iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 21/12/2025

What was more satisfying? Jake Paul getting his jaw straight busted or Andrew Tate catching that nasty uppercut?!

Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 29/10/2025

Apparently when I'm birthday drunk I text my ex and buy Madonna's Immaculate Collection on CD. One of these is excusable behavior

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 08/10/2025

I toe the line of pacifism but that AssHole Stephen Miller is fight on sight. or is Or site?I don't know I just want to punch him

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 27/06/2025

"We need to get into that SSA", doge Big Balls quits Doge Big Balls is now working at the SSA Yep no questions here guys

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 09/06/2025

I'm nearly 50, I have a bad hip, bad knees, and a recently repaired deviated septum. with that being said, I will fist fight ICE for people I've never and will never meet.

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 01/06/2025

Never seen police work harder than when there is someone heading out to a Free Palestine rally or if somebody leaves Texas to get an abortion. I don't know any hactivists but maybe one will see this and dedicate a few minutes to ruining that cops life or whatever?

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 25/05/2025

When I am inevitably, and not surprisingly, unanimously elected to a seat in the House, I'm conflicted on what my first order of business will be. A.) try to restore honor and integrity and mayne reintroduce honesty to the body. B.) BEAT THE EVER LOVING SHIT OUT OF MIKE JOHNSON live on cspan.

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 22/05/2025

So do you think the hunger games started out with killing each other for the enjoyment of the ultra wealthy or do you think it started with fun games for citizenship?

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 22/05/2025

If what I remember and understand of the Bible, hell is not the burning sulfur pit of torture and despair but the absence of Gods presence.... Wait a second!!!

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 03/05/2025

How do I, a non-racist, get 20K in gofundme Cash for a new roof without calling a child a disgusting slur?

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 27/03/2025

She sits so dumb, just ate peanut butter and needs haircut but man oh man do I love this little monkey dog!

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 18/03/2025

I picked up a copy of Chuck Schumer's book but it was too hard to hold. it had no spine

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 17/03/2025

At this point when I say im"I want them to do something" what I secretly means is "wrap your bare hands around his turkey neck and squeeze"

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 06/03/2025

I don't know the law very well. Can someone who is let me know if a person said they wanted to "punch speaker of the house Johnson square in the nose" are there any legal repercussions said person could face?

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 06/03/2025

If you told me three years ago there would be a new contender for Biggest Piece of Shit Mayor of NYC against Rudy, I would slap your lying mouth... I would owe you an apology

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 01/03/2025

In case it wasn't clear what he meant, "you've not thanked us" translates to "You haven't sucked my sucked my dick directly and youve not let me pilfer your country's resources. Oh and Putin owns me."

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 19/02/2025

Can anyone that knows anything at all about plants help me out?! I've had this plant for 6 years and it's never made this thing before. Now it's making 3 of them. Is it aliens? Should I call a priest?

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 15/02/2025

Watching My Cousin Vinny, Mona Lisa Vito calling Vincent LaGuardia Gambini a "Dick Head" is still the sickest dis ever recorded on film and I'm not sure my man has ever recovered

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 15/02/2025

Three of the SCJ' have the most punchable faces. I'm not going to tell you which ones, but I bet you already know.

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 15/02/2025

One glass and I keep seeing these blankets out the corner of my eye thinking it's random dog on my couch. The universe is telling me something

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 09/02/2025

Maga seeing money spent on humanitarian aid: "WaiSt oF Tax MonEY!" Also Maga when the Gestapo needs recruits: " SUPER BOWL AD AND BRING IN BAY!"

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 05/02/2025

Show me your coffee stations. My timeline is too depressing #coffee #espresso #homebarista

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 04/02/2025

The "people" over at r/conservative are unequivocally the dumbest collection of ball gargling sycophants I've ever seen. They are living proof that if you give a monkey a typewriter......

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 04/02/2025

You are suddenly amoral and have been commissioned to commit a murder for an ungodly number of money. The catch is your heinous deeds will be investigated by your choice of Tom/John (1 not both) Barnaby or Columbo. Who do you chose to give you the best odds of escaping the hangman's noose?

