If you like your fantasy funny, your families found, and your scoundrels scalawagy please check out Pilfer! #indie #fantasy #selfpublish www.kickstarter.com/projects/pil...
kickstarter.com
Pilfer!
A fantasy novel with heart, soul, and snark.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 02/03/2026
I 100% agree, @torbooks.bsky.social! So why don't all y'all take a quick peek at the first chapter of my book, Pilfer!, crowdfunding starting tomorrow! aaronwaite.net/pilferfirstc...
aaronwaite.net
Pilfer First Chapter — Aaron Waite, Author / Audiobook Narrator
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Seth Rosenthal @sethrosenthal.bsky.social · 20/02/2026
it’s sorta beautiful that a skunk hit by a car will empty the clip and stink up the whole vicinity. A warrior’s death
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 12/02/2026
(This might be a long, pointless rant about map and visual design. If you actually know stuff in this area, I'm extremely sorry for my ignorance in advance) I've been playing far more Valorant than someone with my late-30s PvP sensibilities should. But my kid loves it and it reminds me of Halo CE.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 04/02/2026
Unrealistic side hustle #1: The King's Wit from Way of Kings, but instead you're paid to sit in Starbucks and make fun of people's orders.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 06/01/2026
I made the mistake of playing the demo of Final Fantasy VII Remake, and now Final Fantasy XVI's battle system feels suuuuper boring. That's a problem when I'm 40+ hours into FFXVI.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 02/01/2026
@tiwyfb.bsky.social Hiya! I've got a buddy who watched the Dodgers vs Cardinals on July 4th, 1985, and Ozzie Smith made a great catch in the 8th inning. The closest footage I can find to the date is your 7-6-1985 game. Would you happen to have that game in your stash? Either way, thank you for you!
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 21/10/2025
After watching the ALCS last night, I was inspired to write a poem about the Mariners fandom. Growing up as a Red Sox fan in the early 90s, I genuinely thought I knew I knew misery. As it turns out, I know nothing of pain. Nothing at all.
Hope is a weed
Grows betwixt cracks
In the armor
In the heart
In the soul
It's never false
Just impotent
Growing stronger
Not strong enough
Climbing higher
But not steady
Glorious the view
And so the drop
A Louisville breeze
Sweeps Seattle
Quenching light
The Nor'west dark
Hopes held shut for
Dreamless healing
From the fall
To winter
To the spring
When Sisyphus
Sinews reknit
His heart to sleeve
Shoulder to rock
Upon his head
The curse's mark
Mariners hat
"Onward, upward,"
Mutters a city
Sans malice
Sans feeling
Sans remorse
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Vintage Jerseys & Hats @polyesterunis.com · 06/10/2025
Mr. Rogers & Mr. Stargell, 1980 Pittsburgh #Pirates #Baseball
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 26/08/2025
I think if I had a PC that could run Red Dead Redemption 2 in its truest and best form, I might not play anything else for a few years. The Xbox version is awesome, but if I had mods...well, it's probably best for the people in my life who prefer me to sleep and bathe regularly.
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justingreer.bsky.social @justingreer.bsky.social · 09/08/2025
Pleased to announce the audiobook for Tangleweed & Waterbloom is now available! @aaronwaite.net has done a fantastic job. Join in the adventure with Derry, Barrow, and Caedan in this brand-new format!
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Craig Calcaterra @craigcalcaterra.bsky.social · 16/07/2025
When you omit "A Black man is getting a standing ovation in the Deep South for breaking a record of an all-time baseball idol," you completely alter what Scully was describing as "marvelous." Scully was NOT just broadly marveling. He was marveling at a very specific, very important thing.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 08/07/2025
You know who carved order out of chaos? Whoever programmed your email to see the word "attached" and check for attachments. Wherever you are, know that you are internet royalty.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 19/06/2025
DEAR @dannyodwyer.bsky.social‬ -(STOP)- PLEASE CREATE A COOKIE CLICKER DOCUMENTARY POSTHASTE -(STOP)- IF NOT POSTHASTE REGULAR HASTE WILL DO -(STOP)- FORGIVE THE TELEGRAM FORMAT I HAVE BEEN PLAYING RDR2 AND THUS HAVE FORSAKEN ALL POST-1899 TECHNOLOGY -(STOP)- REGINALD VON GAMEPLAYER ESQ -(STOP)-
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 31/05/2025
While the interminable wait for Esoteric Ebb marches on, here's a description of a bucket to tide you over. Also, it's very late and I should not be allowed to edit audio or video at this hour. Or use a microphone. Or Mountain Dew past 5 PM. chrisbodegard.bsky.social
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 31/05/2025
Space Ghost Attempts to Cover Daft Punk
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 30/05/2025
Everyone crabs about pineapple on pizza when the real travesty is coconut on donuts.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 29/05/2025
Me: "Alrighty, time to finish up this commercial voice over." Me, almost two hours after finishing up the commercial, uploading a Space Ghost Coast-to-Coast pastiche to my Voices.com profile: "I'm not sure how I got here, but I think I'm okay with it."
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 27/05/2025
I gotta ask, when did Hugo Weaving start looking like David Harbour?
