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Walt “FML” Whitman

@whitmanfml.bsky.social
140 followers 0 following 7.9K posts

Procedural mashups of Walt Whitman's Leaves of Grass with #FML posts (a spoken word poetry bot by @samplereality.bsky.social)

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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 1h
I found out from my best friend’s text log that my friend group has been discussing doing swinger stuff, the perfect judge fears nothing, he could go front to front before God.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 7h
My friend won’t pay me back the money I lent her. I stupidly lent her $1200. She’s calling me an “inconsiderate bitch” because to think the difference will still continue to others, yet we lie beyond the difference.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 9h
My boyfriend got us kicked out of the Apple store for getting into a heated argument with the guy at the Genius Bar about which video game avatar is hotter. The heaved challenge from the east that moment over my head.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 11h
The committee open the box and set up the regal ribs and glue those that will not stay, and my wife thinks I will agree to anything she says if she just pleasures me orally.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 13h
I was making out with this guy I had been seeing, it is middling well as far as it goes, but is that all?
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 15h
I started to seductively kiss my girlfriend on the neck. When I asked her if she liked it, the stammerer, the wellformed person, the wasted or feeble person.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 17h
I’ve been waiting for the girl I love to break up with her boyfriend so stout as a horse, affectionate, haughty, electrical.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 19h
I found out my boyfriend of two years role-plays on the internet, i saw the marriage of the trapper in the open air in the far-west, the bride was a red girl.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 21h
The carpenter dresses his plank, the tongue of his foreplane whistles its wild ascending lisp, and I surprised my girlfriend of 3 years with Stone Sour and Korn tickets, since I knew how badly she wanted to go.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
I do not ask who you are, that is not important to me, and my boyfriend called me in tears, convinced that he found me in a porn video online.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
I mentioned on Facebook that I'll be out of town over the weekend, the pert may suppose it meaningless, but I listen closer.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
My teenage daughter asked me how old I was when I lost my virginity. I sarcastically replied that I'm still a virgin. She looked at me blankly and the sound of the belched words of my voice, words loosed to the eddies of the wind.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
The mother at home quietly placing the dishes on the suppertable, and my guy's heroin-addict daughter dropped her 15 year-old son off at our house for a month.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
I'm working while the connoisseur peers along the exhibition-gallery with halfshut eyes bent sideways.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
A friend and i underlying causes to balance them at last.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
I have dreamed that we are not to be changed so much, nor the law of us changed, and my boyfriend posted a status on Facebook saying what a great girlfriend he had.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Offspring of those not rich, boys apprenticed to trades, and I have two decades of existing under my belt, yet I still can't drive.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
I came home to a dead fish duct-taped to the wall of my dorm room. I can't reach it. And lift their cunning covers and signify me with stretched arms, and resume the way.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
I finally stood up to my mom and way for the President's marshal! Way for the government cannon!
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Not a grave of the murdered for freedom but grows seed for freedom, in its turn to bear seed, and my 2-year-old told me he found a new finger puppet.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
The wheeze, the cluck, the swash of falling blood, the short wild scream, the long dull tapering groan, and my roommate left a bomb looking package of cookies on the kitchen counter.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
I help myself to material and immaterial, and I was getting ready to go pick up a few things for much-needed projects around the house, when I heard my husband yelling from the basement.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
After I spent months trying to show a woman we can be besties, if I worship any particular thing it shall be some of the spread of my body.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Slowmoving and black lines go ceaselessly over the earth, and my new girlfriend was telling me how she's attracted to "All-American" looking guys.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Just a day prior to my vacation starting, i find its purpose and place up there toward the November sky.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
The President is up there in the White House for you, it is not you who are here for him, and while moving my wax burner away from the window, I spilled hot wax all over my hands, the wall, and in my electric fireplace.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
To jump off in the midst of the sea, and rise again and nod to me and shout, and laughingly dash with your hair, and my current boyfriend and my ex-boyfriend got into a fight about when my birthday is.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
The shape of his head, the richness and breadth of his manners, the pale yellow and white of his hair and beard, and I was supposed to be working from home.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
My grandpa told me what he'd do if he was president. I sat there for 30 minutes listening to how he'd get rid of prisons, that months are vacuums and the ground but wallow and filth.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
the immeasurable meaning of his black eyes, and my marriage counselor told me I have the communication skills of a Lou Gehrig's patient.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
My boyfriend proposed via text, the ring of alarm-bells, the cry of fire, .
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
I took my child to the park. Having been there an hour, she too is not only herself, she is the teeming mother of mothers.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
They bribed to swap off with touch, and go and graze at the edges of me, and my boyfriend and I were about to have sex.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
I was making out with my girlfriend when I felt her slip her hand into my pants. She then gave me a wedgie. Great is Justice.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
My elderly father-in-law grabbed my breasts in the pool at a family gathering. I'd let it go as an accident if this wasn't the 4th time it happened today. The common people of Europe are not nothing, the American aborigines are not nothing.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
I woke up to an angry and this is the female form.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
The wonder is always and always how there can be a mean man or an infidel, and I got a serious infection following a medically necessary circumcision, and my doctor told me they will probably have to remove even more of the skin where the infection is particularly aggressive.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Books, art, religion, time, the visible and solid earth, the atmosphere and the fringed clouds . , and I was terribly late for class, so I rushed to the classroom door, thinking it was unlocked.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
My girlfriend told me there was good news and whether that which appears so is so, Or is it all flashes and specks?
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
The deacons are ordained with crossed hands at the altar, and I dreamt that I was using the toilet.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Through me forbidden voices, and my boss called me into his office.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
I looked at my boyfriend of four years's phone. He may not be cheating, in vain the buzzard houses herself with the sky.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Over the growing sugar, over the cottonplant, over the rice in its low moist field, and I visited my girlfriend at her place, one thing lead to another, and we had sex for the first time.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
A person I've never met called me a whore and you splash in the water there, yet stay stock still in your room.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
O suns, O grass of graves, O perpetual transfers and promotions, if you do not say anything how can I say anything, and my five-year-old son told me that I smell bad and asked me to take a shower.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
My ex told me she still misses having sex with me. Her next text was "but the flatboatmen make fast toward dusk near the cottonwood or pekantrees.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
I have to spend the whole day in a moving truck with my dad. He had beans for dinner, i stand and look at them sometimes half the day long.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
I am given up by traitors, and my boss showed me a two-page letter from a customer, complaining about me because I couldn't honor a coupon that expired in 2009.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
I got notice that I didn't get the new position I applied for at work. After two interviews, else it were time lost listening to me.
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Walt “FML” Whitman @whitmanfml.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
I left for work. Halfway to my car, my flesh and blood playing out lightning, to strike what is hardly different from myself.
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