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 31/01/2025

anyone looking in my window tonight would see me alone on a couch with a half gallon of Traverse City Cherry Fudge and a bottle of pinot noir and say "damn, that dude lives like a king...or he got that depression" I'm here to tell you both are true

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 29/01/2025

@bsky.app how do I reset my email address if I no longer have access to the email account I signed up with?

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 29/01/2025

unless you are 72 years old with 30+ years in DO NOT TAKE THE BUY OUT!

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 29/01/2025

a bottle of Gewurztraminer, Midsomer Murders on one screen and Cyberpunk on another is perfectly acceptable for a guy all alone on a Tuesday night, right?

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 27/01/2025

If time travel existed some would go back to the birth of Christ or to assassinate Hitler Me, I'd go back to 4:30 today and have some Hunan beef and steamed dumplings

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 27/01/2025

Three things that might fire up their respect sub-cultures. 1.) Eight O'clock Coffee Colombian Peaks is one of the best bag of beans your money can buy. 2.)Jack Daniels is technically Bourbon 3.) Donald Trump is legit 1952 style "Mentally Retarded"

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 26/01/2025

The most obscure items have been going missing from my home. Stuff that never leaves the house. A pizza cutter for example. But now, someone or something has recently absconded with one of my cameras. I'm convinced it's gremlins or a crawl space squatter. God I hope it's gremlins!!

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 23/01/2025

Does anyone know what instrument in Damien Rice's "Blowers Daughter" produces the notes so low that my listening room becomes a pressure chamber? It is so perfectly tuned to my rooms acoustics that it has stopped the hearts of 3 elderly people. 2 of which were next door. brutal

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 23/01/2025

anyone want to come over and listen to music with me.... dont make it weird just bring really good wine and your favorite record #musicrecommendations #CDsWelcome #winewednesday #vinyl #wine #fucktrump

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 22/01/2025

Terrible onion looking latte art but the amazing Dizzy album Concert of the Century, never disappoints! Show me your Jazz recommendations!!! #musicsky #vinylsky #jazz

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 22/01/2025

If you're sucking Israels dick while dreaming of sucking Hitler's dick, I am lead to believe that you stand for nothing but hate and sucking dick

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 19/01/2025

Cup number two and Yellowcard. Why would you want to do anything else on Sunday?

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 19/01/2025

I have never been funnier than I was in 2014. My talents are wasted

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 19/01/2025

while we are on the topic of 90s alt, Limp Bizkit (3 Dollar Bill Y'all aside) is basically ICP without the clown makeup.

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 19/01/2025

I've deleted my Meta accounts recently and pushed for all my followers, fans and friends to follow me here. With any luck Bluesky will have 19 new users real soon!

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 19/01/2025

The question has been posed to Bowling for Soup countless times but nobody ever asks the Butthole Surfers, "are you buttholes who surf or like... something worse?"

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 19/01/2025

I would judo chop my nephews adams apple for 2 chili cheese burritos from taco bell. I'm not high, i'm just poor.

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 19/01/2025

I just bought an album for $40. I'm going back to recording songs off the radio like its 1987. This is insulting.

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 09/01/2025

do you think the uber rich that have lost their homes in the CA fires will. A.) realize the importance of social services and pay taxes to support said services B.) propose, finance, and construct a neighborhood fire brigade?

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 09/01/2025

have you ever read anything so morbid that you needed to read 12 years of young adult fiction just to rewire your brain? Chuck Palahniuk, i'm lookin right at you, playa

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 08/01/2025

If you think bacon is good every other opinion you have is questionable

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 08/01/2025

I'm not a bad looking guy, I own my own home, an 810 credit score, knowledgeable in many areas, and im somehow still single. Then tonight, as I performed my bed time rituals, I couldnt stop myself from singing "pooping on your tits" to the tune of Puttin' on the Ritz, and suddenly it all made sense

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 06/01/2025

I've just stood at my counter and ate an entire rotisserie chicken with my bare hands. Now I'm in no way saying I don't believe in evolution I'm just saying maybe cro-magnon mightve had a few good piints

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Michael McAllister @2ems.bsky.social · 06/01/2025

Push Th' Lil Daisies will never not sound like a song from Southpark. Ween, you were so far ahead of your time

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