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 19/05/2025
The Doom: Dark Ages OST is like the half-brother of Aslan: good but incredibly safe. [Narnia/boomer shooter Venn diagram joke goes here]
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 06/05/2025
Also, if you haven't played the demo for Esoteric Ebb and you're a fan of Disco Elysium, for the love of Kim Kitsuragi, go play it. It's amazing and at the tippy-top of my small stack of anticipated games.
store.steampowered.com
Esoteric Ebb Demo on Steam
ESOTERIC EBB is a single-player CRPG inspired by the freedom of tabletop adventures. Unravel a political conspiracy with your goblin sidekick. Roll dice in tense encounters. Become a cleric of legends...
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 06/05/2025
Sorry, coming up for air after being in the isolation tank that is Clair Obscur. I'm having to resist the urge to parry baristas and cashiers.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 25/03/2025
My newest audiobook narration is a galaxy-spanning sci-fi adventure in the vein of Firefly and The Expanse, but with waaaay more aliens. If you like insane robots, beauty-obsessed aliens, and improvised escapes, y'all should pick this one up! #audiobook #scifi #audible
audible.com
The Shattered Sons
Check out this great listen on Audible.com. A Menace Returned It has been 1,000 years since the legendary pirate gang, the Shattered Suns, terrorized the galaxy. In that time, their exploits have fade...
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 05/03/2025
I've been loving Avowed, just a well-made, well-scoped game with interesting worldbuilding that reminds me of Morrowind in all the best ways. However, I did want to report a bug: when I approach a boar in the wild, the Pet action doesn't seem to pop up. Same thing with the tiny cat thingies.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 17/02/2025
I'm at the point where I'm super excited about fantasy baseball and I wanna join like, 15 leagues. At times like this, I try to think about August Aaron and how many leagues he'd like to juggle. ...usually it's more. August Aaron is a tryhard with a low attention span.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 17/12/2024
I try to give people grace, to understand they're coming from different places than me and I don't know what's brought them to this point in life. But if you refer to controllers as "paddles" or "remotes", try not to take it personally when I plug my nose so I don't breath the same air as you.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 11/12/2024
Life tip: don't buy hoodies from bands in warm locales. For instance: My August Burns Red (Pennsylvania) hoodie - thick, cozy, weather-antagonistic My Demon Hunter hoodie (California) - "I'm sorry, you wanted to keep the weather OUT? Best I can do is make you look cool as you freeze."
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 11/12/2024
What? Me? No, I'm not trying to decide my 3 keepers for my fantasy baseball team in winter. Nope, certainly not trying to decide between Dylan Crews (3yr), CJ Abrams (1yr), James Wood (3yr), Colton Cowser (3yr), and Jackson Holliday(3yr). Nope. Not me. Just a writer writing things.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 10/12/2024
Finished Pentiment. I think a reply with my wife in tow is gonna happen sometime next year. Absolutely loved it, and while Disco Elysium is still my best-written game of the decade, Pentiment is right up against it.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 25/11/2024
I also picked Sekiro back up last night. It made me want to go back to my Elden Ring RL1 for a break from the difficulty. Sekiro pulls no punches and expects you to deflect said punches. The "you suck so bad you're making everyone sick" mechanic is a nice touch.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 25/11/2024
I picked Pentiment back up after close to a year away. I love that it's insistent on you taking your time in its world without making you feel hamstrung. The conversations don't always have a bearing on the story, but they still have a lovely sense of medieval breeze-shooting.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 22/11/2024
How to have an adventure: 1. Cue up a Dragonforce song. 2. Congratulations, everything you do is now adventurous! 3. Repeat as necessary. @dragonforce.bsky.social
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 21/11/2024
Daniel Defoe summing up the thoughts of hopeful authors everywhere.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 20/11/2024
I think once the Maine winter gets underway properly, I'm just gonna make a vocal booth out of a snowbank. My furnace loves to kick in when I'm just getting into a groove. The worst part is, you can baaarely tell it's there in the finished product. But it's enough to make a difference.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 15/11/2024
As an addendum: if you've written a novel (or novels) that went nowhere, that's not wasted time. Time spent writing is never wasted, creation is never a net loss so long as you learn and hone your craft in the process.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 15/11/2024
Here's a wee bit of what I've written/writing/planning to write: 1. A comedic fantasy about a group of thieves using the literal power of forgetfulness to steal stuff. It's querying right now, but I'm 99% sure it's gonna be self-published. Makes me feel excited and like an abject failure.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 14/11/2024
Readers: "Ugh, dialogue is so quippy these days. You can't just have all your characters be witty and ready with a comeback all the time!" Jane Austen, setting down her quill for a moment: "I'm sorry, what?"
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Foolish Baseball @foolishbb.bsky.social · 14/11/2024
Catchers hug their pitchers at the end of games to let them know it’s over and they can go home now. If the pitcher isn’t told to stop, they’ll assume they have to keep playing. Tracking the outs and score is one of the most important aspects of catching.
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Aaron Waite @aaronwaite.net · 14/11/2024
I finished up Castlevania: Symphony of the Night for the first time in close to 20 years. That game's aged like fine wine. The level design, the art direction, character progression, it was so far ahead of the curve. Except maybe voice acting, but even then, it's awfully charming.
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