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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 1h

Spam, in the place where I live (ham and pork). Think about nutrition, wonder what's inside it now (oh boy)

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 3h

Let's go to the deli and chow down!

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 3h

Hello, this is Sy Greenblum, president of Spatula City. I liked their spatulas so much, I bought the company

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 5h

I'm naked in church when I meet a dinosaur. Try to run, but my feet have been nailed to the floor

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 7h

And this weekend only, take advantage of our special liquidation sale. Buy nine spatulas, get the tenth one for just one penny

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 9h

Don't worry 'bout your laundry. Forget about your job. Just crank up the volume and yank off the knob

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 11h

Before you know it, all the kinfolk are-a-sayin' Yeah, buddie, move away from there

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 13h

Huh, now lookie here people, listen to my story. A little story 'bout a man named Jed

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 15h

Workin' three jobs just to stay in debt now

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 17h

What a crazy fluke we're gonna get nuked on this jolly holiday

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 19h

Doctor, won't you tell me, am I going insane. Was it something I ate or something wrong with my brain

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 21h

You might hear some reindeer on your rooftop. Or Jack Frost on your windowsill. But if someone's climbin' down your chimney, you better load your gun and shoot to kill

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 23h

I said it's causin' me such irritation. Living with a hernia - Have to have my medication

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

Can't run, barely crawl. Got a bulge in my intestinal wall

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

Whoah, you like them even if they're lumpy or tough, oh yeah. Whee, It's pretty obvious to me you can't get enough

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

Your belly aches, your teeth grind. Some tater tots would blow your mind

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

I buy a dozen cars when I'm in the mood. I hire somebody to chew my food. I'm an upwardly mobile dude

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 05/10/2026

Like a surgeon, hey. Cuttin' for the very first time. Like a surgeon, got your kidneys - on my mind

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 05/10/2026

Better give me all your gauze nurse, this patient's fading fast. Complications have set in, don't know how long he'll last

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 05/10/2026

Thirty years in the same location I have stayed. There I am - right next door to Willy's Fun Arcade

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 05/10/2026

Well, I never made it past the second grade. It took all of my life for me to learn this trade

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 05/10/2026

Our prices are low, my staff is underpaid. You can buy off the rack or have it custom-made

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 05/10/2026

There's a sale on our gabardine suits today. They're all thirty percent off from yesterday

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 05/10/2026

Please don't reveal the secret ending to your friends. Don't spoil the big surprise. You won't believe your eyes

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 05/10/2026

See severed heads that almost fall right in your lap. See that bloody hatchet coming right at you

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 05/10/2026

Now I'm bein' followed by these Russian spies. They give me some velcro, and an order of fries

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 05/10/2026

Hey good-lookin', want some mayonnaise?

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 05/10/2026

Hey, who's gonna sit by you? Another one rides the bus

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 05/10/2026

Riding in the bus down the boulevard. And the place was pretty packed (Yeah!)

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

Have a banana, have a whole bunch. It doesn't matter what you had for lunch. Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

He took my trousers off, told me to cough

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

It doesn't take a military genius to see, We'll all be crispy critters after World War III

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

Well, I've got I've got a woman named Wilma. Well, I've got I've got a baby named Pebbles. Well, I've got I've got a doggy named Dino

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

Ooh, my little hungry one, hungry one…Open up a package of my bologna

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

And party 'till you're broke and they drag you away. It's OK, you can dare to be stupid!

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

You used to smell half-decent. That hasn't been too recent

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

The night Santa went crazy, the night Kris Kringle went nuts. Now you can't hardly walk around the North Pole without steppin' in reindeer guts

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

I want a new duck. One that won't try to bite. One that won't chew a hole in my socks. One that won't quack all night

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

The super-duper party pony – that pony is me! I always knew that was the kind of pony I would be

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

Harvey the Wonder Hamster, He doesn't bite and he doesn't squeal, He just runs around on his hamster wheel

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

Listen to the Muzak, Hearin' people scream. Sittin' in the waiting room, Readin' crappy magazines

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 03/10/2026

There's garbage in the water. There's poison in the sky. I guess it won't be long before we're all gonna die

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 03/10/2026

I guess you know the Earth is gonna crash into the sun. But that's no reason why we shouldn't have a little fun

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Weird Al Lyrics @weirdallyricsbot.bsky.social · 03/10/2026

Sometimes you feel like a nut. Sometimes you don't

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