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illumi

@yallchemist.bsky.social
26K followers 892 following 34K posts

award losing artist non selling author dad baseball nerd

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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 21h
Told my wife before the show I couldn’t wait to shout fuck ICE with Chance and a crowd full of people so this mf repeated the verse like 5 times
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
Dudes rock
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
Also am v drunk
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
The guys in front of me snuck in a pen this is like heaven
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
We’ve been waiting since the 2020 tour got cancelled so I’ll be alright with whatever lol
010
illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
Yes! Venue is crazy small
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
yall I am so close to where chance the rapper is about to perform
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
In Indiana at that
110
illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
Okay @maryallen4congress.bsky.social pop off queen
Spam text I got 

MARY ALLEN for Congress 


Is Mary Allen willing to admit a genocide is taking place in Palestine?
Yesterday 6:51 PM
Yes. She's said that. She refuses to take AIPAC money and would support an end to US military aid to Israel.
Word. Then yes.
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Getting arrested for unplugging my Samsung Smart Fridge
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
If i was at the death of slim shady it wouldn’t have gone down like it did
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
friendr obviously
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
tindr but for making friends in your area
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Buying the SF Giants and forcing Landon Roupp to wear the Woke jersey
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Kid rock but banger typo
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
I’m just getting around to the mid rock collab it’s been a busy week
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
You can’t stop me from spreading the truth
AP FACT CHECK
No, Ghislaine Maxwell did not own a horse named "Bubba"
Che did hawever have a anlden retriever at the time of her and Enctain'c
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Specifically the shitpost formerly linked here: www.yahoo.com/news/article...
yahoo.com
Fact Check: Fake AP Screenshot About Ghislaine Maxwell's Golden Retriever And Horse Bubba -- No Such Article
Did the Associated Press publish a fact check titled 'No, Ghislaine Maxwell did not own a horse named "Bubba"' and did it mention her having a golden retriever at the time? No, that's not true: A vira...
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
@aaron.bsky.team why is your platform taking down posts with no suspension, notification, or appeal process?
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
ai image generation isn’t real they’ve abducted thousands of graphic designers and imprisoned them in the “data centers”
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
taking present day eminem back in time so slim shady can kick his ass
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Regardless, I bet purgatory has weed
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
every friend group has that one homie who’s immune to the finality of death
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
do yall think heaven has cigarettes or is he in hell?
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
tried using a ouija board to talk to my dad. he said he needed to grab some cigarettes but he’d be right back. it’s been three years.
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
i'm at the public execution. i'm at the downfall of civilized society. i'm at the combination public execution downfall of civilized society.
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
wait you mean we aren't actually besties
010
illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
the hatman and me after i take a double dose of benadryl
Trump sleeping in the Oval Officenext to a terrifying woman idk her name sorry but I drew a lil hat on her
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
His son:
Look at me. Look at me.

I am the alpha now.
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
This guy just had me call because his son stole his Facebook page access. He has been out alpha’d
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Don’t tell them
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
manmade horrors coming to a streaming service near you
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
i paid good money to witness these manmade horrors and they better be beyond my comprehension
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
He’d be getting laid in monument park right now anyways
000
illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
Well yeah but it’s also a metaphor
000
illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
Yes
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
The hat is but a metaphor
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
if you take enough benadryl you actually become the hatman
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
No not that time
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
I woke up and ran ONCE and my wife thought i was having a manic episode
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Reposted by illumi
Davis Bickford @davis.social · 07/10/2026
hey 🫵👁️ your art is awesome. keep making it.
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
I’m trying I’m trying
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
i have received zero likes and i have gone viral and my recommendation is to never start posting
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
It was like if hell is full of irony
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
“I need a real alpha male” buddy I did NOT take this job to hear about your fetishes
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
oh no
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
Just imagine comic sans font. Everywhere. That's what I'm looking at based on his wants.
020
illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
Telling my site designer I need her to engulf herself like method actors by listening to Andrew Tate and hating herself
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
I wish this was a made up quote
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illumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
"I need a real alpha male on this website so they understand my business" buddy we have a bunch of graphic designers make your site who do you think gets design degrees
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